<p>These were with me since time immemorial. But since my PhD in Mathematical Statistics the situation is much worse</p>
<p>– Before I had regular visits to a therapist, now I don’t
– I had college community, now I am alone
– I am totally without a friend
– My parents who support me are sort of unhappy, even though I pretend to work on my unpaid internship.</p>
<p>HELP!</p>
<p>SO sorry to hear that life is looking bleak after such a major accomplishment as earning a PhD in Math. You must be very intelligent. But that doesn’t help if you are feeling down, sometimes I think it hurts, you know too much!</p>
<p>Are you looking for a post-doc? You are right, once you have left the academic bubble it is difficult to find your new community. Is there any way you can get involved? Sports? Clubs? Hobbies? Anything to connect with “your people” (people like you, people who understand and care about what you care about)</p>
<p>just keep waking up. each day will get better. </p>
<p>you can’t get to know better days unless you make it through the night.</p>
<p>patience is key right now. be patient (with yourself, especially).</p>
<p>people are rooting for you!</p>
<p>A few thoughts, my friend. I’m sorry you’re going through a rough time. Based on what you stated in this thread as well as your other thread, it seems you are struggling with social isolation as well as feeling at a loss as to what direction to take in your professional life. You are not alone – I’d wager that most people grapple with these issues some time during their life. </p>
<p>There are many things you can do to help yourself:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Talk to a professional, such as a social worker, therapist or even your M.D. Unloading your stresses, worries and fears to a trained, objective ear would make you feel less alone, I believe. If your parents have supported you thus far, I have a feeling they’d be willing to cover the cost of some therapy to help you get jumpstarted. If you don’t want to go back to your previous therapist, get a fresh start with someone new.</p></li>
<li><p>Volunteer your time to someone in need rather than pretend to be working on your unpaid internship. Getting out of the house and interacting with other people, even for a few hours a day or week, can make a world of difference in one’s outlook and mood. Get out of your own head and focus some of your attention on someone other than yourself. There is tremendous need out there and you have a lot to offer – why not make yourself useful.</p></li>
<li><p>Reread the wise advice offered to you on your other thread regarding combining your statistics background with social psychology research, and getting in touch with the career center at your educational institution. I noticed you failed to respond to many of the useful suggestions.</p></li>
</ol>
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<p>PhD in Math is not an accomplishment – I do not like math. I took very long to get my PhD because it is boring to me.</p>
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<p>My parents believe that visiting a therapist may be counterproductive – I depend on them 100%.</p>
<p>Go volunteer. There must be some place in your community that can use your help. Read your local newspaper to find out about local organizations. You need to have other people in your life. This is probably the simplest way to begin that process. </p>
<p>Or see if your local library has classes. Ours, for example, has several adult book clubs. That’s a great way to meet like-minded people. They also offer one time classes which are a great way to get out of the house and learn about something. And see new faces.
And they are free.</p>
<p>This may not be a favorite way but it works for me: physical work. Gardening, such as weeding, cutting things back, mowing and related work. I get a lot of aggression out on weeds. Walking a dog also helps my mood as well as walking in a forest/prairie. I think it helps one not dwell on oneself.</p>
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<p>Thank you very much – this is the advice I can take. I am happy to be supported by my parents even if they control me. I no longer need the “freedom” a 20 year old needs.</p>
<p>My main problem is lack of communication and friends.</p>
<p>Are you living at home?</p>
<p>Said Sigmund Freud: “Love and work are the cornerstones of our humanness.”</p>
<p>Neither of these is compatible with your parents total support and control. Get a paying job, your own place to live, make social connections through all the usual means, live in the world, and you’ll no longer be empty and hopeless (and will have to find a new screen name).</p>