<p>Some recent posts by you college incoming freshman parents have really gotten me thinking about what it’s going to be like for me this time next year. Yikes. So anyway, I’d like to make this offer.</p>
<p>For any parents with kids at colleges within a one hour drive from me (UCSC, Santa Clara, UCBerk, UCSF etc.) I’d be happy to be your CC Empty Nest Buddy. When you feel your kid needs help with any basic living issues, I’ll be happy to jump in on your behalf. PM/email or call me. I promise I’d never visit unannounced. Maybe I’d meet them at Starbucks (or Peet’s if it’s Santa Cruz) and drop off a roll of quarters, some Planet laundry soap, some homemade peanut butter cookies, a case of Trader Joe’s ramen, etc. I’d buy him/her a frappucino, hand over the loot, and be on my way. </p>
<p>So, do you think our kids would go for something like this? </p>
<p>Or, alas, do you think we should leave them alone to find their paths; dirty laundry, homesickness, cookie deprivation and all? </p>
<p>Personally, and I’ll have to verify this, I think my D would love a visit from a loving Mom (someone else’s) as she makes the college transition.</p>
<p>This is an interesting thought. At the very least, it would be helpful to have an “emergency” parent to deal with true emergencies–a local contact not affected by time zone gaps and so forth, someone who could be counted on to keep trying to contact parents no matter what.</p>
<p>I suspect, though, that for the most part the kids who are less independent are probably those that should be cut loose. (??)</p>
<p>Yomama, I think that is a very generous offer on your part… but I think most kids would be absolutely horrified at the suggestion of the visit from someone else’s loving Mom - though they might be happy to take the money, ramen & cookies. Also, having been through this process with my son, I have to say its a little bit more special for a mom to mail the goodie-box to her own kid – I put in a lot of extra little items with special meaning. So I don’t really want some-other-mom taking over on this one, either. And the roll of coins thing is so 20th-century – at least at my son’s college, laundry was paid for with a swipe of the flex-card.</p>
<p>On the other hand, I thought from the thread title that you were offering to be buddies with other empty-nest PARENTS who lived nearby. I certainly could use some real-life empty nester friends to help me revitalize an adult-oriented social life now that my children have abandoned me. Wanna take in a movie?</p>
<p>I’m still planinng to hold that Bay Area, CA, CC get-together after I put Himself on a plane eastward in a couple weeks. Y’all still up for it? (Shades of the party thread…)</p>
<p>My daughter is attending a college that is 6 hours away. Early in her freshman year, we discovered that she was missing a MMR shot that she was required to have and the health center on campus could/would not give it to her. She was home for Thanksgiving, but her doctor’s office was closed the day after Thanksgiving, and there was no way for her to get that shot. However, we discovered that the Health Department in her college town could give her the shot without a doctor’s order. As luck would have it, my brother’s best friend lives in the same town as my daughters college. So we called my brother’s friend, who was more than happy to pick her up, take her to the Health Department and drop her back off at her dorm. (We ended out sending him a gift certificate to a local ice cream place as a Thank You.)</p>
<p>So what I am trying to say is, sometimes it’s nice to know (or at least know a phone number) of someone in a new town.</p>
<p>Peg
whose daughter is now totally caught up on her shots</p>
<p>Mootmom, I’ll come! I’m not quite an empty nester yet… daughter still lives at home, but I absolutely never see her – though things are looking up on the mommy/daughter front when the boyfriend goes off to college on the east coast come September. But we have already established that I no longer need her permission to go off and socialize on my own, so I’m ready. ;)</p>
<p>Thanks Calmom, you’re right, it is a horrifying thought. Mothers have got to fill their empty nest needs doing things not centered around us. Let us go gracefully! Start networks for all yoir new hobbies. I should get my mom to post, she has grown amazingly in interests of her own since we left for boarding school 3 years ago!</p>
<p>A really nice idea, YoMama. Though crisis help (stranded at airport, emergency room) would be more useful for most people than visiting a kid you don’t really know…</p>
<p>I think if a crisis came up, you could post a thread: “Need emergency help in Philly” and people here would step up.</p>
<p>I am in So Calif and would happily help a CC friend who needed it.</p>
<p>Sign me up! The Naval Academy has a program like this called, appropriately, Safe Harbor. If your midshipmen is stuck somewhere or needs assistance, then they call a phone number of a non-profit organization with an answering machine. They press their number and leave a message on the phone, and within half an hour a parent or other responsible person close by (usually military personnel or retired military) is in contact with the mid and taking care of the difficulty, which is usually comprised of being stuck somewhere weird in transit to somewhere weird. It’s cool that when you sign up you have to sign an agreement that you will not charge for taxi service, home-cooked meals, laundry, etc. </p>
<p>We haven’t had to use it for our mid, but have used the informal parent network to arrange for rides from the airport back to the Yard, for places to stay before air travel, and for dropping suitcases, guitars, etc. off at the Yard. It is really great to know that there is always someone close if there is a problem.</p>
<p>We did house 5 Air Force Cadets over 4th of July weekend! That was our contribution. Just hope someone would do the same for our son if it came to it!</p>
<p>So, if anyone has a student at the University of Alaska, Fairbanks, let us know!</p>
<p>I’m also in SoCal, close to UCSB and would be happy to help out if needed. My D goes to school in MD. She has had to count on friends families to “take Care” of her when needed. She did not come home for Spring Break so she stayed with friends when the dorms closed. Also was invited to 2 Easter dinners. I was glad she had so many offers of hospitality. With airfare going up she will be coming home for Christmas and summer only. Not sure what she will do for Thanksgiving but I’m sure it will work out.</p>