<p>S2 graduates from high school tonight. Reports to service academy in two weeks.</p>
<p>House will be empty. Now what do we do?</p>
<p>Find a hobby, pursue something outside of your comfort zone. I have been very satisfied that I went this route. Makes me happy, that means that people around me will be happy also.</p>
<p>For some people, particularly those who deemphasized their careers to raise their children, giving work a higher priority in your life may be a good option.</p>
<p>That’s how it worked for me. At the time when my second and last offspring started college, I was doing freelance work and not earning as much as I would have in a full-time job. I tried to find some better freelance assignments (unsucessfully) and then gave up on that approach and spent several months looking for a full-time job (with eventual success). At the same time, I also took some job-related courses at a local college. </p>
<p>By the end of kid #2’s freshman year, I had a job that required more of my time and energy than would have been appropriate when I had kids at home, and I was earning significantly more money than I had as a freelancer. With tuition to pay and retirement looming in the not-too-distant future, the money is welcome, and with the empty nest at home, the involving job is a plus rather than a minus right now.</p>
<p>I still miss both kids, though. Every day. Intensely. But it helps to be busy. And the rational part of me realizes that the people I am missing are the children they were, not the adults they have become.</p>
<p>My own list:
Stop buying poptarts. Only clean one bathroom. Forget how to nag. Buy quart-sized milk cartons. Never have to switch the TV from the XBox back to a regular channel when I turn it on. Learn how to shovel snow again. Give me a minute, I got more…</p>
<p>This is my empty nest list…</p>
<p>Travel when it suits us, not when it fits the team calendar or the school calendar.<br>
Eat sophisticatedly.
Control the remote.
Enjoy finding things in their rightful places.
Volunteer more. (Does the HS guidance office need college search assistance?)
Get SCUBA cert.
Organize the photos.
Make Christmas gifts, don’t buy them.
Finish a triathlon.</p>
<p>^ I like the last one. But I have always worked full time and exercised 2 hours /day 7 days/week and never clean my house (have cleanning lady) and there was nothing to nag about either. We all watch different TV’s, D. does not like watching it, no pblem with remote. Do not like to cook either. All photos are organized into numerous albums. And yes, with my new hobby I have tons of presents to give away, creating too many things and flooding my house with them. So, I appreciate when people take them for Christmas, B-days or no reason.</p>
<p>UMDAD - You will have an adjustment period, for sure. Our only child went to college last fall. It seemed strange not to have her at the supper table, etc. And not to know who her friends were, what she was doing, etc.
We starting doing projects around the house that had been put off. It made our evenings go quicker.
We joined the YMCA in January and went together 3 or 4 nights a week. We weren’t really together at the Y - Each doing our own thing.<br>
The stress of being “mom and dad” went away. Even though we had always been a couple, we became much closer. Enjoyed each other more.<br>
Good luck to you. Let us know how it is going.</p>
<p>It took us a while, but after D was gone, we FINALLY remembered how to occasionally act impulsively. Jumping in the car on weekends and just driving “God knows where” for a weekend. Remembering the ADVANTAGES of not having a kid around.</p>
<p>“Volunteer more. (Does the HS guidance office need college search assistance?)” Too too funny, DougBetsy.</p>
<p>My advice is to find other parents in the same boat and hang out with them!</p>
<p>When my oldest left for college, I got a group of 5 couples (basically his 4 best friends’ parents) and had a “Semi-Empty Nest” party a few weeks into the fall semester. Just wine and desserts, nothing too difficult. We started out by talking and laughing about drop-off, and sharing funny stories from when the boys were in school, but eventually the conversation veered of into other subjects that we, as intelligent adults, were interested in. We had so much fun we have gotten together every few months since then. This fall, 3 of the 5 couples will drop the “Semi” and become Empty Nesters. Maybe we’ll meet at restaurants or something.</p>
<p>I also have a friend who will be in her 2nd year of an empty nest. We are already planning visits to museums, movies, etc.</p>
<p>MiamiDAP - I am intrigued - what do you create? No wait, don’t tell me - I’ll send my address and you can surprise me.</p>
<p>I am not good. I just learned it 2 years ago, some people are doing it since childhood. I am doing pottery, both on a wheel and handbuilt. It is such a fun for me, but I would not know if I have never tried. I did not have any art class in my entire life.</p>
<p>We’re having an “Empty Nest” party in September for all the parents in a similar situation. I love the idea of a list of “must remember to…”</p>
<p>eat fish whenever we want
only watch professional sports teams
cancel Costco membership
decorate with breakable items
…</p>
<p>
We got a dog to help the house not seem so empty.</p>
<p>Kids (both of them) went to college in 2003.
Traveled a lot with husband.
Got one dog.
Husband took up bicycling.
Husband bought into a bike business.
Got another dog.
Developed a strong interest in dog training and started competing in dog agility.
Husband grew business.
Kids graduated from college in 2007.
Continued with dog agility.
Bike business grew more.
Sold house.
Moved to Portland.
Continued with dog agility.
Bike business became multiple businesses.
Son moved to Portland to work in one of the businesses.
Son moved in.
House no longer empty.</p>
<p>This is a funny thread. One post is funnier than the next!</p>
<p>Great thread— Kids want us to get a dog when the house is empty, but I want to be able to travel at a moment’s notice… Maybe they don’t want us to visit THEM at moment’s notice, and a dog would keep us at home more.</p>
<p>As people who have never had a small dog: Get a small dog. You can travel almost anywhere with them.</p>
<p>Kittys are easier… a multi-day waterer & feeder and a sandbox, and you’re good to go away for the weekend. And you’ll have a warm fuzzy friend to come home to. :D</p>
<p>This is a featured post on the cafe. But it has between 300-400 posts. It is refreshing to start a new one.</p>
<p>We were once empty for awhile. But graduated S is now living back with us.</p>
<p>Empty nest was emotional at first–but then was great. We had s*x whenever, wherever and as loud as we wanted. Haha. H and I explored all of the festivals and local event we did not attend because we were attending kids events and/or they didn’t want to go and we had no babysitters. We also spontaneously went away for a weekend or mid-week.</p>
<p>When our last kid is out of college, and we am not there yet, I hope the financial freedom will allow for some great adventures. Weekends away, travel, eating out more often (and we already eat out a lot.) This is my hope.</p>