<p>I have undiscovered planets in my head. I’ve always had them in my head, solar systems, and even galaxies that stretched across the deep oceans of space. Since I was a kid, I could imagine worlds, characters and settings to the finest detail. I would bore a hole through the rigid ceiling thinking myself awake at night, creating scenarios, plotlines and dialogs. I would often swirl ideas about the land where my parents treaded in Ethiopia. Sometimes ideas about Haile Selassie, the last and final monarch from the country. I have been harassed and blessed by these thoughts all throughout my childhood. In the halls in elementary school, I would sometimes physically reenact something, like an action scene, I imagined in my head: much to my embarrassment if I realized someone was watching me the entire time. But the seeds of my lineage are from humble beginnings, with stories that I couldn’t fathom coming from a film screen, let alone an actual experience. My Father, the eldest of 8 brothers and sisters, was the son of deacon who narrowly escaped death in a fascist Italian prison camp in Somalia. Active in his faith, he graduated top of his class and moved to Oklahoma with 50 dollars in pocket through a full-ride scholarship. Thusly evading the horror that ensued a year later. My mother however, grew up in the midst of this horror, as Emperor Selassie was overthrown and replaced by a communist military junta run by a dictator. Also devout in her Christian faith, she found herself imprisoned and tortured for her beliefs along with the harsh persecution of her brothers and close friends. After earning advanced degrees in mathematics, my father received certification by the U.S. department of labor to become a U.S. resident and eventually a naturalized citizen. He also gave back to the Ethiopian community by designing Ethiopic Software allowing Ethiopian text (ge’ez) to be written digitally. This was huge, as it allowed Amharic to be written on web pages, emails, and even be searchable characters on Google! My mother was sponsored in Iowa and after having children and earning her BA in psychology, also became a naturalized citizen. She currently is starting her own business selling Ethiopian delicacies in food retail stores so that Ethiopian cuisine can be known and added to the palate of American dining. The tale of my parents’ hardships and incredible triumph in uphill circumstances became the ultimate story for me, a story that would live on through me. The story however was unfinished. I was born. Where is my contribution and how can I continue the legacy of what my parents started? This is where my brainstorming power was really at it’s zenith, and I transitioned from formulating plot ideas about the outside world, and start concocting a story about myself and my mark on the world around me. All things seemed to lead up this point, all the films I’ve created, the long hours I spent developing video games, all the poems and short stories I had written, all the Ethiopian tunes I played on the saxophone, a culmination of all of that came down to the last masterpiece that would underline all I have ever done. In an essay for XXX, the one place that could fulfill my dream to be game designer, and also feel the free-spiritedness of an open minded college. I wanted to be a representative not only for the Ethiopian community, but also for all immigrants and sons of immigrants alike. Being accepted would mean the world to me as I would be able to show the power of a creative mind to those who had humbling pasts and the outcome of those who dream bigger than the confines of their bedroom, their neighborhood, or even their universe. Because I truly believe that grade point averages can only fit a piece of paper. While dreams can expand past the stars.</p>
<p>bumppp…</p>
<p>focusing too much on your parents & too many different ideas - you need to organize your thoughts.</p>
<p>I think you should avoid talking too much about your parents. I feel like I’m reading a biography of your mom which is not good. Talk about yourself! It’s you that the adcom wants to know about.</p>
<p>A lot of sentences in the first part are unnecessary.
And you talk WAY too much about your parents. You need to focus on YOUR world.
I think you should add things like how you understand your family’s history and then start an organization or club to offer help,things like that…</p>
<p>thanks!!!..</p>
<p>Hey I’m Ethiopian too! What business does your mom own? I live in DC with all the other Ethiopians lol.</p>