<p>I am taking a year off from my university, but can’t stop grinding my teeth over my former roommate. She is a soccer star at school and was there two weeks ahead of the start of term, so when I arrived, she already had tons of friends. She appeared to be really nice at first, but a few weeks in, things started to change. I had dropped off my mini fridge a week before, and she plugged it in on her side of the room and put her microwave on mine, and said she didn’t want to switch them. She used the top of my fridge as a bedside table, and it got scratches all over it from her desk chair.
Over the semester, she started to ignore me. Pretty much the only times we’d talk was a “Hi” when one of entered the room, and “Bye” when we left. She would sit at the opposite end of the table during hall dinners, even if there was an open seat next to me, and when she’d promised to watch a movie with me on several weekends, she’d bail by lying about too much homework, so I’d either go home and see pictures of her hanging with her friends on Facebook, or be stuck on campus with nothing to do.
She’d be nice to everyone but me, so everyone thought she was perfect, and frequently said so. She gave me only 3 days notice of a friend coming to stay in our very small room when she’d previously told me that the friend was going to be staying in a hotel. While the friend was there, she invited had another friend visit and one of them slept in my bed without asking my permission, because it was messed up. Neither of them would talk while I was in the room, so I set up my laptop sound recorder while I went to dinner, and caught them gossiping about me with one of my roommate’s cronies. Apparently, my roommate had friends in my classes who would report to her about whatever I did, especially in Psych, where it was supposed to be confidential.
In the spring, she asked another girl to be roommates with her the next fall while sitting practically across the table from me, then proceeded to stab that girl in the back by agreeing to room with an older girl the very next week. She would pick ideas for “roommate dates” out of a cup with this girl right in front of me, and do tons of other nasty things. And at the end of the semester, she still acted like everything was all fine and dandy.
I’ll admit that I’m a pretty introverted, but I feel that we would’ve gotten along well if she’d ever given me the time of day. I’m really dreaded bumping into her on campus next fall, especially since we have a lot of friends in common from our hall. It’s a really small campus. I know that I should just forget her and she’s not worth my time, but I can’t seem to. I know it’s by far not the worst roommate story, but I really need some advice. What should I do to resolve this?</p>
<p>Tell her how you feel, about feeling ignored and mistreated. There’s a chance that she wasn’t doing that stuff on purpose. Or maybe she even thought all of that stuff would just roll off of you. Either way, if you don’t see a change of heart or anything like that, she’s not worth your time. You guys don’t have to be best friends, but I think that by putting all of it into the air she’ll see your perspective more.</p>