<p>So I connect with these people that I haven’t seen for at most 14 years on Facebook. Some of them have 200 to 500 friends. Am I supposed to say something, like “Hi…How have you been for the last 14 years?” This seems rather superficial. </p>
<p>Some of the stuff on these Facebook pages are “off the wall”…very revealing pictures, picture where nobody looks close to sober and there are drinks in people’s hands, people talking about making Meth, etc. Are these people effing crazy? I mean I worked in Industry, and if your managers or HR say some of these pictures, it would seriously haunt you. </p>
<p>Does Facebook have any real uses? I’d really like to connect to one woman I used to know years ago…connect other than just be each other’s friends on Facebook, but it seems rather awkward to do anything like sending a message, instant messaging, or (worst idea) posting on her wall.</p>
<p>The only use I found so far is to find some things to do or be invited parties, as I am back in College as a PhD student…everybody here has a facebook page.</p>
<p>I am a young person but hopefully my insight will be useful. Your facebook is whatever you want it to be. I personally go through every few months and remove people that I don’t talk to regularly. I have around 30 “friends” because the only people I keep are relatives and people I am speaking to on at least a semi-regular basis. For a while I used it to keep up with friends from a few years ago before we all moved to new cities, but when we eventually grew too far apart to talk regularly I removed them, too. You don’t need to collect 500 friends that you haven’t seen in 15 years if that doesn’t make sense to you. Facebook is a tool to use as you see fit. For some people it is going to have a lot of uses, for some people not so much. It’s up to you how you want to use it. </p>
<p>I personally use it to keep up with relatives and friends that I tend to only see a few times a year (but am still emotionally close to, like my sister), to be notified of social events, and to spread the word about my own. I post pictures, but very rarely. I can count on one hand how many times I have uploaded photos in my 8 years of using social networking sites. I only post photos that would reflect me in a positive light. Usually vacation photos or professional shots for holidays or something.</p>
<p>You don’t have to be friends with anyone you don’t want to. If your old college buddies/acquaintances don’t seem like people you’d like to be in touch with (or be known as a friend of), don’t friend them. </p>
<p>You could connect with the one woman you want to by sending a message–that would be private. A wall posting is more public. Tell her in 25 words or less what you’ve been up to and ask the same of her. Either you will have more involved conversations eventually, or you won’t.</p>
<p>If you de-friend someone (just pull up your Friends list and click delete) it doesn’t notify the other person, so you don’t have to worry about being rude. If you’re not close to them and haven’t communicated via FB in a while, they’ll probably never notice you aren’t on their friends list.</p>
<p>The thing that gets me too about facebook is that it potrays life as something it is not. I read the page of a former friend I knew and she said on her Info “Life is Sweet”…Don’t get me wrong this is a nice person who said this, but I’d never say “Life was Sweet” because for one Life is not usually “Sweet” for me, and when it is it is almost always short lived. I mean it not that way for %99 of all humans…</p>
<p>You know it’s strange, if I start thinking that “Life is Sweet” or should be “Sweet”, I starting making bad decisions, and I’m not as happy.</p>
<p>Well, I’m glad Life is Sweet for your friend. That’s her opinion and she is free to put that on HER facebook page. If you don’t like what she says, block her status updates!</p>
<p>I love facebook and have reconnected with many, many wonderful people, and have met new online friends who share some of my interests. I take what I like and leave the rest. I don’t play farmville, Mafia Wars or get into political debates. I do celebrate life’s joys with my old and new friends and share the good and the bad in my life.</p>
<p>I agree…of course there are no rules…each to his/her own…as the title of this this thread would indicate it baffles me…that’s just me though.</p>
<p>Yea, the first time I read about a friend finding a golden egg and a lost little pony on thier Farm, I ignored all farmville. Again…each to her/his own…even when it comes to farmville… .</p>
<p>I have been on FB for about a year. I don’t have hundreds of friends and about half of them are family or friends from when I was growing up (another area of the country).</p>
<p>I don’t friend everyone. I de-friend people or hide their posts if they tend to post things that I wouldn’t want my kids or nieces to see.</p>
<p>Last month, I met a friend that I hadn’t seen in twenty years after finding her on FB and realizing that she lives less than two hours away. To me, that is what FB is all about for us 50-somethings. It’s an easy way to keep in touch with distant friends and relatives.</p>
<p>I blocked the Farmville application… I enjoy facebook and reading updates (including MOWC’ and some other CC friends!) But… I make sure that my privacy settings are “friends only” for all aspects, including photo albums. It always surprises me to have access to photo albums of people who I am not friends with; some folks keep their profiles closed but leave their albums wide open…
And facebook has been wonderful in connecting with relatives across seas, and friends from the past. We spent the weekend with friends that we reconnected with through facebook. It’s a lovely tool to use…</p>
<p>Many people seem to enjoy the games. For those that don’t (and I’m one), the simple thing to do is to block those applications. Then your news feed won’t be cluttered up by announcements among your friends who are playing the games. Simply hover over the upper-righthand corner of the news item, and when an “X” appears, click it. You’ll have the option to block all news from that person, or all news from that application. Easy.</p>
<p>I understand why you are baffled if you aren’t getting anything out of the experience. But to further help you understand what some OTHER people might be getting out of the experience that makes it so popular, I share the following, from a blogger named Nancy Baym:</p>
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<p>I find that my ongoing connection to friends and family makes me feel much more connected to people I see in person only once in a while–my cousins, my college roommates, former colleagues. I see pictures and videos of them and their kids, have a window into their lives, and give them a window into mine. When we do get to see each other, it’s as if we’ve been chatting weekly the whole time. I add only people I want to be in touch with.</p>
<p>The social networking aspect is much more prominent in my kids’ experience, where they are often discovering that friend A and friend B know each other from camp or youth group or some other connection. (I think every kid who does musical theater in the metropolitan area is connected to one another by no more than two degrees of separation.) That’s fun for them.</p>
<p>I have found it good for connecting with friends I used to talk to once a year with Christms cards who live across the country. Also relatives. I dont put htings on that I dont want people to see. if Ihave something private I will message them. Its just fun. My kids think I 'creep" on them, but I find their pics rather boring, and mostly dont understand them anyway. who wants to see the same person making a million different faces? It is also good for the kids they remain in contact with people they might otherwise have lost track of.</p>
<p>Thanks for all of the responses…It is nice to see pictures of old friends and their little kids. Facebook is an efficient way to let all friends see such pictures.</p>
<p>The thing that freaks me out about facebook, is that people share way too much. I worked in corporate world before this(school), and the economy is quite bad(sorry to blind with the obvious). Managers would be looking for the smallest reason to fire or not hire. One stupid comment about a stupid or inappropriate picture which is leaked to your manager via a newsfeed that a friend of a friend can see or by one of your so called “300” friends could really be trouble.</p>
<p>Even innocuous things can be trouble. I could post jack63(me) by a beach. Somehow my manager sees it. Let’s say jack63 lives in Iowa, my manager now thinks jack63 is well off enough to go enjoy a beach on one of the coasts. Manager(knowing my salary) will then wonder how jack63 gets the money to enjoy a beach. There is nothing good about this if you’re jack63.</p>
<p>You can set the privacy settings so that literally no one but your friends can see anything at all if you want to, I believe. It’s just that a lot of people don’t bother.</p>
<p>I’ve found FB really valuable. It has enabled me to find and meet up with old friends, and actually rekindle friendships in real life (not just virtually). It has also connected my large extended family who live all over three different countries (we spent decades barely in contact and now we see each others’ happy goings on weekly). It’s fun and light, and of course it’s just one slice of reality. </p>
<p>I have never used the apps, and I block any that end up on my wall. I rarely see apps anymore.</p>
<p>I’m not a fan of the continual changes to the privacy settings but understanding how they work and using them diligently is important. That, and using some basic judgment (e.g. post as if the world can see it). My kids and their friends do not even use their real names.</p>
<p>One new concern I just read about was geotagging. If you upload pictures to the internet from your iphone (or a camera with gps), it can reveal the location to those that want to find it out. Now I need to figure out how to disable that.</p>
<p>Deaths of members of our high school graduating class (and their parents) are announced via Facebook. We were able to send a very nice floral arrangement on short notice upon the death of one of our classmates. </p>
<p>Another thing I don’t understand…“Are those 6 friends that they show on your profile page random?” They can’t be. I’ve almost sorta calculated probabilities(This it what happens when you let an engineer on a social networking site), and it is really not possible that these 6 friends are random.</p>
<p>It seems that they tend to put newer friends, friends who log in a lot, friends who’s profile you like to look at, or perhaps friends who look at your profile in your 6 friends more often than not. I tend to have the same set of 10 to 15 friends showing up in my profile regularly.</p>
<p>I had a friend FB me, telling me a friend a(not on FB had died) I only talk to her once in a while. So I made the call, and left a message, “please call me” she did and she was not dead!!! I guess the alumni newspaper had been wrong thank goodness. good thing she has a great sense of humor, having gone through a tough illness this year, I would not have found it humorous at all! I hate farmville, but i like family feud, keeps me thinking!</p>
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I enjoy facebook and reading updates (including MOWC’ and some other CC friends!) But… I make sure that my privacy settings are “friends only” for all aspects, including photo albums. It always surprises me to have access to photo albums of people who I am not friends with; some folks keep their profiles closed but leave their albums wide open…