<p>I had a laugh this morning when I checked my email… my friend’s mother wants to Friend me on Facebook. She is a perfectly nice, youthful 76 year old lady with whom I exchange pleasantries once or twice a year when she is in town for a visit. Anyway, that was not the funny part.</p>
<p>I was surprised and amused that my knee-jerk reaction was… discomfort! As if my friend and I (early 50’s) have anything posted on Facebook that we might not want her to see! I’m sure my level of discomfort is only a fraction of what my son would feel if one of my friends wanted to Friend him. </p>
<p>This made me think about my relationship network. How many degrees of separation are too many? Does it make sense to Friend peripheral people with whom you do not have a primary relationship, or with whom you do not exchange holiday cards? Someone (adult) told me that they cap their Friend list at 200 because beyond that, the relationships feel too diluted.</p>
<p>everyone is different. I had someone with the same name as me in another country want to friend me and this did cause some discomfort. I don’t want everyone looking at my things, but find on FB I see things from people I am not friends with because I am friends with someone they know. I am suprised at what people put on there. esp kids. anyway, I would not have a problem with the older lady as she prob just wants to connect in a social way. its complete strangers. FB is really just superficial.or should be.</p>
<p>In the beginning, I thought I’d have some control over it. Now I realize–not so much. Once you start letting on your high school class from 40 years ago, it’s all over. I love the idea of a 76 year old on FB. And my son let me friend him–with limits. There is no privacy anymore. I’m not sure it matters.</p>
<p>I think it’s great that a 76 year old is open to new things like Facebook, feels comfortable enough with you to friend you, and I wouldn’t hesitate for a second. It’s not like you and your friend put things on Facebook that you don’t want other people to see, do you?</p>
<p>But I know how you feel. My cousin said to me when my mother (her aunt) was recommended to her as a friend that now she understood how her son felt when she wanted to friend him.</p>
<p>Maybe your friends mother is beginning to have trouble getting out, and welcomes the glimpse into others lives that Facebook gives her. I certainly wouldn’t begrudge her that.</p>
<p>I took down my Facebook profile because so many people wanted to friend me that I didn’t want to be friended by… Imagine my shock when my LinkedIn profile shows me one link away from my ex-husband.</p>
<p>I’ve been back in touch with an old friend who is the self-appointed Gladys Kravitz of our high school class. She’s urging me to go on Facebook, and seems to have collected over half the old class as ‘friends.’ I’m still leaning against it. Feel somewhat anti-social, but figure I didn’t know them back then, and it’s sort of too much trouble to get to know them online now-- with 30 years of history since.</p>
<p>One of my friends seems to have found and friended everyone who was in our year at our college. I remember some of these people but I can’t see making an effort to friend them and see what is up with them now; I barely knew what was up with them then! </p>
<p>I wouldn’t say no to someone’s request to friend me, though.</p>
<p>I am personally connected to all my “friends” but occasionally I weed out my list. Sometimes I connect with someone, we catch up and then I don’t connect with them and I am not really interested in their updates every day. Then I unfriend them. No one seems to notice. Often, especially younger people, just friend everyone they know. I have stopped accepting these friends because there is no point. I really use facebook to keep up with relatives and good friends or reconnect with old ones…not to just collect people.</p>
<p>I am friends with both my children and it isn’t a problem for them as far as I know. In fact, I unfriended my oldest son figuring he might like privacy and he was upset and asked me to add him again!</p>
<p>I asked my 72 year old father to join facebook so that I could more easily share photos and short video clips of the kids and the new Puppy! They live in Florida,far from all the family. Now they get to see all the young growing families within our extended family and get updates regularly. It has been so nice for them.</p>
<p>I have actually found it interesting and rewarding to be “friends” with high school classmates even though we weren’t particularly friendly in high school. I don’t know how to explain it- it’s just a different vibe. Kinder, gentler. Some of them have parents who were friends with my parents, and we update each other on the lives (and deaths) of our parents. It almost seems like there is more common ground now that we are adults than there was in high school. It’s been really neat- and we are planning our 40th reunion. I went to our 20th and didn’t particularly enjoy it, but I think this one is going to be great- mainly as a result of our facebook interaction.</p>
<p>I think it all depends on how high your need for socialization is. Mine is high. My husband, on the other hand, could go for years without making a new friend or getting back in touch with old ones.</p>
<p>my 71 year old mother was the one who got me on FB. I work with alot of mid 20’s it gives me some credit to be on FB. I still reserve the right to not accept a friend. However I rarely do it. agree Jamiecakes take on it.</p>