<p>I agree with SteveMA … sending a thank you card for a condolences card is silly. As for that handful of “do I, don’t I?” situations, I suggest erring on the side of “do.” JMHO.</p>
<p>Very sorry for your loss. Both of my parents have passed, and I miss them every day. God Bless.</p>
<p>It’s very nice of you to send thank you’s. I think a family death is one case where people won’t be offended by not getting one or by getting one really late, though. if I sent a condolence card or brought food or watched the dogs for a week or whatever – I would not be expecting my friends to send a thank you note. And it’s probably one case where sending something six months after the fact letting your friend know how much he/she helped you get through that time would not be frowned upon for being late, but appreciated.</p>
<p>So sorry for your loss. </p>
<p>If your husband thinks the cards need cards, he can do them, but I suggest that he do cards with no notes. I agree that letters deserve a response, but for the most part I don’t believe I’ve received them and I have not gotten my panties in a twist about it either.</p>
<p>^ I’ve noticed the same thing about condolence letters, mathmom. Miss Manners says that of course we should write them. I find them very hard to write, and usually agonize over what to say. I’ve only rarely received a written acknowledgement for one. This doesn’t bother me, because I’m writing to ease someone’s burden. If they find it difficult to respond for whatever reason, I understand completely. </p>
<p>The one drawback to not hearing from the bereaved is feeling that my note may have said the wrong thing, which is why I agonize about what to write in the first place. In all honesty, I don’t even mind if people don’t acknowledge more concrete offerings in a time of grief. I like eirean’s post 22 about this:
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<p>The OP asked the question because she, herself, wants to acknowledge those who have been supportive or considerate during a difficult time. That’s a completely different thing than the notion that others would or should be “offended” to not get such a note. People don’t reach out because they expect anything in return.</p>
<p>I think Emily Post’s advice is good, but I would add that I wouldn’t consider just a few words handwritten onto a commercial sympathy card to require a thank-you (i.e., “We’re thinking of you,” or “So sorry,” etc.). This will mean (in my experience) that the vast majority of sympathy cards will not require a response, and I don’t think many people would expect a response to a card like that.</p>