<p>I send you a hug. A few more things that might help:</p>
<p>1). Understand that your parents are loaded with worries and you are their shining star. Their dreams for you may not be realistic but may be needed at this time. </p>
<p>2) It’s dumb to argue about where you will go to college before April 1 of your senior year. A good way to avoid arguments is this: Mom picks a college. Dad picks a college, you pick two. Do all four applications to the best of your ability. After those four are done, consider whether or not you want to do more. Do not argue merits of any until you have in hand the acceptance and the fin aid package. </p>
<p>3) For you to apply to a highly selective school, you will need two or three SAT II subject tests. You can sign up now for testing in June. Once you get SAT II scores and SAT scores in hand, you can ask your parents to help research colleges that have students in your score range. Do your best on these tests. You may surprise yourself. </p>
<p>4) Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. One of my S was accepted to Dartmouth and they have been very generous to him. He is getting an excellent education and while it is still a scramble for us, it has been worthwhile. So, swing for the fences and hope you hit a home run. Meanwhile, keep a shrewd eye out for your other options. </p>
<p>5) Please read “Emotional Blackmail” and “Toxic Parents” by Susan Forward. These are quick reads. She does a great job of helping the reader see the dynamics of relationships and how we can set boundaries so that we don’t feel like a doormat – and we don’t feel traitorous either. </p>
<p>You sound like a great kid. Between family pressures and the limited freedoms of high school, you may feel like exploding or running away through out the next 20 months. Please know that THIS is the most stressful time in many people’s lives. Many, many people enjoy college MUCH more than high school. Hang in there.</p>