<p>neurosurgeon "</p>
<p>EVERY one of them are looking for clues that you can afford them. Let’s be real. LOL.</p>
<p>VaBluebird, if you can’t afford them, there is no point in going through rush in the first place. </p>
<p>“Yes, but college rankings are done mostly with quantitative data. This thread makes frat/sorority bidding sound like the mean part of middle school.”</p>
<p>But if it doesn’t matter to you, it doesn’t MATTER. There is absolutely zero consequence to someone who goes through the system, finds friends she likes and joins a “lower tier” house. She gets the exact same experience / benefits as the person who joined the “top tier” house. They all do the same things, form the same friendships, etc. Really, unless you’re at some stupid school where they take it all way too seriously, everyone just goes about their day and does their own thing.</p>
<p>The main reason I transferred after freshman year was that 90% of my tiny freshman campus was Greek. In fact, all the dorm housing was divided up with sections of each floor for the sororities. The frats all had houses. None of the men lived on campus after freshman year except a very few who were not in the frats. If you didn’t get a sorority bid, you actually had to “petition” the sororities to love on “their floors”. It was weird.</p>
<p>After the first round of rush, I received invites to second rounds for three of the 6 sororities (school had a total population of about 900). I honestly didn’t really care by that point, but my roommate really wanted to be in a sorority. She received NO second invites. I went and spoke to the dean of women students who also was the person who called us all in and issued the invites. I asked if I could give my three to my roommate. Of course, the answer was NO.</p>
<p>I sent out transfer applications the following week. It made me crazy that someone who really wanted to be part of the system was excluded. Oh…and she wasn’t a deadbeat. Her parents owned an oil business. She wasn’t the most popular freshman girl…but still. </p>
<p>One upperclassman friend, a KD who wanted so to be my big sister, was crushed when I pulled out of rush completely. I never regretted it. Not for a minute. I kept in close touch with these KD sisters, many of whom were my friends. My roommate competed four years of school…she went through rush again as a sophomore, but never received a bid. She petitioned to live in one of the dorms…and that was that. </p>
<p>I should add, I transferred to a school where less than 10% of the students were part of the Greek system. It never dawned on me to go through rush there. But my best friend was in a sorority, and lived in the house. I was a frequent and welcomed visitor. The house mother actually made sure there was a bed for me, and a place set at dinner during exams. I usually studied there. </p>
<p>I do think there can be some wonderful relationships, as well as connections made through fraternities and sororities. But they are not for everyone. </p>
<p>I think we know higher tier sororities have more mixers, and they get to choose who they want to mix with. I don’t think experience is the same, except for bonding and friendship within a house. I am not saying it is right, but just stating the fact, and it is why some girls say they must get into sorority X.</p>
<p>What I meant by “more traditional” is the intensity and format of recruiting for membership. The expense of reruitment for the sororities is quite formidable. And yes…the importance of a bid in some families. MIT has sororities but I doubt that they do the matching clothes and hair flipping thing.</p>
<p>I believe some houses require parent’s income tax returns along with the rush applications.<br>
(They want to make sure they can afford the dues…)</p>
<p>No. At the schools that I am most familiar with living in the sorority is actually LESS than the dorms and/or apartments.</p>
<p>“What I meant by “more traditional” is the intensity and format of recruiting for membership. The expense of reruitment for the sororities is quite formidable. And yes…the importance of a bid in some families. MIT has sororities but I doubt that they do the matching clothes and hair flipping thing.”</p>
<p>Right, but what I’m saying is …why is it “more traditional”? Many sororities started at Northern schools and spread throughout the north in the late 1800s before colonizing in the south. So what makes the heightened intensity of the southern systems “more traditional”? </p>
<p>I believe you basically just made that up, riverbirch. </p>
<p>Rush applications go to the SCHOOL, not to individual houses. You don’t “apply to rush” at a given house. You “apply to rush” at an overall school. </p>
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<p>Do you have a link which supports that? Because otherwise, I’m calling total BS on it.</p>
<p>I seriously question the tax returns. What parent in their right mind would do that? I do know some will google search girls homes and look up zip code information. </p>
<p>Rush applications were sent to the individual sororities at the school, some had to go through the sororities national panhellenic. The more curious aspect to me was the letters of recommendation. I really think that was the most off putting part of it to me and my d. I think it actually makes the rec writer feel more connected, I don’t think the houses really do more than check off a requirement. Like alumni interviews for colleges. </p>
<p>The sad thing is girls believing it will make or break them socially to be in a particular sorority.</p>
<p>As has been discussed on CC before, the importance of those rec letters varies wildly from school to school. I think they are silly because the girls at the house should be meeting the girl herself and forming their own opinion, and what I, a 50 year old woman living 1000 miles away who has never even stepped foot on their campus, think of Mary Sue has nothing to do with anything. </p>
<p>I (and other adult women I know) will write recs for anyone who asks, no matter how tenuous the connection. Recently, a coworker asked me to write a rec for her friend’s daughter. Of course I did. My husband comes into contact with college-age women through his job. If they are interested in going Greek, I’ll write a rec for them. I wish them well and I don’t have any vested interest in what house they join or if they join at all. For all I know, the chapter of my house on their campus isn’t something they wind up liking. Oh well, so be it. </p>
<p>I would like to see some proof of the income tax thing, because I have never heard of that. The sorority I belong to is one of the largest and well known nationally (it is mentioned upthread 
), back in the mid 70’s when I rushed the recommendation form did include a line for parent’s occupation, but that was removed years ago. Nothing about income.
I have filled out rec forms for girls I know. Some have pledged my sorority, some have pledged another house and some ended up not pledging. Like pg, I do not really care one way or another. I also think the recommendation thing is silly.</p>
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<p>And is a major pain, especially for someone like me, who was not in a sorority, therefore doesn’t have as many connections as someone more closely connected to the Greek world. Fortunately, my Ds’ school made a list available of all moms at the school who were sorority affiliated and who were willing to write recs. This made it so much easier, but I still had to work hard for get recs for all houses at my Ds’ schools.</p>
<p>D1 pledged but didn’t really get all that into it and deactivated the following year. D2 has loved it, is very involved, and is an officer for her senior year. </p>
<p>NEVER have I been asked to submit a tax return. That’s just not believable imo.</p>
<p>I have never heard of any house asking for parents’ tax returns.</p>
<p>I agree that there are perceived tiers on each campus, but maintain that fit is far more important than popularity. Most sorority girls have friends and BFs in a wide range of houses, and among non-Greeks. IMHO the tiers don’t really impact one’s experience unless one is hung up on that sort of thing. </p>
<p>The analogy in a previous post to college prestige is a good one. So you didn’t get into Harvard. It may or may not have been a good fit. It doesn’t mean you won’t be happy and have a great experience at Emory, or Lehigh, or NEU. Also, not everyone wants to be in the “top” house. My D will be going through recruitment in January at her Southern LAC. The sorority she is most interested in (I am encouraging her to keep an open mind), is one at the bottom of the top tier, or top of the middle tier. She stands an excellent chance of getting into the perceived “best” sorority if she so desires, but she thinks it might not be as good a fit. They have a reputation for partying hard. </p>
<p>Southern schools, especially large State Us (and some privates like SMU, TCU, Vanderbilt) have a reputation for having intense recruitments. However, that isn’t true of all Southern schools. Also, there are very strong and traditional Greek systems at colleges in all geographic regions. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I suspect that recruitment at schools like Syracuse, Penn State, USC, Nebraska, etc. is rather intense. I think girls in the South just tend to dress up more on the whole (I think it’s weather related). </p>
<p>It’s been 40 years, but I don’t recall needing any LOR, and certainly didn’t know parents’ income nor would I have asked for tax forms. I also thought reputations of sorority houses varied by campus. </p>
<p>Just spit-balling here. I assume that NPHC, NALFO and APIA groups would, in general, be less concerned about what your parents do for a living? Considering that they are more community service based</p>
<p>I had a client whose daughter went through SMU rush and I heard about it 2nd hand. She had LOTS of self-made money but wasn’t connected in the way that was required for letters. He sister took the D under her wing and coordinated all the letters, etc. She said that with the better connected girls there was personalized swag involved in addition to the letters.</p>
<p>And outfits . . . lots of outfits</p>