I agree that going public with the emails might not have been the wisest move. But I have to make a confession - part of me is very happy that these two girls decided to stand up for themselves and to (metaphorically) punch this bully right in the face. Ordinarily it wouldn’t be good etiquette to publish private emails, but I think under these circumstances it’s probably ok.
Who knows, maybe this will bring about just the type of attitude adjustment that “Ashly” seems to need.
There are a couple of weird things about this story, one of the main ones being that I have not seen the first email from Ashly posted. In one of the later emails, Ashly says that she has given up the bottom bunk and apparently she wants some concessions in exchange. Since the initial email in the trail that I have seen published starts out with Ashly saying that she wants the top bunk that has a bed under it, it seems to me that perhaps there was some earlier interaction in which Ashly said that she preferred the bottom bunk.
Also, Guistinna says “me (sic) and Winnie are extremely easy going people.” I don’t think Guistinna could know this if she and Winnie had never met. There is a possibility that Guistinna and Winnie are from the same high school or otherwise know each other, and Ashly is from a different school. It’s unclear to me that none of the three has met.
If an incoming freshman is in a triple with two people who know each other, but whom she does not know, that can be difficult.
It also seems possible to me that there are some cultural differences here. Use/nonuse of email and email etiquette is obviously one.
I am not so quick to dump on Ashly, even though she does come across as demanding in the part of the email trail that was published.
Well…according to one source, one of the “good” roommates says housing wouldn’t switch her unless she could find someone who would switch with her. http://thetab.com/us/ucla/2016/09/14/spoke-winnie-chen-girl-sent-roommate-hell-email-732
It is usually hard to get out of a triple, or to find a person willing to change early on. Here is a link to a report on the two young women who were assigned to room with Ashly:
http://thetab.com/us/ucla/2016/09/14/spoke-winnie-chen-girl-sent-roommate-hell-email-732
It says that the relationship started well with introductory emails among the three. Winnie and Guistinna seem to have been linked on Twitter or Instagram. It doesn’t appear that Ashly was.
Also, Ashly is the correct spelling of a different name than the American/English Ashley. Different culture.
Plus, it’s much more than a venting to friends on social media. The girls are talking to the press, the press has transcripts of multiple back and forth emails. I’m surprised their parents are ok with this. But, I need to remind myself that this is a time of Kardashian culture where everyone wants their viral moment, no matter how embarrassing and public.
I agree talking to the press is not advisable at all.
There is private correspondance deserving of social discretion, and there is a threat.
This is a threat.
I read it as a threat to escalate to the university administration in housing, not as a persona threat.
I think you really need to know the ethnicities of all three people involved to put this is context. I don’t know anything about Ashly other than what she has written. Also, apparently, she does not use social media.
Winnie and Giustinna were too busy getting ready to move to respond to the email from Ashly. I can understand that. However, during the period after the roommate information was given out, Winnie and Giustinna were in correspondence on social media, and Ashly was not. It is unclear to me whether Winnie and Giustinna were corresponding with each other on social media during the two days when they weren’t responding to Ashly.
I understand the idea that Winnie and Giustinna might rarely check email. I had an undergraduate student in one of my classes, who would not respond to my emails (for weeks at a time)–with the class number in the title of the email–and finally connected with him via Facebook. He was on Facebook frequently–probably more than once a day.
The published email chain, like a good drama, begins “in media res.” There was probably more than one exchange that preceded it. Ashly wrote that she had given up on getting the lower bunk. So there must have been an email where she said that she wanted the lower bunk and a reply to Ashly, where that was argued against. Perhaps more.
One thing that I have learned as a university faculty member is that it’s not a good idea to reach a judgment when you only have part of a story.
I have to wonder if the kids first tried to go through the regular channels to get that girl moved out of their room, and then resorted to the “grim trigger” of posting it on social media when the university was indifferent to the issue.
I bet they’re not indifferent now.
?? What do their ethnicities have to do with anything?
The “good” girls don’t sound - from their response - as though they intend to do anything further about this with Ashly. They sound like they’re okay moving forward with her as a roommate. Never do they tell Ashly they don’t want to room with her or that they’re going to take it public since administration won’t do anything about it. So I don’t think they took it public to circle the wagons and get rid of her. I think they took it public b/c that’s what kids do - show the world your business especially if it puts you in a specific light. Now if I were Ashly I would use them posting my emails to get me out of rooming with THEM. Someone needs to back out of this situation if UCLA doesn’t intervene. It’s not going to be good.
Thinking about this a bit more…the whole thing has a cruel edge to it…the “ashly” in the story sounds tightly-wound, its true. But there was no reason to take a roommate dispute – and a really silly/insignificant one – and broadcast it to the world. It was done to embarrass the girl…who cares if it gets them out of the room…it wasn’t a matter that needed to be broadcasted in this way.
If you take a look at this link:
http://www.carbonated.tv/viral/ucla-freshman-email-demanding-wishlist-rude-roomate
there is a high school graduation photo. Perhaps the two women in the front in the photo are not Winnie and Giustinna, and only one of them is, but perhaps it’s Winnie and Guistinna.
It is interesting that the women in the photo are in white graduation gowns, and the men in pale blue gowns. Around here, that would say one thing–private high school. It could be different in California, though.
In any event, it looks to me as though Winnie and Giustinna might know each other, and might not welcome a third young woman.
I don’t know for sure what ethnicity has to do with it, PG, but if Ashly is Chinese-American, Korean-American, Japanese-American, or Vietnamese-, Laotian-, Cambodian-, or Thai- American, I will eat my hat, metaphorically speaking.
The “closet” thing is also a little weird. Since Ashly said that she wanted one of the two “white closets” as opposed to saying that she wanted one of the “two closets,” this suggests to me that there are three closets, and the third one is less desirable. Ashly apparently does not want to get stuck with that.
I just don’t trust the impressions from email chains that start in the middle of the exchange.
The roommate Winnie who did the original tweet is 17. So technically she is not a adult. I really don’t think she thought this would be picked up by the media. I don’t know what housing will do now. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to room with Ashly. I don’t blame them though. If the media hadn’t reported it most people wouldn’t have read about it.
They went to different high schools. Both public. Different colored grad robes for males and females isn’t that unusual at public schools. For someone who didn’t think it would be picked up by social media, she’s sure enjoying posting it publicly to her Facebook profile.
I think a little too much speculation here without much fact.
That’s not Winnie and Giustina together in the graduation photo, near the top of the article linked in #72?
Nope, it’s not. Your suggestion that this was racially motivated led me to the Twitter feed that started the whole thing, where that picture was posted and another girl identified. Also posted were lots of pictures of the girl’s diverse group of friends. Honestly, speculation about racial motivation seems to be completely baseless and uncalled for.
Jeez Louise, what am I doing looking up random teenagers’ Twitter feeds. I need a shower.
I am not saying that anything was racially motivated on the part of Winnie and Giustinna! I did not mean at all to give that impression!! What I meant to suggest is that Ashly may be of a different ethnicity. Her apparent over-reacting might be linked to that . . . although maybe I have it totally wrong, I admit.
I also still have the impression that Winnie and Giustinna may have known each other beforehand. Is that not the case? Maybe one of the two of them formed the impression that they are both easy-going from exchanges on social media after they were named as roommates. I suppose that could have happened. But it sounds as if Winnie and Giustinna had formed some bond already, but not with Ashly.
According to Winnie’s Twitter, today is move in day…
So, pray tell, what ethnicity would her over-reacting be linked to?? ~O)