From Dorm Room to Off Campus Housing

Parent Cafe
1

My D wants to move to off campus housing with 5 friends in the fall semester, 4 rising seniors and 2 juniors. My D will be a junior. A couple of them are currently living off campus in a different area. Off campus housing availability is limited and they go fast.

I would prefer my D stay in the dorm for my peace of mind, but she would like the experience of living off campus. I have shared with her the pros and cons.

For houses they look at, landlords will do one lease, no individual leases. So if one or more kids doesn’t pay rent for whatever reasons, the others will have to pay the difference or try to find someone to fill the spot asap. What other options are there?

And I worry about security being off campus among other things. Please tell me it is normal that I worry.

2

its "normal "BUT its time to let go and let your DD and her roommates figure out how to handle all the various real world problems they may encounter.
Time to land the helicopter, mom.
From a former helicopter mom…

3

My kids both lived off campus beginning junior year. Both lived very close to their colleges in neighborhoods filled with other college students.

One had one lease for the apartment. The other had a lease for her share only. In both cases, they also had to get electricity, Internet, and in one case, heating oil. So don’t forget those shared costs. Oh…and furniture…both of my kids purchased that from the tenants moving out. It was a win/win!

And one kid also had to sublet his place for two summers. The other kid stayed there and worked.

But they both were happy being out of the dorm, and it worked out well.

4

@menloparkmom, I am trying very hard to do just that. I am worried about security the most. My D always tells me I worry too much.

@thumper1, the kids already discussed about utilities, one person will pay the bill, and the others will pay her their share. My D is very excited about moving out of the dorm, I am sure it is a worth while experience. She even thinks ahead of maybe getting some hand me down furniture from other seniors, either free or at a low cost.

5

Totally normal to worry; totally okay for your daughter to do this. Mine lived in dorms the first two years; took over a room in a house near campus (someone else’s name on the lease) for third year; and then organized a group to rent a pair of apartments (second and third floor above Ben & Jerry’s) for senior year (pretty sure these were passed down from rugby team graduating seniors to the rising seniors). It was a learning experience dealing with landlord, etc., but a good experience that has served her well in dealing with landlords during grad school. And, frankly, I thought she was probably safer in off campus (assuming everyone remembered to lock the door) than in a dorm that all sorts of people could get access to.

6

You can worry but it doesn’t change much. Time to let go the reins. It’ll be a great experience for your D and if it’s not then it’s a good learning experience nonetheless. Sounds like the group is already figuring out the particulars of how things will be paid.
My experience says they’ll be a lot happier in an apartment than the dorms

7

Both of my kids moved off campus junior year, but they only had 1-2 roommates and had individual lease. I insisted on it. I negotiated with one landlord who didn’t offer individual leases before. Many people may think it was over kill to have individual leases, but just few days ago, one of D2’s roommates abruptly left the school. Our suspicion is she maybe pregnant. In this case, D2 and the other roommate is not on the hook to get another roommate or pay extra rent. D2 told me that the roommate will pay for the rent and they won’t be getting a new roommate.

I also told my kids to have fewer roommates (1-2) to avoid drama, less noise/party in the apartment, able to keep the apartment cleaner. Talk to your kid about how they would pay for utilities, cleaning, cooking in the apartment. Moving off campus junior/senior year is a good way to transition into adulthood, but it may take some guidance from you. A lot of teachable moment - from contract negotiation to running a household.

8

If it’s any consolation (it probably won’t be), the only personal property theft incurred by my daughters was when D1’s dorm room was robbed a few days before she was scheduled to move out at the end of senior year. Her computer, which contained irreplaceable photos and creative writing, was among the many items taken.

9

Something to consider is that many kids do a study abroad junior year. For that reason, my kids all chose to live on-campus that year so they didn’t have to hassle with maybe paying for an extra half year or subletting. Are any of the housemates planning an abroad.

10

Thanks for starting this thread. I am learning from you all. Ours will stay in the dorms, though trying for the suite or apartment type for next year. Not sure after that. The logistics are tricky for us, as is the issue of furniture.

11

@rosered55, interesting you shared your D’s experience, I was just thinking (in my head and not share with D yet) about her laptop, we can replace it if it is stolen but what about all the school work/assignments and other irreplaceable items on it? I don’t think she backs it up anywhere, maybe she does, I will ask.

She told me her friends who are living off campus all have “chore” list and they definitely will have one. Well, I hope kids will speak up if others don’t adhere to the rules.

Houses they have looked at are 4 bedroom houses, 1-2 blocks away from her campus. It will be 2 singles, 2 doubles for 6 kids. She is friend with all the other 5. Smaller houses and apartments (for 2-3 persons) capacity are much further away. More kids, more potential problems, but as most of you indicate, it will be a good learning experience. Since she has been working at a supermarket for the last 2 summers, she has learned some people skill that may help her.

I can’t imagine 6 kids cooking at similar time in the kitchen!! One big consolation (at least for us), meal cost will be much cheaper off campus. We are paying $2,300 for 14 meals/week for a semester! My D is vegan, she eats a lot of fresh produce and fruits, frozen veggies etc., we may get her a small dorm fridge to supplement.

12

Yes, backing up the computer is very important. Doing so would have saved my daughter much heartache.

Maybe the girls will end up cooking together. But figuring out which food is whose will possibly be an issue. But not impossible to resolve.

13

If you are worried about theft buy her student property insurance. We bought DS13 it mostly for breakage. Only costs about $125 a year. We have used it once when he broke his cell phone. Does she have to rent for the whole 12 months? If so is there any chance the seniors will bale after graduation and she will end up paying their share?

14

In one way, you will have greater peace of mind when she’s living off-campus.

It will no longer be possible for her to be stranded in her college community with nowhere to stay if there’s a snowstorm when the dorms close for Winter Break. Her apartment will still be available, even if her transportation home is postponed.

Often, in college communities, many apartments are rented furnished.

This is likely to be true only if the students have easy access to a supermarket.

Both of my kids moved off-campus as upperclassmen, in two different college communities. Neither had a car. Neither had a supermarket within walking distance. They both ended up spending MORE on food than they did when living on-campus. They got their food at expensive on-campus eateries where you can pay cash, take-out places, and convenience stores.

Nevertheless, living off-campus was a good learning experience for both of them, and they also liked it better than living in the dorms.

15

My kids both spent a fraction of money on food. Both lived within walking distance of grocery stores…BUT they also had friends and roommates who were interested in conserving on money spent.

They did an every other month run to Costco and target for things like toilet paper, laundry soap, kitchen soap, cleaning supplies,etc.

They stocked up with a lot of staples,at the start of each term. DS and his roommates had a huge jar in the kitchen with money in it. Every few weeks, they each put the same amount in the jar. The money in it was used to purchase shared kitchen things…like milk, eggs, olive oil, etc. when the money in the jar got low…everyone added the same amount to it again. It worked for them.

16

It is normal to worry but it is also normal for a good many students to move to off-campus housing for either junior or senior year. Both my kids did semester abroad junior year so they waited until senior year to live off campus. It is definitely a learning experience. I was most concerned about fire safety and making certain that they had working smoke detectors/carbon monoxide detectors. Some landlords are great, others less so.

With older d, one of her roommates inserted a clause into the lease that the apartment be delivered broom clean or they would hire a cleaning service and deduct if from the cost of the first month’s rent. That was a great stroke as the kitchen was one of the filthiest I had ever seen. Exiting students had left all sorts of non-working toaster ovens, rusting bikes, you name it., grimy countertops and drawer pulls, etc. Landlord’s idea of a broom clean apartment was to hire a day laborer and hand them a broom… needless to say that did not fly with the girls. They shared the utility and cable costs, washing machine was actually coin operated, they split the cost of basics like TP, paper towels, cleaning supplies, condiments but each was responsible for their own food items after a bit of drama.

The other issues are with leaf and snow removal. Is it the landlord’s responsibility to rake up leaves and either shovel/plow the driveway or the tenants? If the apartment is in Syracuse for example and the landlord likes in Buffalo, don’t expect them to arrive bright and early to shovel. Younger d’s boyfriend in grad school shares a house with 2 roommates and the landlord drove by and sent them a notice that they were in violation of their lease by not raking the leaves in a timely fashion.

17

One thing to keep in mind with individual leases. If one of the students move out the apartment complex can put in a different student - that you kids do not know.

18

Thanks so much for all your input.

@MichiganGeorgia, I will look into renter/property insurance, I got my S some kind of insurance when he was an undergrad. Lease will likely be from 6/1/2016 to 5/31/2017, the 4 seniors will graduate, way before lease ends, my D will have to find 4 replacements to renew the lease or she can find and join other friends who may have a spot in their off campus housing. So that maybe a headache in the future.

2 of the 6 kids have cars, my D also have other friends who have cars and have given her rides to Walmart/Target type places. They have a chain supermarket on campus, she has to take a college bus to get there.

I am sure they will work out money arrangement for “shared items”, including toiletries, cooking items, other staples, if not, I can always mention to my D. @thumper1, like your suggestion about putting money in a jar.

My D will likely not living in the house for the summer, but a couple of kids will. She has to work at the supermarket near home. She also mentions she will apply for summer research opportunity on campus, mostly for credits and part-time, if she is successful, she will have a place to stay. We are about 45 minutes from college.

We can actually help stock up a lot of her staples, pasta, rice, can beans, oatmeal, pasta sauce, salad dressing, stuff like that. My daughter is very frugal, and she knows her prices from working in the supermarket.

@bookmama22, good suggestion about leaf/lawn maintenance and snow removal. I will mention to D.

19

I remember way back when wanting to move off campus my senior year. My parents were very much against it. I finally got them to agree. But they said they would not pay any more than what it cost them for me to live in a dorm and have a meal plan. I remember eating Kraft macaroni and cheese because it was about 23 cents a box. I would add some green pepper and onion to get some vegetables! Haha. I learned how to budget.

D1 lived off campus all years after freshman year. I believe it was individual lease. She learned many lessons such as-
-landlord, after sophomore yr. said apartment was dirty and would not reimburse security deposit. D1 knew apartment had been thourghly cleaned by roommates AND parents. So she, planning to be a lawyer, took him to small claims court and WON.
-She got so sick of no one cleaning at her second place that she talked her roommates into contributing extra money each month to hire someone to clean every two weeks. It wasn’t that much extra and the person cleaned the common rooms such as bathrooms, kitchen and living room. No personal rooms.

  • D1 was responsible for rent when she did a semester abroad. She found a sublet on her own because we told her she would have to pay for it herself if she wanted to go abroad. We agreed to pay for going abroad up to the amount we paid for her going to school at home. ( Shades of my parents. And we actually spent more but never told her. She isn’t naive. She probably figured it out)

So I support a student living off campus. BTW, S lived in fraternity house junior and senior yr. and D2 was an RA by her own choice.

20

My S1 had to live on campus 2 years, and S2 was encouraged to live on campus 1 year. Both moved off campus when they could.
I had a couple of rules - I had to feel like it was a safe place, and it had to be close enough to walk to campus.
I would have a hard time having 1 lease for 4-5 or more kids. My S1 has always been on a lease for just him. My S2 is in a place with just 1 person, and we did have to do a combined lease. I did it, because I know the parents, and I could afford to pay the entire lease if I had to. I don’t know that I would do it for a 3500-4000 a month rent, which is not unheard of for off-campus houses.
I encouraged my S2 to go with just one person splitting a 1 br apt, even though it was more expensive, rather than 4 guys sharing a 2br (each only had one br, plus the fewer people, the less drama, ideally).
For S1, EVERYTHING (except tuition) we paid for was cheaper than just his room and board on campus, so it was a win for everyone. For S2, we pay more than we would on campus, but he’s happier, and he’s in-state, so overall his bill is much less.
In my opinion, negotiating combined living is a good life experience. Do get insurance. I suggest the $125 or so for college I surance, so claims don’t go against your homeowners.