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Of course ED is a boost.
Many on here refuse to acknowledge common sense.
I liked the description of ED as a tie-breaker. It’s not going to get you in if your application falls short but it can push a borderline case into acceptance, or make a good app a better one.
I interviewed for my alma mater for many years.
MANY people (guidance counselors, kids, parents) do not understand what the words “ED is a boost” actually mean.
Fact- for most unhooked kids, they aren’t getting in during RD, and they aren’t getting in ED.
Fact- For most unhooked kids, the adcom’s aren’t sitting around having a massive debate about "well, we might have taken her in November, but she applied RD so she’s a no. " In fact, there isn’t a massive debate at all. For most unhooked kids, there is either a strong case to be made to admit. And in the absence of that strong case, the kid gets denied. This is not a court of law where there must be a preponderance of evidence, or beyond reasonable doubt, etc. There is either a strong case to accept the kid or not. Which is why when a college tells you “we make the same decisions in November that we do in April” you can believe them- because a kid who does not have a strong case for getting in, ain’t getting in no matter when they apply. Please note- many of the kids I’ve interviewed do not believe this to be true. Because their parents and guidance counselors have persuaded them that ED is a way to raise the dead, the ultimate Hail Mary pass. And it is not.
Fact-For kids with hooks-- applying ED is a great deal if the school is in fact the number 1 choice. Being a decent tennis player IS NOT A HOOK. This does not mean that marginal applicants can get in ED- they can’t. And this does not mean that the only way the hooked kid can get in is via ED because that’s also not true, except for being a legacy at Penn where it’s clear- you want legacy considered? You need to apply early.
You guys are going round and round and round. I haven’t heard anything from the OP that suggests the kid is hooked. Good, smart kid who is going to go to a great college. Which one? I don’t know. Can good smart kids with #$%^ essays get into great colleges? Happens all the time. Is THIS kid getting in to a great college with a $%^& essay? I have no idea.
Continue.
whop whop whop
Sounds like a helicopter parent. Why don’t you ask him when he is going to write them. Agree on the dates. Then hold him accountable to the dates. No need to micromanage every step of the process.
I think parental nagging is counterproductive – it simply adds to the stress, which makes writing the essay even more difficult. And the reality is the essay is usually NOT the high-stakes endeavor that it is portrayed to be. But magnifying its importance is a sure-fire way to create writer’s block.
Yes, every once in a while a kid writes an amazing essay that will draw attention to the app in a positive way; and I am sure there are essays that are so terrible that they cause a student who might otherwise be accepted to be rejected. But most the time the essays are not going to be the driving force. College admissions is NOT an essay contest – the main value of the essays are that they provide extra bits of information that might reveal factors that are important to the college in making a determination, that aren’t already obvious from other information in the essay.
Back off and let the kid own the process. I think an agreed system for noting deadlines and a parental promise to be available for proofreading & feedback if asked is enough.
A year before my daughter was applying to colleges, she had a blog – I enjoyed reading her blog posts, and I commented to her, once, that a particular post would be a good topic for a college essay. I never mentioned that again. But, a year later, the same opening sentence and topic resurfaced as the primary common app essay. Most of the rest was rewritten --but the point is that I’d planted a seed, and when it came time, that ended up being the seed that bore fruit. But I was not invested in it – I probably would have forgotten all about it if it hadn’t ended up being used. My kid had a busy life as a high schooler and was involved in all sorts of activities… so realistically anything could have ended up being a jumping off point for a good essay.
I’d suggest that you allow him to take a week off of school to write the essays. He can catch up on schoolwork after these essays are done.
They need to like you for their college when they read it. Nope, not a writing contest, not expository, doesn’t need to be intellectual, etc. But needs to show the personal traits they want to see. You need to figure what that is.
It’s about you. Not about granddad, the dog, a problem relative, 3rd grade, why your major, etc. A simple narrative can do it. A final point that speaks to the admissions readers. But “show, not just tell.”
Yes, an essay that makes you seem less or lacking perspective, maturity, etc, can backfire. No, a bang up essay can’t overcome other unsuitability or mismatch.
Agree with calmom that, at this point, we need to be their allies, not their nags. Many kids just aren’t ready for an Early app.
It was easier for my son to write his main essay after reading some of the successful essays published in the NYTimes and other places. Sometimes we forget how difficult it is to differentiate yourself in a college essay when you are inexperienced and don’t even know who you are differentiating yourself from. Many of us didn’t fully realize how our experiences as children were different from others until we moved away from home and got know people with different experiences in college.
IMO, this is terrible advice.
First of all, take the pressure off. The reality is that colleges know that many essays are coached and therefore, their importance has decreased. It is okay to write an essay that is good enough. It doesn’t have to be outstanding, it just cannot be terrible.
I know a kid who went to a top school and wrote about blueberry muffins. Just echoing the advice above that essays do not have to be about curing cancer in the future.
I also know a kid (mine) who wrote essays the night before the deadline and got into an Ivy. Some kids need a deadline.
The best thing you have done is tell your son he doesn’t have to go to a top school. In fact, tell him he doesn’t have to go to college at all.
Leave him alone, basically. If he does go to college, he will have to rely on his own motivation, and the time to start that is now. Have confidence in his ability to do this and try to stay out of it. I know it’s hard.
If he really does need help with motivation- and that’s not clear-get a third party involved, paid or not.
Finally, my kids found that looking at photo albums were really helpful. I don’t know if people have those anymore (this was 10 years ago) but looking over one’s life can stimulate topics, including those related to growing up.
I am here to commiserate with you. I ham having the same problem at my house. Despite the reminders during the summer, the common ap essay still has not been written. There is one excuse after the other like I am working on the school-specific essays first or we are going to be writing them in school and there is a specific format they want us to use. I am so tired of this. Can we fast forward to March 2020 already? When your kid is stubborn, the college application process is torture. She is driving me nuts.
Whether to sign an NLI is up to the student. It is NOT required to get a scholarship, but getting a scholarship of some amount IS required to sign the NLI. Some of the very top recruits do not sign and leave their commitments until the last minute.
All D1 sports, except Basketball and football, now have a continuous signing period from mid Nov to Aug 1. Basketball has a split signing period with a week in Nov and then Apr 15-May 15, and Football has a couple of days in Dec and then Feb-Aug.
Many students apply to colleges before signing the NLI and sign the NLI without having a formal acceptance to the school. If you don’t get into the college, you are released from the NLI.
There is a lot of good feedback in the thread here. I was using some of the ideas already but also started using some of the ideas in the thread here. It’s working and the essays are starting to flow. One good thing is if you do the UC app, Common app, Stanford, and U Chicago, the rest can just be a re-use (with some tweaks for the school specific essays). Stay patient and positive. Good luck.
They are making the Common Ap essay and assignment in English class, why they didn’t do this last year is beyond me. She already got pointers from the teacher and thinks she has a topic. A first draft is due within the next few days and she is working on that. Thank God. I think it will get done, if not by October 1st, definitely by the EA deadlines for the schools that offer and hopefully by mid-October with rewrites. I have decided to back off and just accept that it is not getting done on my time table but it will get done in time.
- Let this be his issue. If he is awesome, he will do well no matter where he goes. Have him apply to the State U. Tell him you just want him to have one application in so he has a place to go. They admit mostly on SAT/ACT and GPA. If he doesn't want to apply to other private schools that is fine.
- But! Tell him to imagine it is April 1, and other students are hearing if they got into various schools. Ask him if he would wish he got into a certain school? or at least had the chance?
- Talk to the GC and see if the English teachers have an assignment to work on essays.
- Don't put pressure on him to go to a Top 20s. Tell him you want him to have the options he wants..whatever it is. "If you don't want to apply to Dartmouth, then that is fine. If that is why you don't want to do the essay..no issue."
- Ask him to schedule a time to work on essays..." I know you have homecoming and Joey is having a party soon...when do you think you could finish these essays?
- Realize your son is doing what every other kid is doing.
This, even my kid who liked writing essays, waited until the first week of January to write his final optional essay, because “he wanted to enjoy writing it”. It was for the school he ended up attending and one of his reachier choices.
I think it can be hard to write a good essay in a vacuum (such as in a school assignment, weeks or months before the app is due. I know my daughter had a class assignment for the common app essay, and whatever she wrote for the class never went anywhere else. In the process of filling out college apps, after the student fills out the info about coursework and EC’s, there is a more of a sense of the overall message or theme that the app will convey – and I think that is when the main essay may emerge. So for any kid with writer’s block, maybe a better start would be to fill out the rest of the common app – (and other apps, for schools that aren’t using the common app).
It sounds like he’s burned out. Seriously, kids have been admitted to mental hospitals because of pressure to get into a small handful of schools they think will be some kind of ticket to prosperity. It’s not worth it. There are well over 1,000 perfectly good and fully accredited universities he can choose from. Even more, with his grades and scores, he could get a full ride scholarship just about anywhere. Just have a heart to heart talk with him.
Calmom, you just nailed it. Writing their essays was just a theoretical task until there was practically no time remaining. I think both kids got more of a sense of what their application told about themselves after it was 90% finished. That’s when they sat down to write autobiographical essays.
Our son began his with a sentence about the Three Gorges Dam project in China, and how that topic – far from the USA – became a case in his policy debate that year. He generalized that to what he learns from debate, on topics far from his everyday experience. And he expanded that into his other extracurricular activities and interests.
Our daughter took the approach of explaining why she liked to watch and talk to people who are looking at her art products. What she learns, what art means to her, and why making art is aimed at other people, not mainly an egoistic endeavor.
So yes, under the gun, near the end of the application process, the applicants can lay out their self-descriptions, their aspirations, and how they like to spend their time. This brings the summaries of extracurricular and curricular activities together.