FSU to phase out academics

Parent Cafe
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<p>This one’s for you parent2noles. A little too close to the truth IMO: <a href=“The Onion | America's Finest News Source.”>The Onion | America's Finest News Source.;

<p>SARASOTA, FL—Bowing to pressure from alumni, students, and a majority of teaching professors of Florida State University, athletic director Dave Hart Jr. announced yesterday that FSU would completely phase out all academic operations by the end of the 2010 school year in order to make athletics the school’s No. 1 priority. “It’s been clear for a while that Florida State’s mission is to provide the young men and women enrolled here with a world-class football program, and this is the best way to cut the fat and really focus on making us No. 1 every year,” Hart said. “While it’s certainly possible for an academic subsidiary to bring a certain amount of prestige to an athletic program, the national polls have made it that our non-athletic operations have become a major distraction.” FSU’s restructuring program will begin with the elimination of the College of Arts and Sciences, effective October 15.</p>

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<p>considering that likelyletters have been sent to athletes already, not so far fetched…</p>

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<p>Too funny!</p>

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<p>Not that clever and not very true. Really just a cheap shot IMHO.</p>

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<p>Oh wow. Clever and witty. Wonder why this wasn’t in the Alumni news circuit?</p>

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<p>wow, touchy</p>

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<p><strong>ROFLMAO</strong> Hey!! Our h.s. would be a GREAT feeder school, as we’ve knocked out all academics for knocked UP girls in the yearbook! :D</p>

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<p>Actually to become a target of the Onion is an honor. </p>

<p>It means FSU’s arrived. Pretty soon I’m going to start posting ‘FSU Rising Rapidly’ threads like the UM and UF folks do.</p>

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<p>

Good idea! This will be a good test for someone writing for one of the school papers–a parody of a parody. Hope someone will rise to the occasion.</p>

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<p>I think it’s closer than you realize: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=238123[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=238123&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;