funny editorial about college admissions

[laris]

<p>[Editor’s</a> Column | New Jersey Jewish News](<a href=“http://www.njjewishnews.com/njjn.com/051508/edcolDearStudentsAnd.html]Editor’s”>http://www.njjewishnews.com/njjn.com/051508/edcolDearStudentsAnd.html)</p>

[DonnaL]

<p>

As the number of applications to Reach U. has swelled and the process has become ever more arbitrary and sadistic, we have adjusted our acceptance rates accordingly. In recent years we have received approximately 74,000 applications for our 1,200 slots. In response to demand (from our Board of Trustees, that is) we have reduced the number of available slots to 900.</p>

<p>Nevertheless, we encourage many different kinds of students to apply. Perhaps you are a talented filmmaker who struggled in calculus. Or an average math student with a special interest in journalism. We promise: Every application to Reach U. helps boost our U.S. News & World Report ranking.

</p>

<p>You’re right, it is funny.</p>

[JustAMomOf4]

<p>

A representative of our financial aid office will break down our tuition and housing package, and discuss the various aid and loan options available to students. To save time, we have attached a list of Frequently Asked Questions, including: “Did you accidentally add a zero to that number?” and “Does that figure include all four years?” and “That can’t be right, can it?” and “Are you freakin’ kidding me?” Emergency Medical Service personnel will be standing by.

</p>

<p>Hilarious!</p>

[Lafalum84]

<p>I forwarded this link to a bunch of people. Thanks for my laugh for the day.</p>

<p>"Campus tour
One of our impossibly chipper undergraduates will meet your group outside the Administration Building for a tour of our state-of-the-art campus. The tour will last approximately 17 hours. You will begin at the newly renovated Student Campus Center, which is the East Coast’s only full-size replica of the Palace of Versailles. "</p>

[barrons]

<p>LMAO. Thanks…</p>

[FLVADAD]

<p>Funny. Thanks for sharing.</p>

[vballmom]

<p>

we require that candidates take both the SAT with the writing component and the ACT without the writing component. And vice versa.

</p>

<p>Too funny!</p>