<p>“Grandma Got run over by a reindeer” used to be my favorite silly holiday song. But a new song has emerged this year that is, IMO, hilarious, if you like tongue-in-cheek, dry humor. This one [Merry</a> Christmas Exclamation Point (Jon Lajoie) - YouTube](<a href=“http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km9iS2tcRZE]Merry”>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km9iS2tcRZE) still makes me chuckle. What are your favorites??</p>
<p>That reminds me of someone who posts on this forum who has lots of cousins!</p>
<p>An Irish song, “Mrs. Foggarty’s Christmas Cake”, and also “Dominic The Donkey”.</p>
<p>I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas!</p>
<p>[Walking</a> around in womens underwear by Bob Rivers (1993) - YouTube](<a href=“- YouTube”>- YouTube)</p>
<p>The Hannukah Song that Adam Sandler did on SNL…</p>
<p>I always chuckle when I hear the Twelve Pains of Christmas song.</p>
<p>Like this?
Anything but the chipmunks.
[Dr</a>. Demento Presents: Greatest Christmas Novelty CD:Amazon:Music](<a href=“http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00000348G]Dr”>http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00000348G)</p>
<p>I am an elementary school nurse and, for the past four or so years, the school secretary, receptionist and I end the last day of school before Christmas break with the following song which we sing over the intercom:</p>
<p>(Sing to the tune of Winter Wonderland)</p>
<p>Children scream, they’re not listenin’
When they go, we won’t miss ‘em,
In all of this pain, we try to stay sane,
Workin’ in an elementary school </p>
<p>Christmas comes, they’re excited,
Though our nerves, they’ve ignited,
They’re off of the walls, they run in the halls,
Workin’ in an elementary school </p>
<p>In the lunchroom we can hear them yellin’
And we know that they are really wound,
Someone hits, the other says, “I’m tellin’”
And that is when our heads begin to pound </p>
<p>Pretty soon we’ll be restin’
Cause our nerves, they’ve been testin’
We’re happy it’s clear
It comes once a year
Christmas in an elementary school!</p>
<p>Im openmouthed that you are allowed to say " Christmas" in a public school.
;)</p>
<p>This one is my favorite. We learned it in school when I was a kid. It’s to the tune of jingle bells.</p>
<p>I heard a reindeer hoof
Then Santa dressed in red
Came crashing thru’ the roof,
and landed in my bed!
I thought it was a dream,
but quickly did I wake,
as soon as I heard Santa scream
“I want a piece of cake!”</p>
<p>Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus
You are much too fat!
I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat
Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus How much do you weigh?
I’m glad I’m not a reindeer
That has to pull your sleigh!</p>
<p>He got up off the floor
and said “How do you do?”
I said “my back is sore,
my head is black and blue”
“So sorry” he replied,
and then he asked my name.
He offered me a ride, I said “No thank you just the same.”</p>
<p>Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus
You are much too fat!
I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat
Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus How much do you weigh?
I’m glad I’m not a reindeer
That has to pull your sleigh!</p>
<p>I heard a “ho ho ho”
the sleigh was in the sky
but it was moving slow
and wasn’t very high
It wobbled in the air
I hoped it wouldn’t fall
Said Santa chewing cookies “Merry Christmas, one and all!”</p>
<p>Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus
You are much too fat!
I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat
Oh, Santa Claus Santa Claus How much do you weigh?
I’m glad I’m not a reindeer
That has to pull your sleigh!</p>
<p>My all-time favorite (guilty pleasure) funny song is Cheech & Chong’s Christmas song.</p>
<p>How can I forget Stan Boreson?
[Stan</a> Boreson & Doug Setterberg - I Yust Go Nuts At Christmas.wmv - YouTube](<a href=“- YouTube”>- YouTube)
[Stan</a> Boreson Vinter Undervare (Winter Wonderland - sic) - YouTube](<a href=“Stan Boreson Vinter Undervare (Winter Wonderland - sic) - YouTube”>Stan Boreson Vinter Undervare (Winter Wonderland - sic) - YouTube)</p>
<p>LOL #9, #11 would probably not be allowed today: too “weightist”</p>
<p>I just heard Mr. Grinch on the radio-- I love the clever lyrics and imagine it was fun to write all those insults:</p>
<p>You’re a mean one, Mr. Grinch.
You really are a heel.
You’re as cuddly as a cactus,
You’re as charming as an eel,
Mr. Grinch.
You’re a bad banana with a greasy black peel.</p>
<p>You’re a monster, Mr. Grinch.
Your heart’s an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders.
You’ve got garlic in your soul, Mr Grinch.
I wouldn’t touch you with a
Thirty-nine and a half foot pole.</p>
<p>You’re a vile one, Mr. Grinch.
You have termites in your smile,
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile,
Mr Grinch.
Given the choice between the two of you,
I’d take the seasick crocodile.</p>
<p>You’re a foul one, Mr. Grinch.
You’re a nasty wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks.
Your soul is full of gunk,
Mr Grinch.</p>
<p>The three best words that best describe you,
Are as follows, and I quote
Stink!
Stank!
Stunk! </p>
<p>You’re a rotter Mr Grinch
You’re the king of sinful sots
Your heart’s a dead tomato splotched with moldy purple spots
Mr Grinch</p>
<p>Your soul is a appalling dump heap
Overflowing with the most disgraceful
Assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.</p>
<p>You nauseate me, Mr Grinch
With a nauseous super naus
You’re a crooked jerky jockey and,
You drive a crooked hoss
Mr Grinch! </p>
<p>You’re a three-decker sauerkraut
And toadstool sandwich,
With arsenic sauce!</p>
<p>Merry Christmas from the family - Robert Earl Keene</p>
<p>"Momma got drunk and daddy got drunk, at our Christmas party
They were drinking champagne punch and homemade egg nog,etc…</p>
<p>Great song!</p>
<p>Are you familiar with Dominic the Donkey? One of my neighbors is from Italy and during the holiday season has a life-sized statue of a donkey pulling a cart as part of his outdoor decorations. It cracks me right up.</p>
<p>If you haven’t yet listened to the song in the first link-- try to make time to do so. Its priceless.</p>
<p>How about chipmunk singing, “All I want for xams is two-front teeth, two-front teeth…”</p>
<p>My daughter used to listen to this over and over on her little Fisher-Price record player: <a href=“What do you get a wookie for christmas ( When he already owns a comb) - YouTube”>What do you get a wookie for christmas ( When he already owns a comb) - YouTube;
<p>Dominic the Donkey! I always heard it on the radio growing up and it’s my favorite silly Christmas song.</p>