gap year success. . .a good reminder

Parents Forum
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<p>my junior age son seems less interested in college than his older brother was at the same age. he has a love of languages, spent a semester in germany last year, and see’s himself eventually living overseas. after reading this article i’m inclinde to incourage him to pursue options other than college after he graduates high school. any others with gap year success stories?</p>

<p><a href=“http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/15/jobs/15pre.html?_r=1&oref=slogin[/url]”>http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/15/jobs/15pre.html?_r=1&oref=slogin&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>I just posted one under another thread about perhaps the same article. Let me know if you didn’t see it/can’t find it.</p>

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<p>morandi, that is a great article. Thank you for posting the link.</p>

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<p>Both of my sons were extremely bright kids who also were academic underachievers. Both said they wanted to go to college right after high school.</p>

<p>I went way out of my way to help older S apply to colleges that he liked, including doing apps for merit aid. By helping him, I mean that I did virtually all of the research for colleges, and then stood over him while he did the apps. He then went to a college that he loved (and also had virtually full merit aid), and flunked out because he partied too much. At 24, he has never returned to college.</p>

<p>I learned my lesson, and did not stand over younger S to make sure that he got his apps in on time. He missed the deadlines, but within weeks had lined up an Americorps position for himself in our hometown. He loved community service, and the position was perfect for him.</p>

<p>He lived at home, paid rent ($50 a week so that he developed a reasonable idea about how far a stipend goes), and followed the same rules we’d have imposed on an adult longterm guest. He matured a great deal, too. </p>

<p>He got some wonderful skills including grant writing. He got to represent his agency at meetings where typically he was the youngest person present, organized events, and went on two business trips for training, including an out of state one that he had to fly to.</p>

<p>He learned a great deal about what he likes doing, and what he doesn’t like doing. He also saw the connection between school and work, such as learning that just as one has to write reports for school, one has to do the same thing for work, and his supervisors weren’t as tolerant of lateness as were his teachers (He almost hadn’t graduated from h.s. because of the backlog of late lab reports and similar homework that he had to get in at the last minute). </p>

<p>Because his grades had gone into such a slump his senior year, H and I told him that we wouldn’t pay for his first year of college. S managed to get some merit aid to the LAC of his choice, but also had to take out loans – large loans-- to pay for that.</p>

<p>In college, he handled with great maturity having a difficult roommate, and also was active in several ECs (including some activities that he had never tried before) that included facilitating a weekend leadership workshop for a club, being on the board of a campus-wide organization, having a major role in some fundraising events, and organizing a team that made a film for the campus movie fest. He also worked a parttime job, and managed to end the year with a 3.3 average, not bad for a guy whose h.s. gpa was about a 2.7 unweighted.</p>

<p>This summer, he is working parttime at the place where he was an Americorps volunteer, and has been given the task of organizing a one-week summer camp. He gathered a team of volunteers, and planned the program, and got flyers, an application, and a publicity article completed within less than 10 days. </p>

<p>I’m convinced that the gap year was a good choice.</p>

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<p>Our younger D will be entering the U of Maryland, College Park, this fall, after taking the past year as a gap year. (Her older sister just graduated from the same school.) D, the younger, surprised us a few weeks before HS graduation by informing us of her unhappiness with school, and basically declaring that she didn’t want to go to college, but wanted pursue other things, like her art, and starting a business. We took a deep breath, didn’t fight it, and started thinking and talking about what could happen and how it could work. After the initial shock wore off, and D graduated from HS, she agreed to do research into what type of school she might want to attend. She had ruled out art school before, but wanted to look into them in more depth. She wanted to start a T-shirt design business with her friend, etc. I wrote up an agreement, spelling out what we would agree to provide in the way of financial and other support, and what we expected her to be doing for the year. This list included working at an actual job in the real world. D didn’t disagree with any of the points, but probably wasn’t that thrilled at having it so formalized. A big part of the agreement was open and regular communication about what she was doing and what directions she was considering. She did get a job a local clothing store, which she didn’t particularly like. She stayed with it for several months, though. She continued to do babysitting, pet sitting and dog walking in the neighborhood, which provided even more income. And she started tutoring the HS daughter of a neighbor, at the neighbor’s request. This turned out to be the most valuable job, and the biggest surprise. D loved it. She ended up tutoring 3 students through the school year, and will continue this summer, including doing SAT prep for them. She will be greatly missed by her students and their parents when she goes off to school. She has done a great deal of reading and self-study, and has met some interesting people. For a time she was volunteering at three environmental organizations, practically working full time. Her life/education goals have gradually evolved, and she is now planning on majoring in Psychology with the goal of becoming an alternative therapist and teacher. She is excited about UMD; she spends time on the campus and pores over the course descriptions. We are very excited for her and definitely feel that taking the gap year was the best thing for her.</p>

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<p>I graduated from high school at 16. My parents had heard about gap years from their European friends and thought it would be a good idea for me as well. They suggested I spend a year in France living with a French family studying French. I was not averse to the idea although French had always been my worst subject. The result was that I learned to speak French fluently - the subsequent languages I studied (German and Italian) came much more easily, and I learned a lot about French and European culture I would never have learned just being a tourist. I got to see an election (Pompidou died in office while I was there.) I got to pick grapes, mushrooms, nuts and wild greens (country place and avid foragers for a family). I learned a lot about architecture (also through the interests of the family I lived with.) In fact I ended up going into architecture. Later I came back to France the summer before I graduated to do research for my senior thesis. At another point I translated a French book about indigenous housing in Senegal for one of my professors. My gap year experience has enriched my life in countless ways. </p>

<p>Both my brothers also spent a gap year in France before college. Each had very different experiences, but also found it very positive.</p>