<p>We are currently collecting for the cleaning lady at my firm. She has had a terrible year of misfortune and ill health. You wouldn’t believe how that $10 or $20 per staff member adds up. Also, the attorneys are usually generous based on their incomes, so this lady (who is lovely and needs it) will come up with a couple of thousand dollars from this floor alone. If everyone said that their contribution didn’t matter, she would get nothing.</p>
<p>Aww, 2016BarnardMom, <em>I’M</em> crying now! What a great thing that lady did! What a wonderful memory you all have, too.</p>
<p>Great way for me to start my day-thinking of others.</p>
<p>In January (not December), I calculate the tip and add an extra $ or two in the restaurants I go to. Why January? I suppose it’s because I’m a contrarian of sorts. Maybe it’s because it’s cold.</p>
<p>The other day, I was at Sam’s Club. I saw a young woman with two very young kids. They came to see their dad at work (he was in the food court). It was 4:30 and they were tired and looking hungry. Heard the mom say she and they would wait on the bench for dad to finish his shift. I handed the mom a coupon I had for a free slice of pizza and drink, as well as two pumpkin bars from a box I had just purchased, to help tide them over while they waited for the dad. The mom seemed touched and kids were happy they were going to get some food, without having to wait for the dad to finish his shift.</p>
<p>I still remember about 20+ years ago when H and I were traveling with our young kids. We had gone to the zoo and then caught the trolley back to the hotel. We got a phone call from a stranger, asking if we had lost a black waistpack. They found it and were leaving it at the front desk of our hotel and refused to ID themselves or allow us to give any reward. They just asked us to please consider “paying it forward.”</p>
<p>I love this thread.</p>
<p>Many years ago, when our children were in elementary school, we were in the midst of a move - just one home to another in the same area. On the day of the move, I loaded my younger two in the car for breakfast at McDonald’s before school. My husband had left earlier to take some boxes to the new house. I realized once I got to McDonald’s that my purse was in the other car but no problem … I had about five dollars in my jeans pocket. When we ordered, I explained to the kids that Dad had left with my money so they needed to split a hot cakes and sausage and milk and orange juice. I wouldn’t eat. After we sat down with the order, the sales clerk came over and explained that she had overheard me. She had talked to the manager and they would like to give me a free breakfast and whatever else the kids would like … another milk? orange juice? She thought that their dad HAD LEFT WITH OUR MONEY … a much direr need than me leaving my purse in the wrong car. I explained and thanked them. We didn’t need the extra food but I’ve had a soft spot for that McDonald’s ever since.</p>
<p>As for helping others: the librarian’s husband at the school where I taught got severely injured … touch and go, then time in the hospital and then rehab. Once it passed the touch and go stage, she returned to school but left at the end of the day to spend the afternoon and evening with him. The other three teachers on the team and I told the librarian that we would bring a lunch for her each day for the long haul. We divided up and each took a day. Then on Fridays we each brought a few salad ingredients, made a salad bar and ate with her. Our lunches were sometimes simple and sometimes not (a hot lunch to microwave at her convenience.) An after school snack was included with the lunch … brownie or cookie or fruit … something to take to the hospital with her. We heard over and over from her that year what a difference it made to her. It was embarrassingly easy me for to make that extra lunch on my day and bring some salad fixings on Friday. The appreciation truly exceeded the effort and made me glad we thought of it.</p>
<p>Ignatius…I love that lunch idea.</p>
<p>ignatius, I love super-practical, concrete help like you gave the librarian.</p>
<p>Oh I love giving people coupons they can use. I sometimes feel like a stalker if I am at a store like costco and have their coupons someone can use. Now though I think the discounts get automatically applied so I don’t need to coupon stalk anymore. </p>
<p>Las summer I got a call from someone on Lake Michigan asking if I’d left a cooler and a backpack. turns out DS was up there visiting and had forgotten to put these items back in the car, leaving them in the parking lot! I was able to reach him and he was able to get friends to retrieve the items. I insisted on getting the kind woman’s name and sending her a cookie bouquet. We were so appreciative.</p>
<p>What a kind, sharing and giving community cc is. And full of great ideas.</p>
<p>That’s a very touching story, 2016BarnardMom! That lady’s kindness made me feel all warm and fuzzy. </p>
<p>With everyone always talking about how selfish and heartless human society has become, it’s nice to hear about the better part of human nature.</p>
<p>jym626,
Until you mentioned it upthread, I had completely forgotten that I spent hundreds of hours volunteering in our local high school, working with the seniors applying to college. Mostly, I spent time with those who came to me for essay help, but I also was able to answer almost any other question they had, and helped them with scholarship essays. This is a very academically low-performing district where the guidance counselors do not have the time to spend with individual students the way I did. To me, this was just a normal extension of using what I have learned here and through some courses I took! </p>
<p>If anyone has the time to spare, there are some schools and organizations that will be delighted to have help. I found it to be extremely rewarding.</p>
<p>To those of you who have volunteered at high schools to help with college admissions – how did you get started? It’s something I want to do and I feel like I have a lot of knowledge but I am not a teacher/guidance counselor or parent (just read here bc I used to post as a student) – so I don’t have access to schools. I don’t imagine with school security being what it is these days that you can just waltz up to a school wanting to volunteer because who knows if they need volunteers and they may wonder about your motives? Thoughts?</p>
<p>To the med school guy – give it a rest. What part of “kindness of STRANGERS” is so hard for you to get? Hate to break it to you but you benefit from your D going to med school – you get to say she’s a MD; you get to rest easy once she’s done knowing she can provide for herself; you get her thankfulness for paying etc. When you give $10 to a cabbie/waitress, you never see them again and get no imminent benefit; all you can do is hope that money helps make their life easier even if it means they get to just buy 2 extra items at the grocery store. (Sorry to the rest for this rant – maybe this is normal behavior on this board but I don’t get why one would derail a perfectly nice thread.)</p>
<p>aj725,
Start by checking out an organization called College Summit. They look for volunteers for their summer workshops which are located on college campuses and bring in inner city high school kids for essay help. It’s basically an incredible 4 day “boot camp” for these kids and they crank out a very credible personal essay for their college apps within that time frame. Volunteers to be “Writing Coaches” for these students only need to have a B.A. degree. I worked with some people who were teachers, but many were just volunteers whose normal “day jobs” were working for all sorts of companies. There is fast-paced training the day before you start working with the kids.</p>
<p>Not to derail, but since it’s come up-if you’re going to be helping students of color apply to colleges, please learn about HBCU’s beyond the common thought that they are “less than”. Nearly every black student at DD’s school has applied to at least one HBCU over the years-some are very highly regarded in the black community. Also, they tend to understand that test scores are not the be-all, end-all and accept lower scores than other schools, and many give free rides for higher scores. Also, many have a pre-freshman summer program for admitted students, as well as offering continuous support throughout the year for struggling kids. As well, there are hundreds of scholarships that are available only to black or Latino students. You want to look these up too. And there are specifically black college fairs. We’ve found the reps to be beyond accommodating to students as young as 6th grade who are interested in higher education. These fairs are not huge zoos, but smaller affairs where you actually get time to speak to reps.</p>
<p>I can’t stress enough-on CC I don’t see a lot of support for these schools, but lots of disdain. Most do not deserve this.</p>
<p>Interesting discussion about college counseling as I decided that I’d like to pursue this as well after several people encouraged me to do so. Not sure if it’d ever be something I’d pursue in a paid environment but I’d love to transition from all my volunteering in my kids’ schools to helping high school kids in need through the process. A certificate program is available through several universities online and I’m starting the first course in January. Not sure how truly necessary it is for what I’d like to do but it will make me feel better to have some more formal training. Will definitely look into College Summit though.</p>
<p>Just wanted to thank the person who started this thread. It has really inspired me to REMEMBER to be generous. We volunteer, donate things, have adopted families for the holidays, etc. but that little act of kindness (extra tip, etc.) is something I MEAN to do but, in the craziness of each day, I can forget. </p>
<p>I do remember dh relaying the story of flying through O’hare in the middle of winter years ago and being delayed–there was a chance his flight would be cancelled and he’d be there overnight. He overheard a fairly young boy (maybe 10) on the phone telling his mom he was hungry and afraid. Dh gave he and his sister money to get food and hung out with them until he was certain their flight did take off (it did). </p>
<p>I’m headed out now…I’m going to look around for an opportunity to make a generous gesture! Happy holidays everyone!</p>
<p>Picking up on sseamom’s post #94, that’s the population I mostly worked with. I had to get past my biases to understand the importance of HBCU’s. Our salutatorian was admitted to two Ivy League schools as well as some other highly ranked universities. She chose to go into engineering at an HBCU which had awarded her their top scholarship and a free ride. Her family couldn’t pass that up. That HBCU graduates more African American engineers than any school in the country. Back to your regularly scheduled wonderful thread.</p>
<p>I know the school you mean, momof3. Last year DD and I met a woman who passed up Harvard Law for Howard and was the subject of a bidding war by firms on Wall St. when she graduated. She couldn’t say enough about the place.</p>
<p>To continue the kindness theme-H was telling me about a time a small gesture literally changed his life. His father had passed away when he was only 6 and his mom was a maid, so there wasn’t much money, but H wanted to go to a Catholic high school in town. It was affordable enough in the early 80’s that his job as a paper carrier would have covered it, with some creative bill-paying. But his check had not gone through when it was time to take the admissions test, for which there was a fee.</p>
<p>He decided to go anyway and ask if he could come back to pay the fee. A neighbor saw him waiting for the bus and offered a ride and asked what was up. H told him and the guy paid the test fee. H got into the school and that in turn got him into college. He believes that $20 or so literally changed his life, that he would not be where he is today as a result. He parents never even graduated high school. Another case of $20 making all the difference. And the man never accepted a payback.</p>
<p>I love this thread and it’s helping me remember to be kinder to people. A couple of years ago,the “cash register lady” in the building where I work found out her daughter died, and she literally did did not have enough money to fly down to where her daughter lived, and see her grandson. We put the word out, and within a couple of hours over a thousand dollars was collected, maybe even more (it may have even been 2500). It was enough for both her and her husband to fly and stay in a hotel if necessary. Sad part of this was her co-workers were threatened that they’d get in trouble if they participated in any way. Someone did kindly give us her address and phone number, and we were able to get the money to her. She didn’t get fired, because she worked there quite some time after that. Say what you want about government people, but we pulled together quickly for her.</p>
<p>I think that my most important gift this season will be reading this thread. CC people are just simply the best.
I hope to read more even past Christmas --which means I need to do something more myself.
A number of you have posted such heartfelt stories. Since this should never turn into a competition I want to say Thank You for the big, medium, and Super that you pulled off.
We really are an amazing collection of people.</p>
<p>My husband is a Deacon in our church and he was part of a surprise for a mother and her two teenagers who had a really hard year that included the sudden death of their husband/father and, like many others in our neighborhood, destruction at home thanks to Superstorm Sandy. Earlier in the season the youth group surprised them and sang Christmas carols and decorated the outside of their home to bring them some Christmas cheer. My husband had to make up some story to make sure they were home but I’m sure he’ll be forgiven for that!</p>