So me and this girl have been talking for about 6 months or so. Currently, she’s a senior in high school and I’m a freshmen in college. I’ve been trying to push for a relationship but she told me she wasn’t ready for one so I’ve been just talking with her, being there for here and such so that when she’s ready, I’ll still be there. We never get to really hang out since her parents are strict…or so she tells me. I don’t know, sometimes it feels like she doesn’t try make plans with me but I know for a fact she goes out with her other friends. Anyways, today I found out that some other guy came to her house and asked her to homecoming via Snapchat Story. I honestly don’t know how to feel right now. I mean, I guess you can use the words betrayed and jealous. I don’t know what to do. Should I continue chasing her or is it even worth it anymore? A part of me tells me that I shouldn’t be feeling this way as we were never a couple, but I don’t know, it felt like we were one. My mind is a mess right now and I could really use a second opinion. I’m open to any questions or inputs, thanks for reading.
“Betrayed,” as if she promised you anything. Come off it…she’s not yours to own or control.
You’re in college. You have plenty of other options available! Go forth and explore!
About a week ago, I jokingly talked about asking her to homecoming and she was like, “You can’t, you’re in college”. I went forward to say about how I’d be pretty jealous if she went with another guy but she promised me that she’d say no if anyone had asked her.
You’re right about college giving me a lot of options, but currently, I feel so bad. I don’t know, I felt like I just wasted my time with her. UGGGH. This is stupid.
Dump the minor.
You’ve been “waiting” for something that was never promised. She’s having fun in her last year of high school. Let her have her fun. But you need to have fun too.
Why would you even want to go back to a high school environment? She doesn’t sound like she’s waiting around.
She is taking advantage of you as a back-up. Move on.
Seriously though? You’re not even there and you’re like “If I can’t have you, no one can”???
So what if the time was wasted or wasn’t wasted, it’s over and you can CHOOSE to move forward with your life.
Sounds like she likes you as a friend, but doesn’t want to date you. A cliche, but it really happens. You didn’t waste time if you enjoyed the time you spent with her – not all interactions lead to a romantic relationship, but that doesn’t make them a waste of time.
She is not into you. Look for someone else in college.
Homecoming is just one date. And think of the money you will have saved.
As a parent, I discouraged my daughters from dating guys in college. They are in a different place. You have more freedom than HS’ers do. You should look to date girls in your college.
Honestly you have no right to be jealous. There was never a relationship.
You’re in the big leagues now. Don’t sweat the Homecoming rejection – it’s for high-schoolers anyway.
She’s not into you and hasn’t been for a while. Move on.
Not quite sure why you kept pursuing a relationship with a high school girl who clearly wasn’t interested. The fact that you feel like you wasted your time with her suggests that you were only interested in her dating her, not in spending time with her or being her friend. Clearly, she’s not on the same page and hasn’t been for a while. Move on with your life. It’s probably much better for you to get into a relationship with a girl who goes to your school anyway because you’ll be around each other more and are both in the same place in your life.
With all due respect, look up the definition of Nice Guy, and then stop being that guy. You’re not entitled to a girl’s affections just because you want a relationship. She an autonomous person who gets to have her own thoughts, feelings and desires independent of yours.
Take this as a growing experience. Go out and make new friends, meet new women. Think of them as people, treat them as such–don’t feel entitled to anything–and marvel when an equal, reciprocal relationship develops! You’ll be the better for it. Nice Guys are the WORST.
Bro, do you even college? These are the problems of a high school freshman.
The mistake you made was in thinking that when she was ready for a relationship, it would be with you. I don’t think that happens much except in movies. I’ve known a few people who wanted to marry their significant other but, after a couple years (or more) of dating broke it off when the significant other still “wasn’t ready.” In most cases, the significant other ended up meeting and marrying someone else. It’s not that they didn’t want to marry, they just didn’t want to marry the current girlfriend/boyfriend.
But this girl wasn’t even your girlfriend. She made it clear to you that she wasn’t interested in dating you, and now that she’s interested in dating she doesn’t owe you anything just because you feel like you were in line first. Relationships don’t work that way. It’s unfortunate, but it happens. The best thing you can do is limit your contact with her and focus on making friends at your college.
Focus on more important things. Dating isn’t that important and at the end of the day she doesn’t like you like that.