<p>We all have a time, a moment that we will all remember. The “bad” ones show up in therapy. The good ones, like getting that first job, a college entrance that we didn’t expect make my life whole.</p>
<p>Last night I had that moment: Since we don’t go to temple my family goes to the table. This year the guest list was Mr. Ellebud, all Ellebud’s kids and their s os. I went into the kitchen and as I started walking the dining room I stopped. I saw the people in that room, talking…eating and laughing. I literally stood there for a minute taking it in. My dining room took on a glow that I truly have never seen before.</p>
<p>I was totally, happily stunned. Does anyone else have a memory to share?</p>
<p>I will have that happy moment on December 26 when we will celebrate Christmas…all of us together…for the first time since 2009. Can’t wait (we are having Christmas on December 26 because that is when DS arrives!).</p>
<p>One of my most recent golden moments was not too long ago. DS was home from college for the summer. DD and her SO had driven down to see us. The five of us sat in the family room talking about nothing in particular and laughing a lot. At some point I mentally paused to take it all in: my two young adult children, the really SO (that may or may not one day be part of our family–my best guess is yes), DH and myself just doing what families do. When the kids are babies and young it’s hard to imagine moments like this: family life when they are young adults. DH and I love being with them. Personally I think this time in their lives is as exciting as when they learned to walk, etc. It’s exciting and fun to watch who they are becoming as adults. I love those moments. </p>
<p>I have lots of golden moments! I think it’s because I’ve learned to take a “time out” during many occasions to see with a more objective eye like a photographer (which I was at one time). Just a moment to play observer and enjoy the moment and feel happiness in a room. See what’s happening, how people are relating. Cherish it.
And for the “bad times”–they pass too–good to stay objective there also.</p>
<p>My memory is twirling around with my baby in our home that was under construction. I was so happy that we would get to raise our kids in such beautiful surroundings. Kind of a bittersweet memory now, considering how my boys are struggling, but I still cherish it.</p>
<p>For as long as I can remember, on weekend mornings all three boys would pile in to mom and dad’s king bed. We would read and watch TV (cartoons when younger, ESPN as the boys got older). The tradition lasted all through the high school years…even as S3 grew to about 6’3".</p>
<p>Fast forward to a year or two ago, when for the first time in a long time all the family (now including my DIL) were together at our home, in a new city. We had a lovely Shabbat dinner on Friday night. Saturday morning, I came out of the bathroom to discover S3 camped out in the middle of the bed as he had done at 2, even though he was now 20. A few minutes later, S1 and DIL showed up to say good morning–and climbed in and propped themselves up on the pillows, and a few minutes later, S2 joined the party. I was so thrilled, especially that DIL felt secure enough to join in!</p>
<p>umm, yeah…it was really too crowded, but it was wonderful.</p>
<p>The look on my wife’s face when she realized that the “dance class” turned out to be a surprise party to celebrate her 10 years of cancer-free living, a day that at one point we thought we would never see. It was such a great moment that I don’t even like to talk about it for fear of something spoiling it.</p>
<p>One of the most special moments of my life was a year ago this past May. I had talked the family into a trip following the youngest’s college graduation. Because of school and summer work schedules for him, we had not taken a family vacation during his years in college. I had missed doing that. Plus I knew that D was in a serious relationship and likely to be getting engaged and while I was happy about that prospect, I knew that family vacations would likely be a different ball game in the future.</p>
<p>I suggested a splurge (for us) “celebratory family trip” to my H. Best move I ever made. We all discussed trip options and decided on Italy, as none of us had ever been there and we all were enthusiastic about the idea. </p>
<p>Our first evening in Florence was absolutely magical. My son still teases me about how we were walking the streets together, and H and I were exclaiming about how we felt like our family had been dropped into a movie. Spending time in a piazza with the statues, the music, the gelato … it was heaven on earth. </p>
<p>It was such a wonderful and special time for our family. Both kids were doing well: son had just finished college, D was employed in her field in a city she loved, and told us during that trip to expect an engagement (the wedding is this month), I had survived an aggressive breast cancer – we felt so blessed.</p>
<p>Plus it was so nice for us parents to see our kids interacting with each other as young adults. They would sometimes do more physically demanding activities just the two of them, and we would reunite for meals. </p>
<p>That following Christmas my son gave me a photo calendar featuring pics from our trip to Italy for each month. He well knew how much that family trip meant to me. It is one of my most joyous memories.</p>
<p>My H and I take a walk everyday in the afternoon /evening and while we are still youngish, ( in our 50’s) Ive had friends who have lost their sig others through death/ divorce and often I feel intensely cognizant of how short life is & being grateful to be able to do something as simple as go for a walk with him.</p>
<p>From long ago, I have distinct memories holding a sleeping baby and then falling asleep myself and the sheer perfection of the moment. This happened with my son when he was about 7 weeks old and with my daughter when she was just a few days old. Both times were special enough that I somehow remembered to make a mental image of that bliss. Most recently, DIL was away in January and S flew into Nashville before he and D both made their way home for the weekend. Although I love my DIL, with her not around to feel out of the loop, we had some moments where both kids started to reminisce about memories the 3 of us shared and I was both laughing until I cried and crying realizing how precious and rare that experience was. </p>
<p>Thanks for the reminder, ellebud. Hope your wedding comes off in a way that it becomes another of these magic moments for you. Love all of these stories:)</p>
<p>This is a sort of wackie golden moment or 45 moments.</p>
<p>My husband, myself and son had flown home from the other coast and when my husband got the van, something had gone wrong and once he was inside the van, you could not open the doors or the alarm would go off. Nor could he turn off the van and get out without setting off the alarm. </p>
<p>My son and I had waited to get the luggage and my husband called us to tell us the predicament. So as he drove up, he opened all the windows but we knew we could not open the doors. </p>
<p>My son put his hands together to give me a lift to climb in the window. Then he threw all the bags one at time through window and climbed in himself. So were off. We had 45 minutes to figure out how to get out the van with our bags without setting the alarm off at now 1 am.</p>
<p>We chatted, we problem solved, we are an engineering type of family. Son scoured the Honda book looking for something to tell us how to disarm the alarm. We arrived home but without an answer from the book. </p>
<p>We pulled up, windows all opened, van still running. Son threw all the bags out of the van and climbed out the window. I climbed out the window leaving husband in running van. We had decided that son would pull open the hood ready to disconnect the battery as soon as husband closed all the windows, turned off the van and opened the door.</p>
<p>The alarm began but was soon muffled when the battery cable was pulled.</p>
<p>This was the most fun we ever had had on a family drive. :)</p>
<p>October 91 with my husband, our two young children holding our hands, sandwiched between standing knee deep in the Atlantic Ocean at Outer Banks North Carolina. Sun setting, warm night and family all together. I remember thinking I would never forget this moment and I havent yet. </p>
<p>Those two young toddlers have grown into incredible young adults and moved into the world. My husband is gone and I suspect I’m the only one that has that preserved memory. It was literally and truly golden.</p>
<p>Mine will be this May. I’ve had chronic medical conditions for twelve years that have really interfered with college. I had to take two separate medical leaves, totaling four years. </p>
<p>Soon ill be graduating from a top school with not one, but four degrees (one BS, three MS). I applied to colleges ten years ago. It’s been a long time coming.</p>
<p>One of my most golden moments is enshrined in this forum, when my older son was accepted to a college… NINE years ago!! (It is amazing how our lives have changed while on this forum… ) At the time I wasn’t sure any college would take him. It was truly a “golden” moment. I expect another golden moment when he graduates this December… unless it is next May. It has been a journey!</p>
<p>I am a “mental photographer” so I have soooo many moments stored.</p>
<p>DD s HS graduation is one of my favs.
Age 21, from a wonderful special needs school. I can see DD surrounded by her friends and fabulous teachers, just immersed in the glory and ordinary elation of a “typical” graduation.</p>
<p>The future did not include college for the vast majority of these young adults.
Still, watching their joy and excitement of moving into the world was priceless.</p>