grade my essay please!! 1 example only...

<p>I was only able to fit in 1 example. If I do something like this on test day (I mean I only have 1 example but like I tackle it kinda well... or so I think), what would my grade be?</p>


<p>In business, the term "personal brand" describes how companies define themselves and differentiate their products from those of other companies. People, too, are often advised to develop a kind of personal brand or style—to make themselves stand out from other people by developing unique characteristics. Nowadays, people who want to be successful in school, at work, or in their personal relationships must emphasize their differences from their peers in the same way that companies emphasize their differences from their competitors.</p>

<h2>Assignment: Do people succeed by emphasizing their differences from other people? </h2>

<p>In our world today, competition is fierce. There are a lot of talented individuals whose credentials go beyond what’s necessary for the jobs they apply for, whose work ethic is beyond reproach, and whose determination to succeed is unlike any other generation’s. Today, being merely at par with the others is not enough to reach the top of the hypothetical ladder of success. Today, one must stand out and offer something special to do well.</p>

<p>Take, for example, the reality TV show, American Idol. In the show, Simon Cowell and the other judges constantly emphasize the importance of being original and bringing something new to the table at every performance. There were countless contestants who were brilliant singers but lost because they lacked that personal brand or style. In Season 8, Lil Rounds was one of those. She made it to the top 7, and the judges would repeat time and again how she has such strong vocals, but that she doesn’t do anything different from what the artists before her had already done. In the music industry, and the entertainment world in general, individuality counts for a lot because out of all the people who could carry a tune, one must catch the people’s interest. To be able to do that, one must be different. </p>

<p>Three of such individuals are Andrew Garcia, season 9 runner-up Crystal Bowersox, and Season 8 runner-up Adam Lambert. During Hollywood Week, Andrew sang an acoustic rendition of Paula Abdul’s Straight Up. It sounded completely different, much more mellow and soulful. He received praises from all the judges, and Kara Dioguardi even called it “genius”. Crystal was also another strong competitor not only because of her strong vocals but also because of her original sound. Week after week she would sing a song that she would twist a bit as she remains true to her unique voice. Randy Jackson would always comment on how he loved her originality and Simon never said her performances sounded “karaoke”. In the finale, Ellen DeGeneres even said that she has been trying to think of someone who sounded like Crystal, and she couldn’t think of a single one, which is a good thing. </p>

<p>Lastly, Adam Lambert was well-remembered for how different he was compared to the usual contestants, from his fashion style to his glam rock / punk rock falsetto voice to his theatrical performances. Despite the diverse genres the show picks each week, Adam was able to excel as he took each song and, in Kara Diogruardi’s words, “flipped it” to be different. In Motown Week, when the judges thought he might be in trouble because such songs were different from his signature style, he garnered a standing ovation from legendary Smokey Robinson. Because of his versatility and uniqueness, Adam made it to the top 2. His first released album even debuted at number 3 in the Billboard 200. </p>

<p>Such examples demonstrate how originality can bring success. If the aforementioned contestants simply played it safe and gave performances that were nothing out of the ordinary, they would simply be forgotten. As the Idol judges would say every week, one has to be in it to win it. To do so, one needs to develop his personal style and, through that, literally bring us all to the edge of our seats and beg for more.</p>

<p>I like it, but usually there should be at least 2 or more examples.
I'd give it a 9.</p>

<p>how do i improve it? anyone else...?</p>