Grade my Essay

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Prompt: Is conscience a more powerful motivator than money, fame, or power?</p>

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2

<p>[URL=&lt;a href=“http://www.mediafire.com/imageview.php?quickkey=d118dwv7w48g01b&thumb=4][IMG]http://www2.mediafire.com/imgbnc.php/5a23928b9e5662bc69d25f2c85fef6ce5351bfd3a8982be98237b29ee157a10c6g.jpg[/IMG][/URL”&gt;http://www.mediafire.com/imageview.php?quickkey=d118dwv7w48g01b&thumb=4]

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3

<p>By the way, don’t give me a zero just because I used a pen.</p>

4

<p>Bump10char</p>

5

<p>4 out of 6
Some grammatical errors, but interesting historical examples.
1st example w/ speculators & farmers doesn’t quite apply; the farmers made their own decisions to sell the bonds.
Elaborate more… you’re on the right track, but need to go that extra step to make sure your ideas are fully explained. Focus more on quality than quantity. Details such as the year is not as important as the why.
You should also emphasize why the other side of the argument is wrong, w/ statements such as “If Stalin was affected by conscience, wouldn’t he have spared the millions who died of starvation from his blockade of Ukraine?” Something like that… Just my $0.02.</p>

6

<p>^
Hmm, I was under the impression that, for the SAT “essay,” I don’t have to consider counterarguments…</p>

<p>Farmers were coerced into selling their bonds at low prices because they needed money to buy food. They did not have a choice.</p>

7

<p>well that is what Mike Barrett says, and he was known to be a bad guide on SAT essay back when he wrote and published Grammatix</p>

8

<p>Is AcademicHacker’s guide also bad? He also doesn’t advise bothering with counterarguments.</p>

9

<p>i dunno but here is my $.02 on SAT Essays</p>

<p>You finish the conclusion w/

  1. Counterargument
  2. Lesson learnt
  3. Potential consequences if your POV were not followed
  4. Call to action
  5. An unexpected value</p>

<p>I’ve always finished my essays with 1. and 5. and it worked wonders for me
I’ve scored 12’s on October, November, and December–yes three consecutive times</p>

<p>so trust me, the method stated above will work.</p>

10

<p>I’m sure it will, but I’m also pretty sure that it is not necessary. As the MIT study has shown, length is the best determinant, as long as the example paragraphs are coherent and support the thesis</p>

11

<p>I have never stated a counter-arguement although I only got a 10.</p>

12

<p>I’d give it a 4/6. To address the counterargument issue, I believe that addressing those is unnecessary. On the SAT essay, you’re a defense attorney, ramming home your side of the case throughout the paper. While attorneys are supposed to address the other side’s argument, you don’t have time to do so. Just back up your position really strongly. That being said:</p>

<p>-Your first example doesn’t quite fit. In and of itself, it doesn’t work, and you don’t do much to tie it in. The other 2 examples worked better.
-There were some grammar and spelling errors in the essay.
-Tie in the topics to your thesis more strongly. How would conscience have made speculators, BP, and Stalin act differently?
-Try to incorporate more high-level words if possible. Myriad and malfeasance were used well, so you’re on the right track.
-All in all, this was an above average essay. It was solid and had its good moments, but it wasn’t anything special. I’d expect most graders to give a 4, with the occasional 5. A 3 (or below) or a 6 would genuinely surprise me.</p>

13

<p>What score would you give it if the 1st example was as good as the other 2?</p>

14

<p>^It’d be closer to a 5/6.</p>