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1

<p>Would I look like an idiot for taking this point of view?</p>

<p>“Is a conscious a more powerful motivator than wealth, fame, and power?”</p>

<p>The idea of a conscious, that we as humans possess an innate entity which is able to persuade us towards a just or “good” act is a comforting coping mechanism brought forth in a transient world of misguidance and trivialness. Though there are a few isolated incidents of righteousness, I must, unfortunately, attest that man’s most driving forces consist of wealth, power, and fame.</p>

<p>In June 2009, philanthropist John McKnickles was features on a news program on ABC, which flaunted his “good” work. One would assume this man to be a righteous individual; a true trailblazer for “goodness.” However, we must take a closer look. John McKnickles was an extraordinarily wealthy man who lived an extremely opulent lifestyle. He was also the executive of his million-dollar company. Clearly, John had command over two of the three human motivators; only “fame” was left to achieve. Perhaps by committing himself to such righteous acts with underprivileged citizens of the world, John was simply fulfilling his yearnings towards notoriety. This pattern, (though it may be flawed) can be attributed to many “good” events. The man who jumps into a swirling river to save a young child, does he do it for sheer conscious goodness, or perhaps for fame? Or might he even do so in fear of the societal backlash one faces after refraining from such an act?</p>

<p>In addition, we must define, with absolute certainty, what a “good” act should be. For centuries philosophers have questioned our conscious acts. Can a “good” act simply be something that makes you happy, or must it benefit society in someway? Are the invents of the Industrial Revolution good, conscious, acts? While it decimated our forests, it surely made out lives much easier.</p>

<p>Problems run ramped in our world and one can only postulate that a conscious is either a figment of our imagination, or something that is dwindling in prevalance. After all, how can a conscious be the main motivator for humans, if some don’t even posses it? Surely, Ted Bundy and Adolf Hitler lacked this supposed innate entity.</p>

<p>(PS. John McKnickles totally doesn’t exist haha)</p>

2

<p>I’m not a perfect essay scorer so i can’t give you a number, but this doesn’t seem that controversial. Usually people say to avoid religious or political standpoints, but this doesn’t seem to be one of them. However, your example of John Mcknickles isn’t as good as it could be. Instead of hypothesizing about his evil intent, you should say that he later confessed in some kind of interview that he gave charity for the fame. Also, your third paragraph seems really misplaced.</p>

3

<p>Yeah, this was my first shot at an essay. I’m not very pleased.</p>

4

<p>It’s also pretty naive. Those “controversial” questions have been asked many, many times before. Research philosophy.</p>

5

<p>Consider learning to spell and and improving your grammar. This is also hardly a stance unknown to most educated folks. The readers just grade on the quality of the essay - if you argue well and write well, by the standards they employ, you will get a good grade. It won’t matter to them whether your view matches their moral outlook.</p>