<p>Mattistotle, note that this is not his personal statement.Therefore, It does not have to be personal nor does it have to appeal to emotion… colleges do not see the essay.</p>
<p>I think it’s pretty well written</p>
<p>arrghhh… i just realized i could have used hitler that would have been a great example… oh well… i think historical examples are good for this type essay… as for the other type they might do on the SATII writing (the "i truly learned courage when…) a personal example would be better…
btw… this is an essay for teh SAT II writing test… it is not your college app essay! lol… i don’t think it has to be personal just well written…</p>