not on purpose TBH
i was thinking that since it happens so commonly, it was CC group think. Clearly, there are different opinions.
for example, what about when we think debt is involved? is that any different?
Ditto. Edited to add per your addendum, that there is in my opinion a difference between a family who says they can pay versus debt. Some debt people are comfortable with and can manage. Massive debt, it seems some may not understand what they are getting into.
I generally agree with the exception being someone shooting for MIT. I have heard two different MIT admissions reps say that MIT expects a student to always take the most difficult option available to them at least for core subjects.
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Reminder to all: If someone posts something slightly off topic in relation to another idea in the same thread, it doesnât necessarily warrant removal. (Edit: if itâs something related to college and not personal commentary or opinions about what other people are posting.) An occasional off topic post here or there is fine, unless it shifts the whole conversation away from the main topic.
Example: If someone responds to the original idea, but also mentions how maybe the Fiske guide could have assisted with a list, then the whole thread evolved into discussing the Fiske guide, THAT would be off topic, and would probably be split into a new thread. It is okay if the conversation meanders sometimes. If there is an off topic post that you feel is TOO off-topic, please flag it for review.
Reminder also, there is rarely a reason to call out any one individual with the intent of drawing negative attention. Flagging is the best option when in doubt about a post. Thanks for your cooperation.
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I think it depends on whether there is an indication that grad school is in the kidâs future. If the kid is planning on CS or engineering or something where grad school is unlikely, then no, I donât think finances should be addressed. But if a student is already considering grad school (law, med, etc), then I think itâs a thoughtful practice to ask the family if they would consider using any savings on a lower cost option (which could be the lower of Options A & B that theyâre considering) for grad school.
Some parents have a pool of money for higher ed, and once itâs gone, itâs gone, but it can be used as long as possible. Some families plan to support kids for undergrad only, no matter how much it costs, but grad costs are entirely on the kid. Other families intend to fully support their kidsâ higher ed for no matter how long and how much. But since many families arenât aware of the costs of med/vet/law school and the lack of scholarships for most grad students in those fields, I think itâs entirely appropriate to ask families if theyâve thought about the issue. For some the answer will be yes, and weâre fine with our plan. Others will say, hey, we hadnât thought about that and it might become part of the decision-making process.
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When I said a thread can meander with an off topic post every now and then, it should at least be related to something to do with college and not with how other CCâers are doing things.
Iâve set the thread on slow mode until tomorrow.
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People are entitled to make their own decisions as to how to spend their own money. If a poster says it is not an issue, IMO itâs polite to accept/respect that statement.
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Before something happened here, you started to discuss debt and whether that is different. Worth a discussion IMO.
Generally, I am not in favor of loans/debt for college. There are some exceptions, however.
When the student is staying within federal loan limits (approx. $28k total for undergrad):
- When all of a studentâs college choices would require taking on loans, including the studentâs in-state public colleges
- When use of the loans would permit a student to have a residential college experience vs. a commuter educational experience
- When there is an extraordinarily fabulous fit at a particular institution and all other options are poor fits (though this does raise questions about the quality of the original college application list).
If parent loans are required (i.e. beyond the federal loan limits), then I think there are fewer exceptions. Possibilities would include:
- A parent has been named as a beneficiary in a deceased personâs will and they are waiting for probate to receive the funds
- A parent is working on a contract that will be paid after the tuition is due to a school
- Essentially, parent loans might be used as helping with the timing of the payments/cash flow, but with the expectation that all loans would be paid off very soon.
But apart from these exceptions, Iâm generally opposed to debt for college.
To be a bit more concrete, here is an (imaginary) example:
My kid likes Clemson better than Alabama but Clemson will require loans. Alabama it is. My kid gets into BU (loans) and GW, but GW gave enough merit aid so there wonât be any loans. Kid might prefer BU, but GW it is. My kid with autism gets into Penn State (no loans) and Mercyhurst (loans). My kid would strongly benefit from all the supports and programming available for students with autism at Mercyhurst, and would stand a decent chance at getting lost in the system at Penn State. Mercyhurst it is.
How this relates to group think, Iâm not sure. But I suspect that many would be in agreement with these positions.
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Sometimes a student posts âdonât worry about the cost, help me decideâ under the mistaken belief that they can borrow the entire cost themselves. Itâs very important to point out that their freshman loan limit is actually just $5,500.
Financial aid offers, particularly when loans are involved, can be very confusing. Posters want to dig into the actual budget details to help the student/families figure out what the viable options actually are and to understand the details of any loan obligations if needed.
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Given the enormous problem of student debt in the country, and the number of people who apparently regret taking on such debt, I think it is always worthwhile to point out the drawbacks.
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One can discuss posts elsewhere in general terms, but it is not appropriate to call out users from other threads, either directly or indirectly. You can dispute their posts in that thread, but naming them here or quoting posts violates ToS.
Should we further challenge an OP if they claim they have money for college? Or should we answer the question.
If the average family pays $30k-$40k per year, might a portion of the population have actually saved or inherited or have access to $150k or more?
I realize there is a major debt issue, but college is particularly meaningful to some families and especially in some cultures.
I am all for digging in hard on the people who claim a need or show inconsistencies around their financial logic, but are we being off-putting when they clearly say - we got it.
Seems CC consensus (group think) says everyone deserves further qualification. I think it should be more of a half and half.
0 offense meant to anyone on this issue.
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I agree with you. Asking once seems sufficient. I expect many families on CC do indeed have sufficient funds
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Is there a FAQ somewhere on the site about budgeting and paying for college? Maybe point people to a FAQ instead of taking up a lot of space on the thread talking about finances after they have indicated that they do not have financial concerns. Like,
âNo financial concerns.â
âGreat! Just be sure to read the paying for college FAQ (link)â
I do notice that sometimes when people say they have no financial constraints, it does turn out there are financial constraints, or they are planning to take loans, or they havenât talked to their parents, or donât know how much college will cost, or the cost will cut into availability of funds for grad / med / etc.
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good idea on faq or equivalent.
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I disagree with this statement - not everyone is budget minded - so in this sense there isnât group think. Some people are offended if you are budget minded (some of the group I mean) if someone says they are good. And yes, sometimes an OP too.
Sometimes itâs pointing out - you may be good but did you know you can get the same thing for half the price, etc.
I think by trying to set a standard - as it seems you and others are suggesting - is group think - when itâs the kind of thing (group think) that should be avoided.
If a poster asks about specific colleges, seems reasonable to talk about those colleges. Plenty of other places to talk about finances. There is a whole FA forum for that.
And thatâs fine for those posters who choose not to comment.
And itâs unrealistic that someone who starts a chance me or asks about a college, that theyâd go to yet another thread to learn about another concept.
The fact that this thread (group think) is happening - tells me - the group (meaning posters) is seeking it - and to me, thatâs dangerous.
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Completely disagree. I give the posters/readers here the benefit of the doubt, that they have the ability to read around the site and find the information they may find helpful.
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