<p>Haha, Splashmom! Happens to me often too. :)</p>
<p>DS has been sharing a dorm room at college with one other boy for 2 months. The roommate has a photo with himself and a girl in a frame on his desk. Also about 20 photos taped on the wall, the girl appears in several of them. </p>
<p>On move-in day I met roomie’s mom, I asked if they had other children and she told me he was an only child, so I know he doesn’t have a sister</p>
<p>So I said to DS, “I assume that’s roomie’s girlfriend in the photo on his desk?”
DS: I dunno.
Me: What about all those photos on the wall?
DS: I dunno.
Me: Does roomie have a girlfriend?
DS: I dunno.
Me: You’ve roomed together for 2 months! What do you talk about?
DS: Sports. And homework. But mostly sports.</p>
<p>My favorite question from all four of my males: Where’s the ketchup? And my response: The same place it’s been for the last 19 years. Do they actually look first?</p>
<p>3bm103, I’m convinced it is a Y-chromosome linked trait :)</p>
<p>“Where’s the ketchup?”</p>
<p>Translation: “Would you bring it from wherever it is and put it down next to me?”</p>
<p>N.B., TheDad does not use ketchup.</p>
<p>===</p>
<p>I tend to try to solve problems as well. I’ve been told, I don’t want you to solve my problems, I want you to say, “Aw, there there…” and put your arms around me.</p>
<p>Sometimes I catch myself and make as if I’m holding a cue card and read in a stilted voice, “Aw…there…there…”, at which point I get whapped.</p>
<p>===</p>
<p>Regarding vision, mine is deteriorating. I can still read body language but only in Braille.</p>
<p>Okay. That was actually very funny.</p>
<p>If my H asks “Do we have any jam?” it means “I would like you to get the stuff and bring it to the table, preferrably with a knife, or better yet just put it on my toast” I found that it is less stressful for me to go the full service route rather than start a lecture on how to locate the $%^&@ jam in the kitchen.</p>
<p>Ques.: Are all women crazy?</p>
<p>Ans.: No.</p>
<p>Qualifier: Not at the same time anyway</p>
<p>re post #7 – I have yet to buy a car where H didn’t participate in the process, but I can relate to this in other ways. I’ve actually gotten to the point that I just insist I told him something some time ago, whether or not I remember telling him. It’s a safe bet the HE doesn’t remember anything I tell him anyway!</p>
<p>A lot of this is examined in “You Just Don’t Understand,” by Deborah Tannen. A very good read. I have learned to respond to my wife’s general complaints with “do you want suggestions or do you want to vent?” Most of the time she wants to vent–she knows what the solution is, she is looking for empathy.
Another good example, from Tannen’s book: A man and woman are driving down the highway, and an exit with restaurants is coming up. The woman says, “Are you hungry?” The man says, “no,” and keeps on driving. After the exit, the woman says, “I would have liked to stop and get something to eat.” The man says, “Well, why didn’t you say so?”</p>
<p>I’m reminded of the time my S asked me if we could go shopping. I said, sure, and then noticed in the store that he was shopping for jewelry, I assumed for a girl.</p>
<p>Me: So, who is this for?
S: _____.
Me: How nice. Is it her birthday?
S: No.
[later, in the car]
Me: If it’s not her birthday, is there another special occasion?
S: Uh huh.
Me: Um, is it some sort of anniversary?
S: Uh huh.</p>
<p>Until that moment, I had suspected but did not know for sure that they were boyfriend and girlfriend–and it was their six-month anniversary. Fast forward two years, and they’re still “going out” as seniors. He still doesn’t mention the A word, but at regular intervals, I find him scrounging in the closet for gift wrap.</p>
<p>Aaaaw. That’s really sweet.</p>
<p>DD called when I was out.
H: DD called. She was upset about a grade she got in English.
W: What did she get?
H: I don’t know.
W: You didn’t ask her? What did you say?
H:Nothing.
They talked about other things, but I was upset that she had called for comfort, and DH just brushed it off as no big deal. :mad: I did talk to her later.</p>
<p>Clueless, Perhaps you should allow your husband to borrow your screen name…</p>
<p>Along the lines of jessiehl’s post…</p>
<p>I’m more emotionally guarded and less overtly affectionate than my boyfriend, just to skew the statistics. At the beginning of our relationship, he’d speak honestly about his doubts and second guesses, while I kept mine to myself (my reluctance to talk about Us and Feelings nearly caused him to break up with me before I finally spoke honestly). He’s cautious, responsible, and attentive to detail; I’m spacey, easily distracted, and have no concept of personal safety (I answer the phone while riding my bike, wander around New York alone at night, and almost get myself killed every time I cross the street). However, we’re both extraordinarily neat. He remembers to call his parents and gives them detailed updates about his life, including me; mine only inferred that we were dating after I notified them I’d be spending part of Thanksgiving break with his family in Connecticut. He lets me know when he’s upset or stressed, and I listen and hold him until he feels better; I internalize everything, pretending to be unaffected. He worries about my health; he was the first to say he loved me. I will concede that he spends football games explaining the rules to me (but that’s hardly a fair example considering that I’m European :D) and thinks Halo 3 is “the best game ever,” but other than that, I don’t think very many of the gender stereotypes apply. :p</p>
<p>^ soon it will transform from a gully, then to an arroyo, then a canyon, then a gulf, and finally an ocean. </p>
<p>I’ve been at the gulf stage with DW for a very longtime. Its getting salter and filling in.</p>
<p>Hubby and I are at a gulf stage, but there is a frequent ferry service going back and forth.</p>
<p>H bought me a nice necklace with a cute pendant which I wear every day.</p>
<p>Me: You would not believe this, honey, I was at Costco today and three different people told me that they liked my necklace!
H: Necklace?
Me: Yeah, the one you gave me for my birthday last year.
H: I gave you a necklace? When? Darn, there goes my Christmas gift idea!</p>
<p>LOL, BunsenBurner!</p>
<p>Last Christmas my H and I went to a Yankee Swap with people in his company. Yankee Swap: Everyone brings a wrapped gift and puts it under the tree. Before the “swap”, everyone takes a number from a hat. The person with number 1 opens a gift. He holds it. #2 opens the next gift but he/she gets to choose between his gift or the gift that #1 chose. This continues, down the line. At the end of the swap, #1 gets to either keep his/her gift, or trade for whatever has been opened. My H opened last and was very pleased because he traded for a nice bottle of wine, but then #1 took decided to swap for his gift, a photo frame. It was called a “My Mr.Wonderful” photo frame. You can push a button and a syrupy voice comes on saying one of the following messages. I thought that my H was going to choke on his drink when he pushed the button. We were all in stitches…</p>
<p>Mr. Wonderful…
1.) “Anytime you need me, just call. You know I’m always ready to listen.”
2.) “I wish I was there with you right now, I bet you could use a shoulder rub.”
3.) Of course I want to spend more quality time with you! I’ll just cancel that big night out I had planned with the boys.
4.) Let’s go dancing tonight!"
5.) Do you want to go that movie you were talking about? There’s nothing on t.v. but ball games.
6.) I’m sorry we argued… I knew you were right all along. I just couldn’t admit it.
7.) I found this great cozy hideaway with no t.v.'s. Let’s make plans to go.
8.) Hi, Smoochy poo!! Kiss, Kiss, Kiss, Kiss, Kiss
9.) Why don’t we have lunch together more often? I MISS YOU SOOO MUCH during the day.
10.) Enough about me! I want to know how YOUR day’s going.</p>
<p>My H nagged me all summer about relandscaping the front of the house. (Foundation plantings, shrubs, flowers etc.) Two months ago I called in a landscaper who redesigned, planted and mulched about $5,000 worth of stuff including three trees in the side yard. It was finished six weeks ago. He still hasn’t noticed, but my neighbors are all calling and asking for the landscaper’s number. (I paid the bill from my own bank account.) Go figure.</p>
<p>We did that Yankee swap thing, except it came with a different name. The rules were, it had to be something in your “attic” that you didn’t want. We brought a hanging wine rack-thingy that took up most of a wall and some Russian bric-a-brac that looked like a sort-of 8X10 bling (when we did it, every guest, even if part of a couple, brought a “gift”). It was absolutely hilarious. To pull this off, you have to have a couple of people there who are verbose comedians- it became absolutely raucous when we did it. I would LOVE to do this again, if I had the guests to pull it off. What fun!</p>