<p>I’m not sure you have to “blame” anything or anyone. We’re trying so hard to teach our kids that things aren’t always “fair,” and that as long as they gave it their best shot, even when outcomes aren’t what they hope/desire, things have a way of working out for the best in spite of the initial disappointment. </p>
<p>Plus - you never know what might be around the corner that’s even better than what you had planned! Our DS applied to two schools last year - he was waitlisted at Exeter, and declined at Choate. This year, he applied to four schools - and neither of the schools he applied to last year made the final cut this year. We ended up with a list of schools that would be a <em>much</em> better fit for him - so in hindsight, he’s glad that the decisions turned out the way it did last M10. (He’s fortunate in that he’s already been accepted to one of the four schools, which has rolling admission, so not matter what happens on M10, he knows he will be attending a great school next fall.)</p>