<p>Thank you, notrichenough :).
Unfortunately, I am not as lucky as you. There is unemployment, health problems, drug abuse, and almost every other issue you could imagine in my family. None of which are my fault (nor are they obviously anyone else’s), but things that I am forced to be punished for, in one way or another. So it does bother me when people on this board (not you) try to make people like me feel bad for getting aid or somehow insinuate that we are undeserving. People are mad at the system, and is often people like me that get the brunt of the anger, and that is simply not fair. So I often come off sounding like I am attacking, but it is really just my own anger at the system coming out.</p>
<p>I believe that people like me should have the same opportunities as people like your son/daughter, notrichenough. That means that I believe that if they have to take out 100k in loans, then we should too. But, I also believe that we should get the help that we need to make up for what our parents cannot provide. But again, in no way do I believe that means that we should have a free ride to a school out of our price range.</p>
<p>romani - Please stop reading this thread! You have had enough to deal with and don’t need to be made to feel guilty about taking an opportunity that has been offered to you. It is enough that the school, their actual donors, and your family, believe in you. Not necessary to have random people on the internet giving you the thumbs up as well!<br>
Be well, do your best, and take the opportunity to give someone else your help and support whenever possible.</p>
<p>It is not a fair system. Very few systems are fair. There are some acute necessities of life that are not dispensed in a fair matter that are even more serious problems. I do agree that it is unfair that at the time when kids area supposed to be making that break from their parents, they are still financially tied in the college payment systems.</p>
<p>Folks and Moderators - I have had several messages from some extremely upset seniors who have read this thread and are now worrying that they will encounter extreme prejudice if they go to college on a scholarship. I don’t believe this was anyone’s intention here and suggest that you might move or open a new thread on the Parent’s board if it’s necessary to continue this discussion. </p>
<p>I suggest that anyone who worries about prejudice about being on financial aid or scholarship at certain schools look at the % of kids who are on financial aid, have merit awards and are taking out loans. The % is close to half even for the most “elite” schools.</p>
<p>Oh, I think kids talk about who is getting FA and how much. It is seen as very cool to be getting a lot of FA. Those paying full freight are assumed of being spoiled, rich, unworthy, immoral, the usual.</p>
<p>Your kid should say “I’m fortunate that my parents are well educated and have earned a decent salary and lived below their means and sacrificed every day of their lives to save enough to allow me to graduate debt free”. That oughta shut the kids on FA up. Most kids on FA graduate with loans, mine will have about 30K.</p>
<p>My son attends a school where according to financial aid statistics only 50% of the students are eligible for financial aid. Our family is firmly middle class based on national averages, (but by CC standards I would call ourselves lower middle class) I worried that my son would feel like he didn’t have as much money as everyone else, but according to him no one can tell the rich from the poor. </p>
<p>Based on what my son knows about what his roomate’s parents do for a living and the companies they work for my son knows that his roomate’s family is financially well-off. However, if you walked into their dorm room you would not find a refridgerator or TV, neither of them are into the prestige of owning the latest technology, and their closets are far from full. Both of them enjoy themselves without spending a lot of money. I’m guessing that some would suspect that they are both on full financial aid. FYI about half of the cost of attendance for my son is covered by grants, scholarships, loans and WS, and possibly his roomate is full pay or has some type of academic scholarship. </p>
<p>I’m sure a lot depends on the school you go to, but in my son’s experience no one knows how much everyone else pays.</p>
<p>I went to work at the school cafeteria to get some extra spending money after my first term at school. The next thing I knew, most of the girls in my hall joined me as they thought it was a great idea. Some of them were not on financial aid. Yes, there were some truly rich kids at the school too, that were in a world of their own, but they were the true outliers. For the most part at our school, many of the kids who weren’t on financial aid were from families that were not eligible but still felt those tuition checks. </p>
<p>More of any issue is if a student is Pell grant eligible. There are some schools that have very few such kids. Some can feel out of place indeed. But in my experience, kids who are getting some financial aid and those who are not are not that different in terms of family situations.</p>
<p>My D is on f/a and has no clue who is or is not. This is at an expensive school where many pay full freight. If she ran with a group that made sure they let on that they could afford the school with no f/a, she might feel differently. But because she would have no interest in hanging around such students, it’s not an issue.</p>
<p>A young man I know receives a full Pell & major f/a at an expensive LAC. He is certain no one else there is as poor as he … but some must be, since the stats show there are quite a few like him at this school. So again, it’s hard to know who is on f/a.</p>
<p>I would wonder about my kid’s friends if they actually discussed how cool it is or is not to be on f/a.</p>
<p>My kids are not on financial aid. None of them have been. But we are taking out loans and they have to work. I don’t think they feel any richer than many of the kids who are on aid.</p>
<p>I see nothing wrong in having people from less fortunate families get help…that’s not really the issue. I think the big problem is more that aid programs screw over the middle class. People are bitter because they are judged as being capable of forking over $50,000 a year, when they really aren’t capable of giving such huge sums of money. Hopefully, the situation will change in the next few years. If you think about it, though, it’s only been a few years since the really unfortunate started getting a lot of aid. Now it’s the middle class’ turn. (I think Harvard serves as a good bellwether for widespread institutional change…their recently instituted financial aid program will slowly force others to change as well. Obviously not everyone has a huge endowment, but still, you’ll see middle-class families getting more and more FA soon enough.)</p>