I’m a rising hs senior and Harvard and Tufts are my two top choices but I just can’t decide between the two. I am a double legacy at Harvard so both of my parents are really pressuring me into having it be my first choice, but I’m not sure if that’s what I really want. Both of my parents are extremely unhappy and I just kind of want to go on my own path. However, I feel like if I choose Tufts as my first choice I will be wasting the opportunity of going to Harvard because I have an increased chance of getting in because of my legacy and my parents would also probably be disappointed. Any advice?
Why are your parents extremely unhappy ? Does their extreme unhappiness have anything to do with Harvard ?
Why are Tufts & Harvard your top two choices ?
Why don’t you apply to both, see where you get in, and then decide?
First thing first. You’d need not only to apply to your “top two choices,” Harvard and Tufts, but several more schools consisting of reach, match and safeties. Then, worry about which school you’d like to attend after the results. I don’t understand why your parents are “extremely unhappy” when you’ve merely placed the cart before the horse.
Four points: 1) you are attending, not your parents, decide your first choice for yourself; 2) as noted above, make sure you have a good well-balanced list; 3) don’t overestimate the legacy bump; 4) if you do feel like you have the application that might warrant a Harvard admission and you are gaming out your SCEA/ED strategy, keep in mind that Tufts has an ED II. If you (deciding for yourself) want to SCEA to Harvard, the dates may work out such that you can SCEA to Harvard and then ED II to Tufts if you don’t make it. Just make sure you have a good regular decision list and recognize that you will have used your early shots on schools to which you are unlikely to be admitted just looking at the rates of admission.
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If you’re parents are disappointed, that’s on them, not you! Make sure that you make the choice for yourself which one you like better (if you even get in to either and/or both of them).
Are your parents unhappy that you may not want to go to Harvard, are the unhappy as a result lof going to Harvard in your mind, are they unhappy people? Sorry it wasn’t clear.
Tufts is a great school with some of the positives of a liberal arts school but also a university. The location and campus are nice, and the subway is 10 minutes away.
I would suggest applying to both (you don’t have to do early decision, if that is the issue) and some other schools as well. If you like Tufts, look at the other "little Ivies: like Amherst, Williams, Wesleyan, and others, and also look at some other liberal arts colleges.
If your parents are unwilling to pay if you don’t choose Harvard, if you get in, that is another issue. Then you might need a counselor or other advisor to mediate.
You also can go to Tufts or some other school for undergrad, and then go to Harvard for grad or professional school.
It is possible that you may be more comfortable at Tufts than at Harvard since you will surrounded by superstars and over-achievers at Harvard. Some students put a lot of pressure on themselves or suffer from "imposter syndrome" if they are surrounded by extremely high-achieving classmates. Others thrive on it. If you do not mind being potentially a small fish in a big pond (where you also can learn from your peers) or are extremely self-directed and know what you want in your university education, Harvard will be the top choice. On the other hand, if that is not who you are, then going to Tufts or perhaps a smaller ivy e.g. Brown, Dartmouth or a LAC may be a better option. I definitely agree with other posters that you should look at other schools. There certainly is a wide spectrum, and perhaps a better fit for you than either of them.
At Tufts or some other school, you may find that if you are one of the better students, you will not need to work as hard to stay at the top and be able to enjoy other activities in college. If you do not know what you want to do after college, you may feel less pressure to achieve professional goals to land the right job or get into the right graduate school afterwards. Undergrad life also could allow you to explore different fields since you will not feel that you need to compete with classmates who will be focusing on being the best at their chosen fields. It will be harder to get lost at a smaller school. And perhaps more fun, depending upon the student. My brother went to Harvard for undergrad. Unfortunately several of his classmates fell through the cracks-emotionally and/or academically, particularly during the freshman year. One of his friends left after a severe episode of depression never to return. His freshman roommate muddled his way academically and probably would have done much better at a smaller and less competitive environment while maintaining his sense of self-confidence. To this day he has not really achieved much success in his career unfortunately. Harvard is a great school but not for everybody.The OP asked the question over a year ago. Presumably, they are about to start college somewhere any minute. If they return and want to update, they can PM me to reopen.