@schroscat I like it – alot. Here is the conlcusion of my common app essay:
“I struggle every day with my future. The challenge is going to be to find a career that serves my mission in the world: a doctor in the global south, a civic leader, a priest? I don’t know. Whatever path I take, I hope to stretch my sense of self and continue to live my faith by engaging with others. Everyone’s eyes have a story to tell. I want to see behind the eyes of my yet-to-be-realized friends in God. In understanding their stories, I hope to complete the arc of mine.”
@pioneer16 I have no idea either. I’m the first to go to college in my family, so I promised my family that I will wait 'till I get home to open it with them.
Also I just wanted to say that I am so glad I applied to Harvard. Not because it is Harvard but because it gave me the opportunity to meet all of you. Everyone here is fascinating intelligent and diverse, and I seriously cherish the cyber friendships I’ve made. If you missed my post a while back, I do not have very many friends in my school. I’ve had a really tough time, but all of you have given me a light at the end of the tunnel. I know that wherever I go to college, I will get to meet amazing people, like all of you. Good luck tomorrow. We have worked so hard up until now, and whatever the outcome, you deserve to be praised.
Ending of my personal statement:
It was then that I realized that I am neither the person I am at school nor the person I am at home; rather, I am a blend of the two identities. My actions lie in the fact that my school identity has taught me how to be successful, while my home identity has taught me the meaning of success.
Now when somebody asks me, “Who are you?” I know how to answer. I am neither “white washed” nor “ghetto.” Yo soy Latino y de Pico Rivera, and I attend Loyola High School. I take pride in both identities because both sides have shaped the character that I am today. With my new understanding of who I am, I will work to change my own little part of the world.
@aharper98 That’s such a wonderful conclusion! I actually really, really like that. That’s wow…
Here’s mine:
“And that’s where I am now. As the first in my family born in the States, I’ll be the first to go to a university here, as well as the first to study medicine. Above all, I’ll prove to myself and my mother that I am able to turn an unexpected event that changed my entire life into something positive. My father’s death directed me to my path in life; my passion is my father alive in me, and I could not be more grateful.”
it’s pretty cheesy.
the end of my supplement is rubbish, but I’m actually kind of proud of the beginning?
"I have written so many essays in the past few months: drafts and drafts of the Common App essay, the college-specific supplements, the “who are you?,” the “why our school?,” the “tell us something we don’t know.” I have written about fencing and theatre and singing and superheroes, lists of books I’ve read and the move that nearly tore my family apart. I can recite the formula in my sleep: be personal, but not overly revealing; be humble, but not self-deprecating; be confident, but not cocky; be original, take risks, but not too much; tell anecdotes as synecdoche for life as a whole; stand out, stand out, stand out.
@Drewwwfoo I can’t think of a greater family moment than a first gen opening an acceptance letter to Harvard – that’s absolutely awesome man. I really hope you get in! If you don’t, I’m sure you’ll go to another outstanding school so don’t sweat it!!
@schroscat thank you! Yours was beautiful as well.
EVERYONE: Just a question. Is it weird that my cat submitted my Harvard app? I was sitting there and incredibly nervous to press submit so I picked up my overweight cat named “Zeus” and helped him press the mouse to submit my app. Lol. I got it on video too.
Does anyone have any superstitions leading up to the decisions. I have a Harvard t-shirt I’ve been wearing to bed for the past couple of days…but that’s about it.
that’s very kind