I was reading a thread that asked people if seeing a certain play was life changing for them and what exactly life changing meant.
Have you had a life changing experience or event? If so, how did it change you?
I know that having or adopting a child, or becoming a parent through marriage is life changing. Many of us have experienced this, including me.
I also know that people have had life changing experiences from religious conversions, awakenings, etc. so have I. But CC does not want us talking about religion.
So besides parenthood and religion, have you had a life changing event or experience and are you willing to share how it changed your life?
Recovering from a life-threatening illness is a life-changing experience for many people. It gives you a new beginning and a new perspective. But that change does not last long. For me it was only ~2-3 years.
I’d consider the day I was told I had a brain tumor to be life changing. It ended up being a “good” kind, so not terrible, but the way I think about life is still considerably different. There really is so much more small stuff to not sweat now.
Then, of course, there are still ongoing health issues helping me be far more compassionate to others.
In all, it’s helped us step out of the rat race and enjoy more of life (while still paying bills, etc) even if life is likely to be shorter. Sunsets, flowers, the fun of a game playing evening, the times we get to travel - all are so enjoyable. Heck, even the box of Count Chocula I bought for “me” as a treat this Halloween tastes really good.
The illness and death of my husband.
I am living alone for the first time in my life.
It is so weird to come home and nothing has been changed or moved, which certainly highlights a sense of isolation.
Encountering in the workplace a boss who was genuinely, severely mentally disturbed. It made me reevaluate what’s important in life, and I decided the Corporate Life wasn’t for me anymore.
diagnosis of several cancers (all, thank God) in remission. Other medical issues…none to be named here. Good life changes…when our son got married to his wife. Wonderful. Oh…and when our most challenging child grew up and became a wonderful person, sans the smirk and the screaming.
Waking up in a hospital and being told that I had a heart attack while driving my SUV, and was minutes away from death changed me. I appreciate the little things, take time to talk with people, and never sweat the small stuff. I’m still here for a reason so I’ve left my comfort zone behind. Every day is being played with the house’s money.
Having myself and my kids diagnosed with serious chronic health conditions over a decade ago has been life changing. It caused me to be a much more informed health advocate and consumer, for myself and them. It also caused me to switch careers and form a nonprofit corporation for health advocacy regarding my condition and get more involved in health advocacy locally and nationally (am an officer in national board RE health advocacy and consumer reviewer of Dept of Defense medical grants). More importantly, it has caused us to stop and smell the roses and really appreciate all the many good things in life.
(These posts remind me that we really need a “hug” button. “Like” is not the right thing. Consider yourselves hugged, y’all)
My son almost died of a rare, permanent illness. Slept on the floor in the hospital, holding his hand so we knew he was breathing. Doctors called up and down the east coast to find a diagnosis. Had a come to Jesus meeting with the counselor as she prepared us. (They figured it out. He’s good now)
My other son became (unrelated) seriously depressed and developed an anxiety disorder that disrupted his college life but he kept it from us because he didn’t know how to tell us, but we Found Out In Time. But I still remember hanging on to his coat as he frantically tried to run out of the house and into traffic. He’s dragging me across our foyer floor to reach the door and I am literally hanging on for his life, both of us crying. (I tackled him. He gave up. He’s good now)
The summer my father in law died at the beginning of summer, my grandmother died in the middle of summer, and my D started getting her spontaneous lung collapses at the end of summer.
Over the course of the next year and half D had two lung surgeries and was dx’d as a carrier for a lung/liver disorder, H lost his job, we moved to another state for a new job, and H’s brother committed suicide.
@HImom thanks, things are better now. It took several years of no major stressors. D is 8 years past her last lung surgery and in med school. Life is just more stable in general.
Like everyone else -serious illness. I was so worried/sad about My oldest daughter going away to college. Then the week before she left my youngest was diagnosed with a rare tumor.
My emotional state changed quickly. Both are doing well now. At the time I thought if I just could know that my D was going to be OK that everything would be OK forever. LOL. I wish I could say that I don’t sweat the small stuff now. But I do. However my relationship with my daughters has changed. We are all close and I am so grateful for my two healthy children.
It seems as though most of you have named things that are usually considered very bad as life changing events. H and I have had our share of not so great events in recent years as well. And it has changed us. H is actually considering retiring in a few years!! We are trying to travel, something we want to do, more and appreciate and enjoy more time with family and friends.
Interesting that folks say being diagnosed with…, not being healed is the life changing event. Experiencing the tragedy not the recovery, etc. This is not a judgement, just an observation. I guess the bad thing was life changing and the good thing was the moving on, or surviving and changing.
I started this thread because I guess I am facing something that seems to be life changing. So how do we define life changing? I would define it as a different way to approach, think of or live life.
So facing death or severe disability makes you face life and come to understand how you want to live. I have had something recently, not a major life threatening event at all. But it did make me, for some reason, face my age. And I have been feeling like the “shoe is about to fall” ever since. So this seems to be life changing in a negative sense. Affects my sleep,interaction with other people, etc.
I’ve had a couple of “life changing experiences.” Getting divorced with a 2 yo and a 4 yo made me consider what was really important. Spending time with kids, family and friends - yes, clean house - not so much.
Recently my mom was diagnosed with dementia, at 69, and her sister died at 71, after suffering multiple ailments, including dementia. They both smoked, and didn’t take care of themselves as well as they should have, but it does make me think about retiring earlier, and remembering to enjoy today in addition to planning for tomorrow.
I mean… it makes sense for bad things to be the life-changing events. After all, how many people change their lives if they’re happy, healthy, and generally doing well?
For me, all of my life-changing events (yes, all related to death and/or disability) have come with both positives and negatives. But really, for me, they just amplified what was already there. I was never one for drama or petty crap but the illness just gave me even more of a reason to say “screw it” and not even bother justifying why I was cutting something negative out of my life.
