<p>OK, you experienced parents. We need some advice. Freshman daughter went out of state Fall semester, but decided to transfer to go locally and live at home – partly because she wanted to, partly because we could not afford the out of state expenses. We are really hurting financially (hubby lost his job and had to take a job that pays a lot less, and I have had to go from part time to full time.) She also got a job this summer.</p>
<p>Question: What is fair and reasonable for her do with her paycheck? Thanks for your ideas/feedback!</p>
<p>What is fair and reasonable is going to be different for different parents here in terms of values and personal situations. </p>
<p>In my view, your question would be far different if your D came home to live and NOT attend college. But she is living at home in part to save some of the college expenses…namely room and board will be saved by not living at an out of state school. Mission accomplished. IF you as parents were paying for college BEFORE, then I would assume that this arrangement would continue now but that you are saving on room and board with this new arrangement. Her earnings would go to spending money…or if you have it set up that she buys books or whatever she paid for before (student loans?). In other words, I wouldn’t see any change in what she pays for and what you pay for with this new arrangement of going to school locally. I don’t know, however, how you have it set up. In our family, the parents pay but obviously this differs with all families. Our kids do earn extra spending money of their own. I think however YOU have it set up as to who pays for what in college should be the same whether she goes to school locally or away. The saving money was meant to be part of living at home for college. Hopefully her earnings can help with her personal expenses. </p>
<p>However, if your D had come home to live and work and was NOT attending college, then I would think she’d contribute to some of her living expenses.</p>
<p>I agree with soozievt and I am going to expand on that advice to include families where tuition ( most!) cost is a concern. ( bears repeating- for the newbies)
Select schools that meet 100% of need( they are not going to be public, especially out of state public-)
Don’t apply ED
If you have to go out of state & are looking at public schools, seriously consider schools that belong to your states reciprocal tuition program.
<a href=“http://www.mhec.org/index.asp?pageid=1[/url]”>http://www.mhec.org/index.asp?pageid=1</a>
( I see schools in Illinois still have to join)
You also could seriously consider attending community college, even in another region of your state for two years and transferring.</p>
<p>Since there seem to be conflicts re- household chores- driving & behavior issues, I think that I would suggest that she either take a year off- to work/volunteer with americorp- and live elsewhere ( where there is better public transportation and she won’t have the expense of a car)
Or if she is doing well in school and wants to stay in the school she is currently attending, to possibly live on or close to campus- as that can be much cheaper than a dorm.</p>
<p>If the only thing that is agreed on, is for her to continue to live at home-
I think her summer income should go 100% towards her school and personal expenses & her school year time, focused on her academics so she can aim for scholarships/aid, to allow her to attend a residential campus.</p>
<p>Im wondering if her reversion to adolescent behavior is acting out over frustration at having to move back home and returning to the role of a child, rather than a college student.</p>
<p>I see from your past posts it looks like she got into some very good schools, with very good aid, that seems far preferable to me, than moving back home and having to drive 30 miles for work while attending school.
But maybe thats just me.</p>
<p>If your child obtains fin aid, they can only earn “X” amount of bucks, before it is factored into the fin aid and all. </p>
<p>Asides from that, I think your child should put away money for books for fall and spring for sure. And, if they are going to work part time during the University year, then they should pay the internet bill or something.</p>