I have the impression from various things I’ve read over the years that women are more prone to suffer from anxiety and that it often starts in late teens/early twenties. Is this true and, if so, what manifests the onset?
Have any anxiety sufferers on this thread tried products with CBD?
@anomander I’m assuming you’re talking about marijuana-related CBD.
I use a low THC/high CBD type of marijuana for pain control. I’m not really sure what, if any, effect it has on my anxiety. It does however help me sleep which is a major problem with my anxiety.
I just want to counter a comment upthread that medication is the ONLY way to control symptoms. I have one family member with anxiety and OCD who has been able to learn to keep it under control with CBT, without medication. So while meds are often, even maybe usually necessary, they are not always.
@romanigypsyeyes Yes, that’s what I was wondering about. There’s high-CBD sub-lingual sprays and chews now to make it more discreet and easier to use, so I was curious about efficacy in general.
@anomander I tried the sublingual drops (not spray but drops) once and only once. For me, it was horrible. I have a terrible gag reflex though. For that reason, I wouldn’t use chew either.
I either take it in pill form or edibles. Even the edibles are gross to me but I can at least keep those down. The pill form is by far the easiest for me but it tends to be much more expensive.
@romanigypsyeyes - thank you for your description of an anxiety attack. My D was diagnosed about 2 years ago with ADD and having anxiety attacks (during senior year of HS). When I read your description, she tells me that is exactly how she feels. Her doctor had her on medication, but after some CBT, she/they decided she would cut back off the meds for both ADD and anxiety. That has been about 6-8 months ago. She has had one minor flare but is using these techniques to help:
Tip to help with an anxiety attack:
- Look around you.
- Find 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell and 1 thing you can taste. This is called grounding. It can help when you feel like you have lost all control of your surroundings.
Alternate:
Find 5 things of different colors, name their five colors. Like: Brown chair, white table, green couch, red walls, blue box. Brown, white, green, red, blue. Repeat them in your head or say it out loud if you prefer.
There's also the option to sit on the edge of a chair (or any stable surface), then you put your hands on your knees while keeping your back straight. This will forces you to keep keep your balance, and feel more grounded to the world around you. At the same time, find the five colors and repeat it in your head.
Her biggest problem is over thinking and making a mountain out of a molehill. But so far, she’s doing pretty good. SHe even started a new job without having an attack.
My biggest problem is trying to be patient with her when she is asking me if her outfit is good, or am I sure it’s okay for…
This has been a learning experience for both of us.
Getting lots of good info here
Yes, I agree, lots of very helpful info. Thank you all for sharing such personal stories. I think that a fair amount of us have a loved one dealing with some degree of anxiety and it helps to read and learn from others.
I don’t suffer it to any great level most of the time, but when it hits it is a real buster…for me, as others have said, it is about the mind whirring with all kinds of issues that can happen, like not being able to sleep with my mind whirring because the roof needs doing, my kid is in college, the kitchen floor needs doing, (all the things most people face), but having them ramped up to where they make no logical sense. When big time anxiety attacks hit it can feel like having a heart attack or something. I suspect most people have these some time in their lives, when major issues are happening, when life kind of gets out of control, but with me it often happens with things that I look back and scratch my head why it bothered me.
My wife had a period when she was having anxiety attacks, it was a particularly stressful time for us, and because she also had low lying depression, they were trying meds on her. She found that when they tried her on a dopamine based med (welbutrin), it drove the level and number of attacks through the roof.
As far as (fairly mild) social anxiety goes, I got a friend request the other day from someone I know through volunteering. My immediate thought was that she had requested me by accident. I still haven’t accepted it because what if?? What if it was an accident and she doesn’t actually like me? What if she likes me all right now but decides that I’m a loser after seeing more personal things about me?
Odds are that she meant to request me, although I’ve definitely done it by accident before. But my brain is convinced that something will go horribly wrong if I accept.
Several family members are dealing with anxiety. Catastrophic thinking - my professor is not anwering my email because he hates me. Also had physical reactions - shortness of breath when thinking about walking into his department.
Medication is tricky and very individual for what works and what doesn’t. As well as dealing with side effects and interactions with other medications.
One thing recommended by therapists for anxiety was cardio exercise. Exercise that raised the heart rate was seen as helpful. On the flip side also suggested meditation and slow breathing.
Back to the OP, I am glad that my description was helpful. Unfortunately, I still have not really figured out a way to control my anxiety despite experiencing it for over a decade. For me, Zoloft helps quite a bit (I’ve tried several different anti-anxiety and anti-depression meds) but the CBT never really worked. I tried 3 different therapists over the years and it just did not work for me.
The only advice I can give is like I said earlier: concrete plans. Open-ended anything makes me anxious and I clam up. Everyone experiences and copes with anxiety differently.
I will say the one thing that does NOT help is when people tell me that they understand or that it’ll be OK. Unless you have anxiety and can actually relate, it just feels infantilizing.
So, for those of you who suffer from anxiety or have loved ones who do, when did this crop up? I’m still trying to understand why this seems to occur in late teens/early 20s and why more females than males? Anyone have answers/theories?
Friendly moderator’s suggestion
Let’s please try to keep the responses to what the OP asked about - helping her understand what anxiety is like. A thread like this is easy to veer off into discussing only what causes it and treatments, which does not help the OP understand what it is like.
While I occasionally suffer from anxiety (probably secondary to depression rather than as a primary diagnosis), my husband’s side of the family has many family members that have anxiety big-time. I used to think that the excessive rumination and need to prepare for every eventuality was some sort of OCD and that DH’s not liking to socialize was because he is an introvert, but I have since come to realize that it was anxiety. His mother had it big time (it was in recognizing her anxiety that I came to see it in my husband, in my daughter, in nieces and nephews on my husband’s side), etc.
In answer to your question, @doschicos, now that I recognize how anxiety manifests itself, I can look back to my daughter even as a toddler and see her having to cope with anxiety. By 2nd and 3rd grade we were able to get it diagnosed when she started having severe heart palpitations in anxiety-provoking situations at school, in social situations, etc.
Thanks for all the posts and I’m also glad to hear there’s not a proven link between anxiety (or depression) and the BCP.
In terms of when it came on for my relative, it seems that it was during college. Very bright young woman who went to a reach school with little support. Multiple things happened, a number beyond her control, that resulted in her being less successful than she would have expected for herself. I assumed her anxiety began as a result of this series of events during her college years but now I wonder if it would have emerged regardless of her college experience.
I’m spending time with her later today and have learned quite a bit from this thread. Will definitely be keeping much of what’s been written here in mind. And, @romanigypsyeyes, I don’t know if I’ve said “I understand” or “it’ll be okay” (latter less likely) but I certainly won’t now and I will try to be very concrete.
My anxiety started when I was a child. It has ebbed and flowed over the years and changed somewhat in how it manifests. Mornings are the worst: I wake up, often remember my dreams vividly, sometimes feel as though there is a weight on my chest, bemoan the ordeal of getting through another day. Work is a good distraction, but this leads me to work too much sometimes and feel as though I always have to be doing something. Being with other people is a good distraction but I tend to be very self-conscious and so after I’ve been chatting with people, I tend to relentlessly dissect what I said for signs of “how stupid I sounded.” Knowing that I’m going to do this often persuades me to not participate in social situations at all. Major worries ignite my brain to gut connection: often, there are only a few moments between the worrisome thing occurring and my stomach clenching.
This thread is so helpful. My 18-year-old daughter was diagnosed with anxiety about a year and a half ago, and I’ve had a hard time understanding what she’s going through. My nickname for D as she was growing up was “Sunshine,” so this has been hard for me to process. Thanks to everyone who has shared their stories.
Good luck, @collage1 She is very lucky to have someone like you in your life.
If she is open to it (and I don’t know what type of relationship you two have), and this anxiety is a new thing (not just newly diagnosed), you might want to broach the subject of medications. My anxiety went through the roof (hello vivid dreams from hell!) when I started on prednisone but it eventually leveled off.