Help! What do I do?!?

College Life
1

Hey guys.
So I hate admitting this. I really do. But at this point, I don’t really care. I’d rather just say what’s on my mind than not ask for help.

So I’m a graduate student at USC, and so far it’s been amazing! It’s difficult academically, but there are so many aspects about USC that make it all worth it.

The only problem is, I feel homesick a lot. Before graduate school, I went to undergrad in state, where I got to see my family, my brothers and sisters, and my pets anytime I felt like it. Now that’s not the case anymore. Just this past week, I had the WORST flu I’ve ever had. My dad is a doctor, and usually he can be there in a second and help me out. Only this time, he was 10 hours away and there was nothing he could do. I ended up having to go to the ER by myself, and it was SO scary for me for some reason.

I’m a young graduate student, and to be honest I was used to my parents doing everything for me. It’s been hard for me to adjust to little things, such as doing my own laundry, or going to the doctor to say that I’m sick, or cleaning, etc. I know these are all things that I have to do. But I’m entering my second year of grad school now… and I’m wondering when it’s going to get better. I’m going to graduate this year, and it’s not like I’m going to be able to go home to my small town. But compared to everyone else, since I didn’t “go away” to college or really challenge myself by living away from home during my undergrad years, I still feel like a sophomore in college. And right now, I just feel so far behind everyone else, and like a big baby. Academically, I can handle it. I dedicate almost all of my time to school. It’s hard sometimes, but that’s not what I’m worried about. What I’m worried about is that I’m about to graduate and get my masters degree at USC, and perhaps go onto another amazing school and get my doctorate-yet I still miss my PARENTS.

At my undergrad university, I did well academically. I was in sports, and a sorority, and was extremely social. But now whenever someone doesn’t like my idea or something in a group presentation, or when I go on a bad date, or when I get sick… I lose a lot of confidence. And just want to go home.

Has anyone else ever felt like this?
If so, what did you do?

Thanks for any help.

2

You have done a great job describing what you feel and why you might feel that way. You have been given the wonderful gift of growing up in a close family that you love and parents who you respect. You also went to undergraduate school in a way that you could continue to enjoy that closeness. So now you are in graduate school, and the newness of that experience has kind of worn off and you realize second year in how much you miss your family. There is absolutely nothing wrong or abnormal about this feeling. Feelings of homesickness can come and go anytime in life. (Even for 50+ year olds like me who haven’t lived near parents in 20 years!). However, if your feelings are interfering with your daily functioning, then some brief counseling at the student counseling center may be helpful.

3

By living away from home, you are learning how to take care of yourself. This is a good thing.

However, some people do like living near their family. Perhaps you will look for a job near your hometown.

But keep in mind that although you are learning academically, you also learning “life skills”. These are important too.

4

It’s a hard transition, yes, but it’s part of life. Everyone has to leave the nest sometime. You just have to push though and take it one day at a time.