<p>I need adivce my parents are ****<strong><em>s …they keep putting me down and they keep threatening to kick me out but when i call them on it by saying “then why the hell dont you” they just tell me to keep quiet . They call me useless and i painted their damn house and didnt charge them a dime and the entire time they called me useless and on multiple times they asked me “why are you so angry” they make me angry …im 19 im studying criminal justice and they tell me to drop my dream of becoming a cop and to become some dude on wall street to get rich and give them money its my life not theirs and they always threathen to put their hands on me i never said it to them but im more then willing to defend my self if needed i know people will say "you shouldnt put your hands on your parents " its less then they deserve i also know people will say “move out” im working part time and to be honest i dont care if thy kick me out sure i cant afford it but its better then living with them but then i dont stop getting the damn call saying “come back home” and i yell “for what so you can abuse me more?!?” And they say no we never abused you …because of them i dot know if i can even become a police officer …they *</em></strong>ed me up so bad that i cant think right at times i nee help</p>
<p>Your family needs professional counseling. I know they won’t get it, but everyone needs it. We can’t really provide the help here, but we can make some suggestions. I’m not a professional counselor, so you really need to seek some expert advice. My suggestions are based on mistakes I’ve seen my friends make with their adult children:</p>
<p>First of all, you need to realize that there are no mandatory parenting classes required to become a parent. We all learn our behaviors from our parents. Your parents are following an ingrained pattern of **verbal and emotional abuse ** that was modeled by their parents. If you are being abused, they were probably abused in the same manner.</p>
<p>The other thing you need to know is that some parents don’t know how to handle their children’s growing up and going away. They’re angry and they appear to be out of options. You need to realize that you have to be the stronger person here-even though they are supposed to be more mature. </p>
<p>Yes they are being extremely hurtful, unkind and abusive and you can ask them about that in the most direct way I know: “Why do you hate me?” That will blow them away, and they won’t know how to answer. </p>
<p>In the meantime, study what you want and try to ignore their tirades; knowing full well that there are issues, you need to be as patient as you can be.</p>
<p>If you are in college, go to the counseling center at your school. Someone there should be able to help you. You need to talk to someone about this. A clergyman might be a good resource as well.</p>
<p>aunt bea is right. The whole family needs professional counseling, but she’s also right that they won’t get it. </p>
<p>The only person you can control is YOU. So YOU get counseling. It will help you begin to make sense of your emotions and your life, and it will help you start down the road of making better choices for yourself and your future than they did.</p>