The daughter of a friend was injured last week at her OOS university. She is not hospitalized but needs to get to some appointments and do wound care, and the wound is affecting her ability to do tasks like personal care and laundry and is slowing her down generally. My friend and her husband are currently with their daughter at the university but wondering how to proceed. They are independent contractors and so don’t have paid leave of any kind. Their finances are tight. The university-provided health insurance is probably more comprehensive than their coverage in our home state. The daughter’s friends have been very helpful but don’t have unlimited time to accompany her to appointments and such.
If you were the parent in this situation, what would you do?
I’m not the decision-maker, but would like to offer my friend ideas about things she and her family might do in this unfortunate situation.
I have a friend recovering from knee surgery and the insurance covers a certain amount of in home health care, a nurse comes around to keep an eye on the wound and change bandages. Also and aid coming to help with bathing, hair washing.
Most Unis have some kind of outside services around you can pay for laundry. The parents might pay a student helper for her.
Have them check to see if the disabilities office will help with short term disabilities. They may be able to provide services at least on campus, it not out in the community.
I think any solution will cost some money (unfortunately - medical issues usually do).
I would first try all of the university’s resources: health center, advisors, disabilities office, etc. - call each and ask how they can help your child (this is one case where I think it is appropriate for the parent to call the school and find out what services they can offer.) Maybe the campus security can provide transportation to appointments, maybe the disabilities office can provide unpaid assistance (like they provide note-takers for classes for students with disabilities), etc. You don’t know what is available until you ask.
Make sure all of the student’s professors know about the situation (either the adviser or student should communicate with them.) The teachers might offer some assistance (the TA can help the student take notes, walk to classes, etc.)
Next I would try and find students to pay to help - try advertising on the facebook etc. College students are desperate for money and would not want much money to do simple helpful tasks like laundry, etc.
I would try and be with the student as much as possible based upon work commitments. Mom and dad should split visit time so only one is with her at a time.
organize the friends help - put up a list on facebook with tasks and organize volunteers for each of them (like communities do when a family is in need and they organize rotating dinners.) I am sure each friend might be able to handle one task and none will be overwhelmed.
Thanks for all the suggestions! I paid for my friend’s plane ticket and have offered to pay for classmates to help the daughter. My friend’s job is one for which she can’t get substitutes and that has regular required appointments, so it seems important that she not have to be gone many days. The daughter’s friends have been very helpful; the mom is just concerned that the family not take advantage of them by expecting too much of their time.
That is also why they should contact the disabilites office. There will be students on work study that can take care of some items. The office is there to help. They should take whatever help is offered and fill in around that. DD’s friend had transportation to and from class, someone to hlep with books, etc. It relieved a lot of stress until she was on her feet again.
@rosered55 - You are a wonderful and thoughtful friend. One small note of caution though in the event that your friend’s daughter is a varsity athlete. As silly as it may seem, the NCAA heavily polices gifts or other financial contributions to athletes. I won’t bore you with the rules since you didn’t mention that the student was an athlete, but if she is then you can impair her eligibility or get the school sanctioned.
I know it sounds crazy, but it’s happened before in cases like this rather than those at the million dollar booster level in big-time athletics. Check the rules if she’s an athlete.
As far as getting to appointments. My son went to a fairly small school in PA. He had an ear injury and no transportation to get to doctors either. Freshmen couldn’t have cars so none of his friends could drive him either. He went to the student health center and they arranged for transportation for him to the specialist, I think Security may have driven him. He went by himself at first, but when he needed a procedure (minor surgery for “cauliflower” ear) a friend accompanied him I think. We had an HMO at the time and I had to call our local office to arrange a referral. That was the final nail in my decision to never take the HMO again!