Hi can you guys grade my sat essay on a scale of 1 to 12 and give me feedback on it

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
1

<p>Prompt: Do small decisions often have major consequences?</p>

<p>Small decisions are often overlooked because people associate them with being minor and trivial. However the small decisions are the ones that build up cumulatively and have the greatest outcome in shaping people and events. The important effects of small decisions can be seen in literature and in my life.</p>

<p>During my sophomore year of high school, one of my friends asked me if I wanted to attend a ecology meeting. This decision seemed mundane and inconsequential to me: I could have declined the offer and totally forget my friend’s proposal a few days later. Rather than declining, I chose to attend that meeting. From that point on, I grew a fervid interest in the environment and participated in many community events that helped the environment - planting trees, clearing weeds, trail restoration. I even became the president of ecology club in my junior year. The ostensibly insignificant choice of attending a meeting greatly impacted my life my life as I grew an interest in the environment and became active in environmental events. That same small decision opened new paths for other decisions to be made about ecology club, eventually transforming me into an environmental frenetic. Without this small decision being made, I would have just been an ordinary high school student.</p>

<p>In the novel Believer, James Watson is a young black teen who lives in a ghetto neighborhood. Instead of choosing to hang out on the streets and sell drugs, James chose to read and do his schoolwork. Eventually from constantly making small choices that would help his future, James became an inveterate reader and learner. His habits paid off as he got a college degree and went back to his community to help other struggling students. Every small decision James made to better his education shaped his future as a teacher and mentor to the struggling youth in his community. James could have chosen to avoid the burdens of reading and learning, becoming just another drug dealer. </p>

<p>Just because small decisions involve little consequence in the short term, they build up and have major impacts in the future. James’s minor decision to read often made him into an educator in the future. My decision of attending a meeting helped me to grow a strong interest in the environment which would have never happened if I chose to forgot that meeting.</p>

<p>Can you guys give me feedback on my use of language, focus, conventions, organization, coherence of ideas, variety in sentence structure, and effectiveness of my examples and evidence?</p>

<p>Thanks guys</p>

2

<p>This is generally a great essay. It is well-focused, with strong examples, and you don’t make statements that are not backed up by the examples you have chosen.</p>

<p>The weaknesses you should work on are:

  1. Verb usage
  2. Word choice</p>

<p>In the category of verb usage, when you write “I could have declined the offer and totally forget my friend’s proposal a few days later,” you should note that, grammatically speaking, the “have” in “have declined” carries over to the verb form of “forget” also. So this should say “I could have declined the offer and totally forgotten my friend’s proposal a few days later.” In the final sentence, you again have a problem with the form of “forget.” The final sentence should read " . . . if I chose to forget that meeting," not “if I chose to forgot that meeting.” It would also be somewhat better to say " . . . as I developed an interest in the environment," rather than " . . .as I grew an interest in the environment." (Some of these might just be typos in the essay you entered here.)</p>

<p>In terms of word choice, you have used mundane, inconsequential, and ostensibly precisely right! So that’s good. On the other hand, I think you want “fervent” instead of “fervid,” and “fanatic,” instead of “frenetic.” Also, I think it would be better to open the final paragraph with “Even though,” rather than “just because.”</p>

3

<p>Also, grading officials don’t always tend to be keen on words such as “totally.”</p>

4

<p>Thanks for the tips
But how would I work on verb usage?</p>

5

<p>To work on verb usage, I suggest borrowing a book on English grammar from the library near you. You want to check out the following topics:</p>

<p>Sequence of tenses. This will tell you about using have vs. had as part of the verb, to indicate perfect or past perfect tense, and what tenses they can pair with.</p>

<p>Infinitives: This form has “to” followed by a verb. The verb will be either in the present tense, e.g., “to forget” or in the perfect, “to have forgotten.” There are no forms such as “to forgot” or “to had forgotten.”</p>

<p>Participles.</p>

<p>Gerunds.</p>

<p>When you have mastered these, you can take a look at the subjunctive, but I suggest saving that for last.</p>