This year we were wondering what would happen, because DD has a serious live in boyfriend and this is our first year dealing with the new family relationships. BF has some anxiety dealing with his divorced parents, and “hates Christmas” because at least one of the parents is always unhappy. So this was our long awaited “What are we gonna do when the kids grow up and leave us?” year.
BF’s mom took the initiative for us all to figure out our new situation. We wound up hosting Christmas at our house, so it was seven of us (BF, BF’s mom and BF’s brother) and the four Canarys. BFs dad was invited, but declined, and it seemed like everything was cool, because he had plans.
Christmas dinner was just so sweet! BFs mom loves to cook and brought over a boatload of side dishes and treats. There was a flurry of activity while we all exchanged small presents.
We all were on our best behavior, and it was a warm, lovely holiday. My son enjoyed the extra guests and the flurry of activity. There were no uncomfortable silences and no political arguments. BF’s mom and I hit it off, and said that plans for next year, if the fates allow, will be whatever is easiest for everyone.
BF’s dad started some drama because he was hurt that BF didn’t spend enough time with him, even though
they both took him out for lunch on Christmas Eve, and he said it was fine to spend Christmas at our house, and they see him all the time. I guess it all got smoothed over, but by then I was fast asleep.
Let’s see: S (in grad school in our town) picked up my 95-year-old mother at her living facility about half an hour away and brought her to our house while his GF Skyped with her parents on the other side of the country. then went home to get her, and they came up with the delicious pumpkin cheesecake she had made. My adult niece came down with the flu and stayed home to avoid endangering her grandma, so we didn’t have her and her boyfriend for a change. Then we had our two “extras” – another person in S’s program and his wife, who come from the other side of the country and, like last year, couldn’t get home for Christmas because of $$ and her job, so they’re now part of our family for Christmas. Yeah, everyone had a great time.
@AboutTheSame, I used my fingers to count how many people showed up for your feast. Finger went up for your niece, then went down, because she had the flu.Two fingers up for your extras!
Xmas Eve party went great. So much so, we are all going to try to make it a tradition. Xmas day was so incredibly boring…again…,at BiL house, we are seriously considering taking off Xmas day somewhere for my family…maybe Mexico.
@HotCanary : We can seat 8 around the table, 9 if I bring out an auxiliary table, and I could probably do 10 in a pinch (although S would have to bring up some chairs and silverware to help out), so this year’s 7 was a cinch – and one of the “extras” (I really should not have used that word) was a saint, who patiently chatted with my sometimes discombobulated mother while we finished getting dinner together. I felt like I was in an episode of The Waltons. Good night, JohnBoy!
H and I went out for a dim sum breakfast with 3 of our 4 sons. The 4th declined to join us. Our D, who had initially planned the breakfast, got an unexpected opportunity to spend the holiday with her bf’s family - Down Under! I could not say no.
I then took a nap on the couch, which is something I NEVER do.
We so enjoyed the dim sum that we are going to make it a tradition.
It was me, Mr R, my parents, our neighbor who we don’t particularly like but who was otherwise going to spend the holidays alone, and a new friend from grad school who has been disowned by his family since he came out as trans.
We had a hodgepodge of food but everyone seemed to really enjoy themselves. Prime rib, tons of veggies, cheese tray, and some other things thrown in.
We had a lot of fun with the new VR set that we got a few weeks ago.
My friend thanked me profusely for inviting him to join us and he said my family made him feel welcome- something he’s not used to. It both broke my heart and made me beam.
I don’t really know how it went. Nobody said anything. Usually, my S and D have to spend either Christmas or Christmas Eve with their dad, but their dad was out of town, so we had two “parties.” There were the same 8 of us both days: me, D, S, S’s GF, my mom, my dad, my two brothers. Saturday evening, I planned a casual dinner and did most of the cooking. For entertainment, we played bingo for prizes that I had purchased. I made up the rules and it was such that everyone ended up with one prize so they all went home with something. My family does not exchange gifts (I give my kids $$$), so the “prizes” were the only gifts involved. They were not fancy. No one commented whether they had fun or enjoyed the dinner or wanted to do it again next year. So I don’t know.
Sunday was the typical Christmas dinner. My brothers, both single, ate as fast as they could and left. Which is nothing new. One usually stands in the kitchen with me saying he’s starving to death and I feel so rushed to get it on the table, and then so rushed to start any games before they leave. They did leave immediately after dinner Sunday while the rest of us played the family tradition card game for a prize which I had purchased.
The only ones who seemed appreciative were my children. Son’s GF thanked me sincerely before they left for their 200 mile drive home. Daughter stayed and helped me clean up before she went home.
Everyone was pleasant and there was no drama, but I feel unappreciated. And I’m tired.
I’m exhausted! I still have another night of Chanukah with my kids tomorrow night. I told them to not be disappointed but I’m not cooking another meal!
