<p>I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this. </p>
<p>Anyway, I am feeling really tired and hopeless lately. You see, it was always my dream (since 8th grade) to go to a ‘top’ college. (Harvard, Yale, etc.) </p>
<p>In high school, I worked really hard. I took 11 AP, got national AP scholar, 2 times Siemens semifinalist, national merit, took several advanced college courses (even a junior level college courses) etc. However, I didn’t do very good in school. (but in top 10%) </p>
<p>But when it became time for the applications, I totally messed up or something. My parents, all of a sudden, MADE me submit my applications BEFORE November 20. As a result, I had to rush really bad and stuff. Horrible essays, etc. </p>
<p>Needless to say, I was rejected by all the ‘top’ universities. And now, I feel completely hopeless. I worked so hard my entire life for a change to get into a ‘good college’ and all of a sudden, all that work is gone to waste. </p>
<p>Now, I have to attend a really small university, where the acceptance rate is some 99% (I suppose 1% might be rejected.) </p>
<p>What makes be really depressed is that my classmates all around me got into top universities (Yale, Harvard, MIT, etc.) and they didn’t work nearly as hard as me! (I don’t mean to show off or anything. Their is no point in that. I just want to tell you how I feel.) </p>
<p>I honestly cannot imagine myself motivated anymore. All my motivation is drained. </p>
<p>I am thinking of joining the Maoist rebels in India (although I live in the USA). I always wanted to obtain a high level government position, and that would be very difficult now following the conventional path. I’ve been reading about the Maoist lately, and they seem very lucrative and seductive. Also, the Maoist in Nepal succeed in taking over the government. And I read The Economist regularly, and they usually have an article of a government coup. Coups happen quite often around the world, and to be part of one is like a dream. Just imagine trying to topple over a government and, all of a sudden, becoming one of the most powerful people in the world!</p>
<p>Do you think I should join the Maoist? Also, does anyone feel the same way? Any advice? </p>
<p>I feel so confused. All of a sudden, everything I worked for suddenly fell apart. Joining the rebels will give me some hope.</p>