<p>Did anyone’s kid not go to high school graduation, and how did they end up feeling about that?</p>
<p>My daughter has to decide by tomorrow and she’s up in the air about it. The choice is graduation or going to a national competition in her sport. Here are some details:</p>
<ul>
<li><p>Graduation - small school, about 100 graduating seniors, second graduating class for this school, community feeling among graduates, supportive faculty, no valedictorian but big screen shows a baby picture, quote, and recorded audio message as each kid walks across the stage, maybe parties later but I don’t know about that yet.</p></li>
<li><p>Nationals - first time to qualify for youth nationals and last chance before leaving high school, didn’t get to train much in this particular event before competing but did well anyway, preparing for the nationals would mean a chance to learn more skills and get stronger, she plans to continue the sport in college but will not compete in this event, though she could do it later on her own.</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Any thoughts?</p>
<p>My neighbor’s daughter skipped her college graduation this month to play in the conference softball championship. They ended up getting second place but won a bid to the NCAA Div II tournament and just won their regional yesterday. I just got off the phone with the neighbor, and they’re on their way to Houston this week for the Big Dance!!!</p>
<p>She is considering getting a master’s so I guess she thinks she’ll have another shot at a ceremony. She went to this school on a softball scholarship, so, obviously, the sport is really important to her.</p>
<p>But no advice from me! Just a story. Good luck with the decision.</p>
<p>My husband did not attend his hs graduation. It just was not important to him. He made plans to go to Europe with a friend. He was very excited about it, and did not give any thought to hs graduation. I asked him what the rush was to head to Europe. There really wasn’t any rush, just the exuberance of an 18 y/o who was heading off for a summer adventure. He has not given too much thought about missing his graduation, and never expresses regrets. I suppose if he had to do it over again, he would have attended.</p>
<p>The thread (linked below) may be helpful to you or your daughter. It is one that I wrote last year, when I trying to make the same decision.
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/354645-last-minute-h-s-graduation-dilemma.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/354645-last-minute-h-s-graduation-dilemma.html</a></p>
<p>As you can see, I did not attend my high school graduation last year. I was very conflicted about the decision, but have not regretted it much. The only time I have experienced some regret is when my parents expressed a little disappointment after it was over. They originally had both agreed that going to my college graduation would be an applicable alternative, but told me later they would have preferred I would have just gone like a “normal” kid. I guess the only advice I have for you, as the parent of a senior, is to be honest. If it really does matter to you, tell them outright. Best of luck to your daughter with whichever choice she makes :)</p>
<p>How do you feel about it? If she does not have strong feelings about celebrating the ending with the friends, that is usually the big draw for the kids. HS graduation is much more about the friends than college one is. Without that it seems then that the graduation is for the parents. A way to celebrate the end and the beginning of the next sage. Will you feel you missed seeing her cross the stage? Are Grandparents involved?</p>
<p>My daughter (high school athlete and D-1 in college) would have skipped graduation in a heartbeat, in favor of participating in even just a regional competition, let alone a national…</p>
<p>Thanks very much to all of you. The thread from last year is a bonus - I should have known that this very topic would have already been discussed :-).</p>
<p>I don’t have strong feelings about the graduation myself. I told my daughter before she went to the regionals that if she made it to nationals and decided to go, we (her parents and a grandma) could still go to graduation and tell her how it went, if she wanted us to. But maybe one of us would need to go to the nationals with her. Anyway, my main question is how she might feel later if she makes one or the other choice. Of course she’s the only one who can know that, and she’ll only know later on. What makes it hard is that she would really like to do both.</p>
<p>Well…we didn’t have to make your choice…but we did have to make a different choice. DD had the opportunity to travel with a music group on an international tour that began the day before her brother’s HS graduation. She chose the tour…her brother didn’t care a bit…and neither did the grandparents. We didn’t care either. DD could not be at DS’s college graduation…again…no problem. Choices choices…that is what life is all about. The reality is you can’t be in two places at once. Re: closure…have a nice picnic for your daughter and her friends to celebrate the graduations sometime after graduation weekend (when there are always too many parties anyway!!).</p>
<p>My son didn’t attend his high school graduation because he didn’t feel like it. There was no conflict with another activity. He just didn’t want to go.</p>
<p>This didn’t bother our family. We’re not heavily into ceremonies, anyway. And I don’t think he ever regretted not going (although he is going to go to his college graduation later this month).</p>
<p>I’ve taught a number of kids who played (or are currently playing) Div. I football who skipped graduation in order to start summer workouts or be able to participate in spring practice.</p>
<p>I skipped my grad school graduation for the simple reason that I finished up mid-year and had already moved 500 miles away and started my new job by time the ceremonies rolled around. I suppose that it would have been mildly fun to wear the fancy cap, gown, and hood that new PhDs get to wear, but it just wasn’t worth the trouble and expense IMO. Other members of my family seemed to be much more disappointed than I ever was.</p>
<p>I skipped my college graduation. I just wasn’t interested in going. I haven’t regretted it but it was a large Uni and not the same as a small high school event.</p>
<p>My older daughter graduated from a small private school last year (125 graduating class). Most of those kids have known each other since grade school. It was a very special moment for all of us as a community. We have all watched each other’s kids grow up. We were very happy to cross the finishing line together - some of us thought for sure we weren’t going make it through middle school. I think graduation is more than just for the graduate. It’s a right of passage and an event for the whole family to celebrate. There will always be another competition or business deal, but there will only be one high school graduation.</p>