<p>Curious about several posts in this thread…Some have kept their student on the parent’s health insurance past graduation. Perhaps it varies based on policy, but I thought the law dictated that parents could continue to carry a dependent only until age 23 and then only if the student is a full-time student. Inquiring minds want to know…</p>
<p>^That is our case—She will be 23 and out of grad school next year and off our policy.
(for car insurance!) She carries her own health insurance at thru school.</p>
<p>panhandlegal - it depends on the employer and what their policies regarding adult children are. With my H’s employer, our children can remain on his health insurance through age 25 as long as we’re supporting them by providing more than 50% of their living expenses. Doesn’t matter whether or not they’re in school or not. i.e. - D2 is living in another state, working an unpaid internship, while job hunting (which is very painful right now), so we’ve given her a monthly allowance, that is probably much less than what she will eventually make when she lands a job, but enough to live on. Since we’re providing all this (oh, yes, since her internship is unpaid, we had to co-sign her lease), she qualifies to stay on our health insurance. </p>
<p>I guess we kind of view this internship as a pseudo grad school experience. She’s getting good experience without getting paid, and doesn’t have an obvious lapse on her resume as she continues to job hunt. She has good health insurance, lives in a relatively safe area (has foregone a car… doesn’t need one in Boston) and lives in an area where there are way more alumni connections than there are where we live.</p>
<p>My view of helping out a post-college kid has evolved, too, and is nowhere I thought it would be two years ago. I was ready to cut her off completely when she graduated (May 2008), but realized that these economic times require a different strategy. We’ll see what happens to D2 when she graduates in 2011.</p>
<p>Happy to see we’re not the only ones still helping financially. We are still paying health and car insurance for one kid, which is quite a lot of money these days, and truthfully, wouldn’t have expected to still be paying it, but we are. He always has a job, but doesn’t make much. The other college grad has a high paying job (and also no car!), and pays everything himself, and has health insurance through his job – we still pay for the cell phone, though.</p>
<p>These responses are exactly what I expected from this forum</p>
<p>When I was 24 I discovered I had poor vision. I didn’t have an eye exam for six years so I didn’t know it. I’ll never forget slipping on a pair of glasses and seeing individual leaves on trees. I went to the dentist when I needed a root canal. I’ll never forget what a crisis it was to have a clutch go out or to need new tires. I didn’t recieve a penny from home. They couldn’t afford it. Jump ahead thirty years and I’m successful. I might have done even better with support or I might not have done as well. I’ll never know. What I do know is I have a daughter and her health and saftey is very important to me. Also avoiding taxes is important to me. I will take advantage of whatever laws allow me to gift to my daughter money upon her college graduation.</p>
<p>There is a fine line between enabling adult children and simply making life easier! Replacing a clutch and providing dental care aren’t enabling in my book. </p>
<p>Reminds me of my dear, old, sweet neighbor who got more joy out of buying the grandkids a new car or paying their tuition bill out of the blue than you can imagine! Said he “couldn’t take it with him” and it made him feel like Santa Claus! His philosophy was to help the kids out when they really need it rather than wait until after his death to give them his estate. </p>
<p>teriwtt, thanks for the clarification.</p>
<p>We have 2 that have reached post college status and are very fortunate that they both had full-time employment within 1 month of graduation. We helped them both with the initial expenses in setting up apartments (deposits and furnishings) and gently used cars. They both chose to get 2 br places with roommates so they could have nicer apartments with rents they could afford. Since moving out, they have been financially independent although we do pay for their plane tickets home. I love to send them gift cards for dinners out and other little luxuries just because. If a major expense came up, we would help them. They were both very eager and proud to become financially independent.</p>
<p>If they had not found jobs quickly, I’m sure we would have done whatever was necessary.</p>
<p>S1 at 26 has been off our payroll since college graduation. He works full time and takes out loans to attend grad school part-time. </p>
<p>S2 is in his last year of grad school. Tuition is mostly scholarship with a few loans. He tries very hard to pay living expenses himself, but NYC is expensive. I worry about short cuts he takes - like not eating well enough. I send care packages regularly to supplement his grocery money. He doesn’t like to ask for help. He is NOT demanding to live like we do. He is also still on our insurance, which is no biggie, since he’s a full-time student - no further cost to us. He graduates in May, and I have no idea what will happen. That is one huge question mark. We, of course, are hoping he will land a full-time job with benefits.</p>
<p>D is a whole 'nother question mark, but we’ve got another year to figure something out. I would welcome her home, but I doubt that is what she wants.</p>
<p>Our oldest has been pretty much self sufficient since graduating. I paid for one small student loan that we agreed upon when he first started. He’s now married but he’s still on our family plan with his cell phone. $10, no big deal.</p>
<p>S2 is finishing up grad school that provides him with a small stipend. He’s also found a few small odd jobs on the side that pad his pocket. Enough so that he can pay his own rent, car insurance and incidentals. Occasionally we will spring for groceries. He doesn’t ask, but I want him to eat well. He is covered on my health insurance too. Fortunately, my employer covers students up to age 27, as long as they are full time students.</p>
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<p>By the way, having D1 on our health insurance is no extra cost at this point, since D2 is only 20, and has another year and a half of college. There is no difference in the deductions from H’s paycheck, whether or not you have one child, or two or more on the policy. The choices are basically individual, individual and spouse, individual, spouse and dependents. </p>
<p>I should also add that initially she had a two-bedroom apt. with one other girl, and they recently took on a third roommate and moved to a three-bedroom so that their rent is less per person, although each still has their own bedroom.</p>
<p>I am jealous of those who can keep their kids on their health insurance plans.
Ours (military) kicks them off when they’re no longer a full time college student.
In our son’s case, that was at age 21.</p>
<p>We have learned the differences in coverage between the group plan and what we pay for the kids on their own. Coverage is less with premiums higher. We’ve been blessed not to have to discover the hard way all the holes in our own coverage, but I’ve really come to appreciate that what we had was better (comparatively) than I thought.</p>
<p>D doesn’t have a car right now, but we still keep paying some insurance for when she’s at home or has to drive when out of town on clinical rotations. S’s car is 11 years old, but we’re still paying insurance. </p>
<p>I understand (and agree) with much that’s been said about “enabling”. However, as my husband says, “you don’t kick them when they’re down”. So, we’ll continue to do what we can while it’s needed and as long as we don’t feel they’re abusing the gifts.</p>
<p>We were fortunate to have health insurance that kept our kids insured until age 25 as long as they were full-time students. Proving that became a major headache, since full-time for a graduate student is not the same as full-time for an undergrad.</p>
<p>When my son missed his mark for his master’s by a semester, he came up a little short in terms of hours. For a period of a few months, it appeared that we would have to pay COBRA coverage for him, which is quite pricey. And for those of you whose kids qualify for private insurance (no matter how good or bad the coverage), be thankful. My son did not qualify due to an autoimmune thyroid disorder that is easily treated. They pretty much won’t take anyone with anything other than perfect medical history. That left our only option to be COBRA, and as we all know that doesn’t last forever.</p>
<p>We were very glad when he found a job in his chosen career field locally so that he could finish his master’s in the evening. The best news was that he was eligible for an insurance plan.</p>
<p>We can complain all day about the economy, but I think the biggest challenge facing our young adults will ultimately be insurance coverage.</p>
<p>I graduated from college in 2008 and immediately began working full-time and living in an apartment with one roommate.</p>
<p>My parents have continued to pay my cell phone (mom and I share a plan) and EZPass bills. My dad pays for car maintenance. I know if I ever really get into money trouble, they will help me out but I will be required to pay them back when possible.</p>
<p>I pay my rent and utilities, auto and renters’ insurance, gym membership, and of course all of my credit card bills. I also contribute 5% of my paycheck to my 401k each month. I’m fortunate that my employer covers 100% of my HMO cost, but I am responsible for copays, prescriptions, etc. I think that being financially independent and responsible is an important and necessary lesson. It makes me feel great when I get a raise, or I save up for a vacation or nice pair of shoes I’ve been really wanting!</p>
<p>My parents are very generous with smaller gestures that mean a lot to me (a gift certificate for a manicure before my first business trip; a nice bottle of wine when they come to visit). I’m really thankful for those.</p>
<p>S1 has moved into his own apartment and is paying everything … other than his cell phone bill which I think he hoped I didn’t notice! I did finally notice and pointed out last week that he needed to take this on too. I was happy to help with some of the IKEA bills for his apartment.</p>
<p>We will help pay back the college loans for a while. The monthly cost on those loans is WAY WAY less than the monthly college tuition checks!! Both kiddos are still on our car insurance. We helped with an individual health insurance plan for a month or two until the employer contribution went into affect. We also sometimes (as a treat) will put a small “donation” into the checking account. And we (like others) are fairly generous with birthday and holiday gifts…and things like clothing purchases when the kidlets are here.</p>
<p>S gets kicked off our family plan health insurance when he turns 22, even tho he’s still in school (unless we could prove disability).</p>
<p>We purchased him the university insurance & will keep that for him–it will cover him thru Aug 2010 (he graduates 5/10). After that, hopefully he will have either grad school to attend (we hope paid) or a job (has been interviewing). Will see how much help he needs–he has savings that should help him, as well as funds he’s earned in college. If he doesn’t do one of those things, he can pay for GAP insurance from his U for up to 18 months @ about $400/month. If he does one of the other things, he should be covered by insurance.</p>
<p>He just got the car he had been begging for (it’s pretty old but our mechanic says it’s sound). He will be handling insurance & maintenance, tho we spent quite a bit fixing it up before shipping it to him. He’s also paying AAA, “just in case.”</p>
<p>D will also be covered until she turns 22.</p>
<p>I think it’s very important for people to have continuous health insurance coverage, especially if they have pre-existing health conditions (like my kids do), otherwise it can be VERY expensive and scary & tough to get coverage down the road.</p>
<p>It makes sense to me to help our loved ones if we are in a position to and they are being responsible in their choices. I also prefer my kids to live in places that are safer for their physical health, and sometimes that does cost a bit more and may be in a nicer area. We feel fortunate that we are able to do so without a major sacrifice.</p>
<p>My S’s attitude towards support sounds a lot like IAMSOUNSURE’s. Because he is thrifty, I can feel good about little gifts. I don’t think he has much money left over after paying rent & car insurance. I’m pleased he could use my miles to fly to Europe. If there are major expenses for his cat, car, health, I’d be glad to cover those. Buying him clothes is my luxory.</p>
<p>S was removed from my health insurance when he began college, and he wasn’t allowed to return under my plan. He had COBRA for 2 months, @$330. He had to go to ER for the flu, and the COBRA more than paid for itself. </p>
<p>I know how hard it was to live on a graduate school stipend, and I’m sure my son appreciates some treats. My parents didn’t understand, and I was too proud to ask for assistance. I talk more openly with DS about finances. We all live and learn.</p>
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<p>Hmm. Maybe this is a function of either the people I know or the area that I live in, but I’ve seen something different. A lot of our parents were able to buy single-family houses within a couple of years of graduating, while most of us expect that we <em>might</em> be able to afford a small condo five or ten years out. Many of our parents didn’t live with roommates after they graduated; almost all of us who are single do. The large majority of us are not living lavishly, and not expecting to live like our parents for a long while, if ever.</p>
<p>After I graduated in 2007, I was briefly still on my mom’s family cell phone plan, but dropped it a few months later when I got my own plan and gave my old phone to my youngest brother. My parents furnished my bedroom in my first apartment as a graduation gift. My mom will occasionally give us gifts unprompted, and is willing to pay for about half of my trips to visit her. That’s about it. I was very lucky to have a good job with good benefits when I graduated - a privilege that has been harder to come by for this year’s grads.</p>
<p>Only with care packages.
After 7 years across country and foreign lands, he’s now only 200 miles from home. He now gets bigger care packages and enough to share with his 4 other housemates.</p>