<p>It was the prompt about complacency hindering improvement. The prompt statement made it sound like it was talking about improving society and self improvement, but the question seemed to ask primarily about self improvement. </p>
<p>I used the American Revolution, women’s suffrage, and a few inventors as my examples… obviously referring to the improvement of society. While I did interpret it as complacency in terms of progress, I made it more about progress of society than progress of self. The essay itself was extremely well written… But will the topically question hurt me?</p>
<p>I do not believe that it hurt too much, as it was virtually related to the topic. My examples were about Ghandi and Steve Jobs, i wrote like 10 detailed sentence paragraphs on each. I was about to write my conclusion and then the proctor announced that time is up.</p>
<p>Yeah. It’s like the prompt and intro statement didn’t match… Got an 11 last time, wasn’t as well written, but was topical… just kinda ****es me off that the intro listed 3 (self other society) yet the question only self other</p>
<p>But then again, at that rate, ours are just as topical because jobs/Gandhi improved society more than themselves</p>
<p>I didnt really mention anything concerning society. I mainly talked about how they had goals, and every time they met a goal, they wanted to improve, and that made them not as content as others would be, since they always aim to be better.</p>
<p>I wrote about the diary of Anne frank… And how it reveals her thoughts and personal life during the Nazi’s… HOW BAD DID I SCREW IP :’(</p>
<p>I wrote purely about self improvement for the most part and then one paragraph on general society improvement (Revolution)</p>
<p>I wrote about the Gutenberg press and innovation, school motivation and improvement, and the constitution, and s couple amendments like women’s suffrage</p>
<p>I wrote about articles of confederation and then I made up an entire thing about some scientist who studied algae. Wrote until the last line. Like my conclusion was that last line lol.</p>
<p>my thesis was that dissatisfaction promotes improvement… and I used Great Expectations, Martin Luther and Howard Schultz. does that work or did I mess up the prompt?</p>
<p>Who had the privacy essay?? Would “diary of Anne frank” be an irrelevant example???</p>
<p>All right I’m really worried. So here’s a summary of my essay…</p>
<p>Basic into bla bla bla pretty generic stuff while not totally formulaic…</p>
<p>1st example:
A basketball player from Miami is exceptionally gifted. He’s so good that he becomes a star on varsity, but things get to his head and he doesn’t think he needs the practice so he stops practicing at home. Eventually he is no longer the star of the team and he doesn’t receive any college scholarships.</p>
<p>2nd example:
There’s a business man in the 1940s who owns a business called “Goff Insurance” and he is really successful. He’s so successful that he grows content with his situation and stops trying to improve his company and sits on what he has. Later, a rival insurance agency beats his out and his company fails entirely</p>
<p>3rd example:
Alexander the Great conquerors the known world because he never grows content. His ambition causes him to constantly improve and achieve great things.</p>
<p>But my conclusion was weak af. one sentence. This is pretty much it:
To reiterate, when one is content, he or she may not be able to improve and may become worse off like James Curtis (basketball player), but if one doesn’t grow content, he or she can achieve great things like Alexander the Great.</p>
<p>With that weak ass conclusion do you guys think I could possibly score a 12 if the rest was pretty well written?</p>
<p>I wrote a solid intro paragraph and used Kate Chopin’s “The Awakening”, the U.S/Soviet arms race during the Cold War era, and GMOs for examples. I was glad to be able to include an ideal set of examples (one literary, one current events, one historical) and am pretty happy with my conclusion as well. Actually managed to write a half-decent five paragraph essay, and I didn’t leave any space at all on the two pages provided, so I think I have a shot at a 12. The Arms Race as an example is pretty weak though simply because the Cold War is an overused example, but hey it certainly could have gone worse</p>
<p>I had the privacy essay. I think I messed it up too… I wrote about To Kill A Mockingbird and how Jem and Scout did not respect Boo Radley’s privacy, and how this led to them painting a false picture of someone that they didn’t actually know. Then I went on to connect this point to the prompt… I don’t think Anne Frank would be a bad choice as long as you addressed the prompt. Idk, I found it difficult to brainstorm for this essay…</p>
<p>Thank God I didn’t get the privacy essay. That could’ve doomed me. It’s much harder than “can content prevent improvement?”</p>