Last year, I was waitlisted at 4 schools. This year I was rejected at 3 and waitlisted at 1. There have been teachers that have supported me throughout both years, and I don’t know how I’m supposed to tell my results to them. It just feels so bad!
I’m so sorry. I think a simple email that says something like “Your support I’ve the past two years has meant a lot to me. I didn’t achieve my boarding school dream but I want to thank you for everything you’ve done to help me. I’ll be doing X next year.”
I’m sorry you didn’t get the decisions you wanted. Your teachers and friends who supported you know the possible outcomes. I’m sure they’ll be supportive when you tell them the results too. If you don’t want to tell them in person maybe you can you send them an email before you go back to school. Thank them for their help and encouragement and tell them that you’ll be returning to your current school next year. They’ll understand.
You didn’t fail or let anyone down. You simply weren’t one of the few to be accepted out of thousands of applicants. Like the others have said, a heartfelt note (preferable) or email to let them know the results and thank them for their help and support would be appropriate and, I’m sure, appreciated.
You could write a note if telling them in person is hard. I would suggest saying that you were not accepted and are disappointed. And that applying gave you a good opportunity to learn more about yourself, and that one of the things you learned is that you have terrific people around you who are supporting you as you work toward your dreams. Thank them for being one of those people.
A couple of things: one practical and the other philosophical. On the practical side, I would speak to your current adviser or your current head of school (assuming you have a good relationship with one of them) and have him or her lob a call into your waitlist school to advocate for you. He or she can provide some additional context around your boarding school dreams and the decision outcomes of the last two years that will be unbiased and potentially help the waitlist to become an admit.
On the philosophical side, if you feel shame having to tell people about rejections or waitlists, or you think you’re letting your advocates down, remember that things like school admissions, or job rejections, or any of the other myriad challenges in your life are skirmishes, battles that everybody wins and loses - everybody. They are NOT the war and they sure as hell don’t define who you are. The secret is to keep pushing in the direction that you want to go with your life, stay fully engaged and keep smiling, do good deeds for others as your teachers did for you. You tell them, “I didn’t get in, but thank you so much for being in my corner. I’m grateful for your help. It’s time for me to look forward.”
^^ One of the best responses in the history of College Confidential. Agree 100%.
You have already received the advice you need, but I want to add: remember for yourself that you were brave and took a risk - twice. You enlarged yourself. It’s really something to be proud of.
@Totorocinnamon03, first of all congratulations on having the courage and grit to apply to boarding school two years in a row. Not many young adults would have the determination to do so. I am sincerely sorry you didn’t get the result you wanted. You have received some wonderful advice on this thread. I wish you all the best and have no doubt you will succeed in life.
@dogsmama1997 @austinmshauri @CTMom21 @gardenstategal @ThacherParent @twinsmama @janehoya thank you all for your kind words! I’ve decided to send an email instead of face to face because I honestly think I won’t be able to get through the conversation without embarrassing myself.
@Totorocinnamon03 email will work just as well as in-person. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. Good luck!
My child was waitlisted at all eight schools. (First time applying) Anyway, he goes to a small private school and is the only one without an acceptance next year. He was embarrassed and afraid to tell his peers. What he decided to do was just send his classmates an email explaining and asking for their respect while processing the emotions associate with this. His classmates who have not always been very supportive really rallied around him and sent the most beautiful emails.
Point is, you have nothing to be ashamed of. Good for you for taking chances. I suspect you will be very success someday soon.
@momensa, I was in your son’s situation for college and can relate to his feelings. I am so glad his classmates rallied around him. FWIW, everything worked out just fine for me as I’m sure it will for your son. Good luck!
@janehoya Thank you so much for your kind words. Not sure what FWIW means. Is there a place I can find an acronym list. ?♀️
For What It’s Worth.
Google? Although I personally think that Urban Dictionary is your friend.
FWIW = For What It’s Worth
For what it’s worth.
I have been reading your posts and was impressed by your sincerely, honesty, and candidness. Being international student, Asian, w FA are all tough call. You should have also tried schools which have dedicated scholarship programs for your nationality (I know Choate (they may exclude students from international schools) but may be others too). But I guess you have learnt a lot from the experience and the processes which you will use for your other life experiences. I am sure, with your quality, you will succeed even though you did not get in BS at this moment. Many different paths will bring you to what you really want to achieve in your life. Good luck.
@doranobi thank you for your kind words!