How do you handle food allergies, food preferences, and picky eaters when hosting?

Parent Cafe Food
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My nephew is allergic to eggs and wheat. Since it’s very hard to find a good birthday cake with these restrictions, my sister made him an ice cream cake every year with egg free ice cream, you can do it with dairy free as well.How do you handle food allergies, food preferences, and picky eaters when hosting? - #139 by mom60

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143

Thanks, he decided he wants a crisp and she has several on her website.

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144

Question for the gluten-free gang–my sister was just diagnosed with Celiac (at 65). This previously happened about fifteen years ago with my mom (at 80!). So I have had some experience, but it’s been a while, and products have changed, and I think improved.

Looking for the best gluten-free stuffing cubes – not completely made, but like the bread cubes you might buy from Pepperidge Farm as a basis.

Thanks for any suggestions.

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Aliea’s is okay. I don’t like Gillian’s. I’ve just started making my own. For my GF stuffing, I add lots of other stuff. Some years it’s a sausage stuffing, I once did oyster stuffing, one year pecans and cranberries. GF stuffing is “fine”, but I like great.

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146

Trader Joe’s is good.

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Oh I didn’t think to look in trader Joe’s. Thanks!

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148

Thank you!

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Trader Joe’s packages aren’t that big and when they are gone, they’re gone. Start looking soon and buy two.

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Pretty much they are just gf breadcrumbs with seasoning. We’ve found using gf bread and following a regular stuffing recipe works much better.

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151

I’m reluctantly hosting Thanksgiving again this year. I’m dreading my two options. One is to do the menu we have always done and have my son make sure his son doesn’t eat anything he’s allergic to. They bring his food to all events so it might work but my DIL will be stressed. Option 2 which is probably the safest is to go over the menu with a detailed look to rule out allergens and find new recipes. I’m just tired and that thought is overwhelming.

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152

Not sure if you have a whole foods near you, but you might be able to order some of their Thanksgiving sides and not need to do as much cooking.

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153

That is what my husband suggested. I have to ask what ingredients they use. The allergens are dairy, egg, sesame and mustard. Dairy is a hard one for a lot of Thanksgiving foods. Last year we didn’t make accommodations but GS was so young and not,icing around that it worked out as long as everyone washed their hands after eating. He’s now mobile and the cousins have gotten bigger and they aren’t old enough to totally get the wash hands before touching their cousin or the toys and no running around with foods.

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They have their catering menu up if you want to check it out.

They have a whole vegan menu that might work well.

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Could you ask your son and DIL to vet your recipes and provide alternatives where needed? Otherwise, if you post your usual menu, we might be able to offer suggestions.

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Thanks I hadn’t seen that. Looks like I can get some sides but still would need to make the turkey stuffing and some type of potato dairy free. We are usually 25-30 people and a meal totally vegan would not go over well.

I’m going to talk to my daughter in law and ask her what she thinks.

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157

The New York Times recipe for olive oil mashed potatoes is good if you like garlic mashed potatoes. It uses just five ingredients: yellow potatoes, garlic, salt, water, and olive oil. Otherwise, replace the dairy will an approved butter-substitute and either broth or potato water.

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If it was my grandson and I was hosting, I’d just bite the bullet now and adapt the recipes. Presumably this is just going to get harder as he gets older. If there is a family favorite or two that are particularly hard to adapt, I might have one or two that have to be avoided, but otherwise just starting making everything safe for him to eat. I’d also outsource and not take it all on myself, but creating a safe, stress free environment is just going to help long term in a whole lot of different ways.

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159

Those seem do-able – dairyhas lots of alternatives these days.

But, I would always prefer to be asked (my son and DH are celiac). It is super stressful to monitor other people’s kitchens, so maybe you could agree on some sides and mains as excluding the allergens, and exile the allergy foods to a separate part of the kitchen or something? Definitely ask what theywant to have happen.

We have also sometimes had family clear us a spot for the food we bring, and we serve from that spot rather than risk xcontam at the table. It kinda depends on the kind of allergic reaction and the age. We used to use painter’s tape and a cover for the plates to mark “our” counter and fridge space.

Keep in mind , you are sending a message to the grandson that his issues are not the end of the world, or that he is an inconvenient freak of nature. You have to live with this for one visit. He has to manage with it for the rest of his life, so help him and his parents meet the challenge.

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160

Dairy-free Thanksgiving is totally achievable. Just need to think outside the box a little bit. for example:

  • mashed potatoes - instead of making with butter & milk, use margarine & a non-dairy milk substitute
  • green bean casserole - swap this entire recipe out for fresh green beans not in casserole form. Can take ~10 min in a pan on the stove to make. Or instead make something like glazed carrots (also 10 min in a big frying pan on the stove)…you’ll need 1-2 TB of honey, New Mexico chile powder, salt & pepper, some olive oil, and a little water. Put oil in the hot pan & carrots, put ~ 1/4 cup of water in pan w/the carrots. Cover & cook for ~7-8 min on medium heat. Remove cover from pan. Add spices & honey and stir until the remaining water boils off. Serve.
  • butter on the turkey skin - rub olive oil on it instead.
  • anything that requires butter - use margarine instead.

We have a good friend coming for Thanksgiving. She’s got celiac disease. She & her husband have come to our house for the holidays many times and she never gets sick with cross contamination or anything. Generally speaking, this is what I do:

  • Turkey - read the label when buying to check for gluten.
  • stuffing/dressing - Friend doesn’t eat it. I make couple of bags of Pepperidge Farm stuffing for our immediate family and we keep it separate and don’t mix serving spoons or anything.
  • mashed potatoes - definitely no gluten in this
  • gravy - I thicken the gravy with corn starch. The gravy doesn’t turn out as thick as it normally is when I make it with regular flour, but it tastes just as good. I use broth made from the turkey neck, gizzards, and other vegetables & supplement with some canned chicken broth, too.
  • 2 kinds of vegetables - usually glazed carrots and green beans. I never make green bean casserole because I don’t like how it tastes. Friend doesn’t care for green bean casserole either so it’s no big deal.
  • appetizers/snack foods while we all wait for dinner to be ready - processed meats like salami (a brand that I know friend has eaten before), couple of different types of cheese, vegetables & something to dip it in. Plus tortilla chips & Costco salsa (no gluten in it).
  • dessert - nobody but me likes pie. I buy myself an apple pie. My kids have ice cream. Friend makes this crustless cheesecake stuff that’s really good. We will often totally skip a formal dessert and instead we’ll roast marshmallows in the fire pit outside in the evening after dinner.
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Just for everyone else – check the labels - broth often has gluten in it.

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