How easy is it to make new friends?

<p>While I'm going to be a HS senior, I'm really curious about this. During the summer, I went to NSLC for 10 days, and I found it incredibly easy (even though I was really shy at first) to make new friends because everyone was so friendly and open to meeting new people. In general, will it be that easy to make friends as a freshman, or will people be a little less open?</p>

<p>I haven't actually started college yet (September!), but I went to my school's required overnight orientation. I'm ridiculously shy in real life, but once you realize everyone's in the same position as you--alone and awkward and not knowing anybody--then everything becomes a lot easier. Everyone in my hall was really close by the end of the two days and we've been keeping in touch via facebook since then, even planning a reunion once school starts.
The only thing I'd recommend is to be a little more outgoing than normal. Don't be afraid to say hi, and I think it'll go well for you. Good luck as a senior!</p>

<p>I think it depends on the person. I've found it difficult.</p>

<p>yea it does depend on the person. I often unintentionally switch back and forth. For a while ill be really outgoing, everybodies best friend it seems like, and everyone really enjoys talking with me and its just a really outgoing and spontaneous time. But then ill switch, ill be really introverted, avoidant, shy. and when all these people come out to find me or try to socialize with me they are still there same old self but for some reason i do not feel interested/ or i do not want to talk to them, or i become paranoid of there motives. then i just feel sorry for them.</p>

<p>that sounds like someone that you wouldnt be able to trust, or like a deranged sociopath. but im pretty sure im not anti social, and i do feel genuine emotions. thats just how my personality is i dont understand it either! my best friends dont understand it but accept it and ive known them for 15 years and we still talk.</p>

<p>Varies from person to person and it depends on the 2 people who are trying to become friends. If someone sticks to themselves and never wants to chill with you and is just in general being anti social then no matter how hard you try they probably won't become your friend lol. I'd suggest just being outgoing and have an open feeling about you so that people won't be afraid to approach you.</p>

<p>Extremely easy. People saying it's hard generally are just too anxious to even try. "hard" would imply that you've talked to people and they just blow you off, while I think most people here who say it's "hard" didnt even give themselves a chance. You miss every shot you dont take. You have nothing to lose by starting up a conversation with a random freshman - you're all new, you're all in the same boat, and you're all looking to make new friends.</p>

People saying it's hard generally are just too anxious to even try.


<p>negative 10char</p>

<p>It can depend on a number of things. you. the people you are interacting with. the circumstances and situation. It was a lot easier for me in college (will since I am still in college it still applies). Be yourself and as long as your not some jerk face, you will make friends.</p>

<p>The first few days, everyone's really desperate to make friends, so even shy people might find it easy. You can talk to whoever and it's not weird. After the first few days it reverts more into a normal mode...not to say people aren't friendly but they probably won't just approach you. You can approach them, though, and you can totally make friends, even if it's not as blatantly easy (or easy seeming) as it was the first few weeks. It's still totally possible. I made all my friends later on in my freshman year, the people I hung out with right away I don't even talk to anymore (and I think that's a somewhat common experience).</p>

<p>Note that you can't be ridiculously shy and avoid everyone the first few weeks and expect friends to drop into your lap. You have to be equally friendly back. I think that's often the problem when people say they can't make friends - they're too shy and holding back and they expect people to just come to them. They do a bit the first few weeks of school, but you need to reciprocate.</p>

<p>Things to note:</p>

<p>(1) Cliques exist everywhere so don't be surprised when you see everyone cling to each other.
(2) Schools are made differently, obviously. You have some schools where the student body is very friendly. You have some schools where the student body isn't friendly. And then you have some schools where the student body is combo of friendly and non friendly. </p>

<p>Beyond this, it also depends on your personality. I don't know how you view friends, what you define a friend as, etc. But I would say that schools in general has a group for everyone for the most part.</p>

<p>EDIT: I would also like to add to what Rox said. Don't sit there, acting like a King/Queen, and waiting for people to flock to you. Not only is that not going to happen, you must be very delusional if you think that it will happen. People in college don't give two ****s if you're alone all the time. You have to make a conscious effort on your part to form friendships. (When I say "you" I'm not referring to you, OP. I'm saying it in the general sense lol).</p>

<p>You make as many friends as you are open. But at the college level, you have people from backgrounds and interests that you might have not ha in a HS variety. You'll make tons of friends, but you need to do something as friends to keep them.</p>

<p>People often panic at the thought of going to some OOS school and not knowing anyone. Well.. Thats the point! How can you last a job interview if you can't even make friends?</p>

<p>Will state schools be more cliquey ? because I'm going to an OOS public school :/</p>

<p>But seriously, don't stress about making friends...just be friendly, be outgoing, don't come off as a prick and put yourself out there! sometimes you even make friends in the most unlikely waiting in line :D</p>



<p>very well said!</p>

<p>I just think a lot of the people who start "wahh I don't have any friends" threads on CC (not naming any names) usually just, as Stratus said, sit like a king/queen and wait for all these amazing friends to drop into their lap. There are plenty of opportunities for you to make friends, no matter what school you go to. I refuse to believe the people that say they can't make any friends at their schools because of some quality of the school (a possible exception might be commuters but I don't know) or the type of people that go to the school. If you think there's no one in your school you can befriend (note: not be BFF forever and ever with, but just befriend casually), you aren't open-minded enough to have any friends, or you don't have the social skills. It's like any opportunity in life, you do actually have to put forth some effort and keep an open mind in order to get what you want. Would you want to be friends with someone who just sat there and waited for you to initiate everything or who thought you were below them?</p>

<p>It depends on how outgoing you are...if you are very outgoing it should be easy, if not then it will be harder.</p>

<p>Hey, I'm still in HS but I happened upon this thread and I would like to ask something related. I'm pretty quiet, not very attractive, and not very imposing ( 120lb XC runner lol), but is partying the only real way to make friends of the same or opposite sex? I'm not god-fearing or anything, but I feel like that's an environment where I couldn't succeed. </p>

<p>I consider myself a nerd, and I want to get into med school so I'll be spending lots of time in the library, but I don't want to be forced to hang out with a group of misfits (or worse, spend all my free time in my room--alone). </p>

<p>What are some ways to make long-lasting friends outside of the party scene?</p>

<p>Ahaha, you're going to Wisco I presume? </p>

<p>You'll be'll meet people. But give the party scene a try if you don't mind it, you'll meet people a lot quicker and most people aren't too judgemental. I used to be a lot like that.</p>

<p>Not necessarily. I have not applied yet (although it's near the top of my list) and I'm actually a little turned off by the partying at UW. It's not on any moral grounds, it's just the fact that I'm pretty nerdy and would be the butt of jokes in that environment and with that group of people. And that's assuming they'd even have me in their number.</p>

<p>I'm interested in meeting people with like interests who are going places. I know that sounds cliche but for medical school, I need to get good grades, so I can't really be worried about those sorts of social trivialities.</p>

<p>^^ The surefire way to get my blood pressure and heart rate into dangerous levels would be to force me to go to a party. I sympathize with you though. Engineering is the worst. The halfway decent smart ones who are most like minded are all independent or semi anti myself.</p>

<p>^Ye. I feel you. My Myers-Briggs test says I'm ITNJ, my zodiac sign is Virgo...In other words, everything I consult tells me that I am not cut out for being sociable. </p>

<p>I wouldn't be opposed to partying if it were with the right group of people and semi-controlled. The whole "Asher Roth, Harold and Kumar, American Pie" view of college life doesn't appeal to me.</p>