<p>like - what would you see in a socially awkward person?</p>
<p>is it somewhat unconscious?</p>
<p>i know that i am really socially awkward - but it’s just that my actions are always completely inappropriate for the circumstances - and that my responses to prompts are always thought of as inappropriate.</p>
<p>but it’s not as if people really explicitly point out what’s socially awkward about you.</p>
<p>and i’m looking for behavioral descriptions</p>
<p>there’s an “i’m awkward” facebook group that’s really popular - but those descriptions are examples of social awkwardedness that people generally forgive</p>
<p>==
there’s sometimes the maxim “if you have nothing useful to say, don’t say anything at all”. nonetheless some statements are useful in particular contexts but not useful in other contexts - but it’s often difficult to judge which contexts a statement is useful for - and you won’t get anywhere if you don’t take risks</p>
<p>I know some of these all too well… and it’s really annoying to be around them in public.
Some of the qualities I would say a “socially awkward” person has…</p>
<p>-They’re oblivious to the feelings and reactions of people around them. For example, they keep going on and on about some subject that interests them, even if everyone around them has zero interest in it whatsoever. It might be painfully obvious to me and everyone else that we couldn’t care less, but said person seems to think everyone wants to hear more. Even if we try to change the subject 10 times, s/he’ll still keep bringing up what s/he wants to talk about.</p>
<p>-Inability to adjust behavior based on the occasion. One of my cousins, when he’s around me at home or whatever, acts relaxed; makes inappropriate jokes, talks about video games and comic books, etc. And yet, when we find ourselves at a family friend’s wedding, for example, around adults and people we don’t know so well, he still acts the exact same way. He comes off as being immature and having no class. I kind of feel bad watching it.</p>
<p>I guess a lot of awkwardness arises from not being able to gauge your audience. You know, understanding what you should and shouldn’t say based on who you’re around, or based on how they will act/react to what you say. With a little concentration, I think anyone should be able to understand the basics of this. It’s beyond me why some people can’t seem to grasp it.</p>
<p>Mmm… I guess I fit into this category in certain circumstances. </p>
<p>I don’t know how to quite explain it right. It’s something like this:</p>
<p>I’m a very confident person and thus, ALWAYS, speak very loud and very clear. You know? Like I own the world. But I KNOW I’m not louder than it need be or obnoxious. I’m really not. When I meet new people, I always attempt to find common ground and talk to them and I’m really nice. However…</p>
<p>Almost everytime I’m in a situation that looks something like this: I’m introduced to a group of people along with another girl. When you ask this people who did they like best later, they will say: “Oh the other girl. (Not me). I don’t know… she (me) just has something about her…”</p>
<p>So I don’t know what that “something” is. It doesn’t really bother me, but I’d love to find out. It has happened to me in clubs, sports, work, etc. It’s like when I and another being are introduced to a group of people, that said group will almost always get along much better and quicker with the other person. </p>
<p>Any help?</p>
<p>To answer your question about what I consider socially akward, I don’t know how to put it right (again). lol. For example, I have a friend who’s a complete genius. He is incredibly smart. However, whenever he talks to people, his face expression NEVER changes. He just looks at you and blinks. So he comes off as someone people don’t want to talk because his lack of “feelings.” Which is not true, he is really nice, just people can’t tell. </p>
<p>Besides that, there are people who are very self concious and have a low self esteem. Those people always talk slow and low and make themselves really small in conservations. I guess that’s socially akward.</p>
<p>Have you ever been tested for Aspergers (sp?) syndrome. It’s quite common and one of the foremost symptoms is “social akwardness” (as you say). Not being able to filter your thoughts (ie telling someone you don’t know well, their pants are ugly). Not looking people in the eyes when you speak to them. Laughing when someone hurts themselves, or taking pleasure in someone else’s misfortunes, impulse control of any kind. Also they could be symptoms od ADD…if your social behavior is effecting your life in a negative way, there are things you can do about it. Truth is, you can have perfect SAT’s, and go to a fine Ivy League college, but without basic social skills you’re just about doomed in life. Rarely do they date or marry, they don’t do well in professional suituations like offices and rarely have friends. Google Aspergers, see if you have any of the symptoms. There are ways to “train” yourself, how to behave in social situations. Good Luck!</p>
<p>not being able to read typical social cues is probably a big sign of being socially awkward–like thinking you’re being entertaining when you’re really grossing ppl out</p>