S attended a college 10 hours away (driving time) his freshman year. We drove up to move him in and out and he flew home for holidays/breaks.
He decided to transfer to a school in England his second year. That’s only 6 hours away because we have to fly.
In both cases it has worked out fine. I must admit that he has traveled and flown a lot so that was not an issue.
Oh yeah and H and I are flying to London tomorrow to visit him 
These days, with cell phones, Skype and FaceTime, being far away from home is a lot different from what it used to be. Mine did undergrad within 60-90 miles from home. Medical issues played a role, but so did the excellence of the choices in our nearby city. The one in grad school is now 3,000 miles away and it is a positive thing for her and me (I am learning to be on my own too!). Every kid is different and timing is different for each one. I agree with blue skies that the same kinds of development can happen close to home. Technology tends to bring the different geographic experiences closer.
@blueskies2day I understand your point! My daughter’s top choice is only a 2-hour drive but yes, she will be plenty independent there too. I guess I meant navigating airports and other transportation. Hey, I went to (and lived at) a state school an hour away by train, but I was very independent even though I went home some weekends. Always did my own laundry though 
D is 8 hours away. College is 45 min from airport. Airport offers nonstop flights to our town. We drove her up for move in; she’s flying for most of the holidays. Might car-pool with new-found friend from sort-of nearby. We got a credit card that gave us 50K points for opening it; using those points for tix. turning out great so far!
My kids have been flying solo (or together without an adult) since they were 13 and14. Before they did, on a flight with me, I made my older child ‘do it all’ in the airport. We arrived and I said “Where to?” She had to look at the monitors, figure out how to check bags, go through security, find the gate. Her first flights were all non-stop from our airport (small) to Denver, where her uncle or grandparents would get her. Sometimes her sister was with her. Over the years, we added new challenges like connecting flights, different airports, carryon luggage. One thing I drummed into them was if they didn’t know something, ASK! Don’t just wander around. We also allowed a lot of time.
Cell phones also help. One flight had a gate change and no one at that airport seemed to know. It was online and I was correct and got the info to her. One time her connecting flight was delayed several hours and I was able to get her on another flight before the one she was on was even on the ground after the first flight.
@blueskies2day, both of my kids met a lot of students from the part of the country they went to college in. They would have been with a lot more students more similar to themselves in background and thinking if they had stuck closer to home. They were also out of their comfort zone – couldn’t come home easily, had to learn to travel on their own, had to figure out summer storage of belongings. Both also took advantage of opportunities off campus in their new location to explore new cities and new regions of the country. Going far away isn’t for every kid, but I believe it was good for my kids, and expanded their worldview more than a local school would have. Both had fairly local options in case they got cold feet, but they were excited to spread their wings and try something new.
@twoinanddone I try to do that too, the last time we flew I said, “Ok, Magellan, lead the way.” That’s how I’m helping her learn to navigate the NYC subway too!
@blueskies2day My D specifically chose an environment that is very different from the one where she grew up. She’s in the south instead of the NW, in a town known for country and western instead of grunge, an area where faith is strong instead of one of the allegedly “most unchurched” city, and most of all, a place where the black population is much larger than here in Seattle. For the first time, she’s not a minority almost everywhere she goes. She is having a very, very different experience than she would if she had stayed here and gone to a local college, or even one in a surrounding state. And she loves it, and is thriving.
Have your child do the accepted student trips on her own at those schools if they remain in the running. It will give her a better sense of what will be involved in traveling to and from school. She may conclude that it feels too far. Or not.
With that said, going to a different part of the country for school is a great way to experience something new with relatively little risk. (It also can make you a more attractive applicant. )
Our youngest is a 2+ day drive away and it has all worked out well. We let her take our old car freshman year since the distance was so great but she flies home for winter break. She uses a shuttle to get to the airport (2 hours away).
She loves being in a different part of the country and we love visiting her there. One of us will fly out and then drive home with her for summer and even though the drive us long, it feels like a mini vacation.
Finances are a big part of the process. If you can afford to shell out a few hundred here and there for flights, summer storage, it can be great. One D went to school a short bus ride from Seatac in in Seattle, and it made flights home so easy compared to some of the rural schools she considered. Personally, I think that the need to go to a different part of the country is overrated, if you are a traveling family regardless. We visit family and travel all over the country and world, and comparing my two Ds, one in college an hour away, and the other, thousands of miles, it was a bit of a PITA. The school was great, and we both loved the NW. However, I’d rather put the travel money towards study abroad, encourage jobs in other parts of the country in summers, as well as internships and summer intensives. And then there is always grad school, which has opened up other parts of the country for two of mine. The other came home for grad school, making it a very precious year for me!
OP, I will suggest that your D tries flying to her intended school SOLO before she decides that’s the one. (Accepted Students Weekend is a good chance to do this.) She’s the one that will need to negotiate trouble with connections and cancellations, so she should learn if that’s a dealbreaker for her. Some kids get all excited about getting into a school far away and then realize they do NOT want to deal with the logistics of travel, realize that family finances don’t permit coming home during a mid-semester break, missing Thanksgiving is a non-starter, the two plane connections and a shuttle van to campus are a bit much, etc.
My kids were ten hour and seven hour drives away from home, but less than two hours non-stop by plane. Southwest (with free bags) was our friend! Distance was not a factor for either of them. We traveled a lot as a family (mainly camping, but also to CA to visit family friends) and both kids were comfortable using public transit in our metropolitan area, so flying solo was not a big leap from that point.
We live on one coast and all 3 attend(ed) school on the other. It’s what they chose and I told them that how difficult it is to get home 3-4ish times a year should not be high on the list of concerns. They all came home for Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks each year and some summers. I’d say if a 17 or 18 year old isn’t familiar with navigating airports on their own yet, there’s nothing wrong with learning now (they’re not too young!).
One of my D’s went to a school that required a 3 hour bus ride after the cross country flight. Took her 15 hours door to door but the fit was perfect for her. Sure, a few times a year she had a really long day but it was worth it for her.
Also, with one of mine, we bought a slew of things she needed on Amazon and had it shipped to the hotel we were staying at for move in freshman year. We cleared it with the hotel first and it was waiting for us upon arrival. Free shipping and it worked great.
For us, the fit is most important. To me, the only downside is that you increase the chance your kid will elect to stay in that vicinity after graduation.
I agree with great lakes mom, that finances are a big part of the process. QMP went a little less than 1000 miles away. Getting there meant a 2-day drive–for us, that is; if you are a hardy type who could do that in one day, please don’t bother to tell me that! Also, some of the classmates’ parents arrived by private plane, but I won’t go into that . . .
At breaks, QMP flew alone, no problems. However, we drove at the beginning of each year and at the end of each year. The college had very limited storage available for the students.
There were probably local storage companies, but packing up at the end of the year was a challenge, because the dorm access ended–really ended–less than 24 hours after the end of final exams. One year, the due date of the sole major paper for a course fell three or four days after dorm access ended. (Seniors could still be in the dorms, but underclassmen could not.) There might have been local storage companies (or a moving company) that would also box up a student’s “stuff,” if one could afford it.
The college was a great fit, and overall the experience was very workable. But going back to the opening point, finances make a difference, and there were things we could not really afford to do. We were “full pay,” but that was quite a stretch for us, in practice. Savings + current income did not cover the full bill. Coupled with the distance, this meant that we never traveled to see QMP in various college productions. I regret that more now than I did at the time. Also, had QMP been closer geographically, we could have provided much better care when QMP got mononucleosis, but stayed at college.
Don’t have kids here, but I ended up going away to college in AZ from CA. It worked out well for both myself and my parents. They enjoyed vacationing in the town I attended college in. I would end up driving to and from home every summer and Christmas.
Shipping stuff is easy, as is flying solo. You get used to it very quickly. No sweat.
Our kids both attended college 2500 miles (a5-6 hour plane ride) away. It was fine. They came home as desired for Christmas and some time in the summer. We visited when we could.
I attend college 500 miles (9-hour drive) away from home. Had to take the Amtrak train then a bus for freshman move-in day last year, which actually was the first time I saw my campus. I traveled alone for a total of 13 hours that day. Didn’t go home until I flew home for Christmas break, where I had to take a connecting flight (no direct flights from Newark to Wilmington, unfortunately). Took a train both ways for spring break, and we were stuck in Virginia for an hour on the way back. That was the last time I’ve taken the Amtrak, and I’ve flown each time since. Got to go home for fall break a couple of weeks back, and Hurricane Matthew getting two days of classes canceled made it a little longer than we originally bargained for, although being forced to evacuate campus was no fun.
All pros and cons considered, it’s been the best decision of my life. I’ve grown in unimaginable ways and am wholly more proud of myself than I was two years ago. now, I just want my family to come down to see it themselves - they still have yet to be able to do so.
D2 went to school on the East Coast and we live on the West Coast. She really loved travelling at the start of her freshman year but she did grow weary of the travel and distance from home. She enjoyed her college experience for the most part but does prefer to be closer to family. She is doing grad school in California. It’s still 2.5 to 3 hours by plane and 8 hour car drive but so much closer.
DS went to school 2000 miles from home (but conveniently a direct flight). Since we have family near there and were not short on travel funds, it worked out ok.
However there is a post-college downside, which we parents knew was a risk going into it - he opted to settle there after graduation. But as I tell my friends, if a kid is Healthy, Happy and Self-supporting, that’s the main thing. Other stuff, like living us, would be gravy. Of course I’m a big gravy fan and would love it if he eventually comes back.
We live in California & D goes to school in Philadelphia. It has worked out amazingly well.
For first move-in, she and I flew there with just her clothes & scheduled one day of BB&B, Target, etc. to buy everything on her list & then moved her in the next day. She puts her stuff in storage each summer with a company that will pick it up & drop it off. She is saving so much money by attending this school that we have no reservations about flying her home at Thanksgiving, Christmas & Spring break.
In terms of what do they gain (post #18) - she is experiencing a huge east coast city, has learned about subways & regional rail & is an expert flyer now. She has seen new customs, new foods, new architecture, vastly different weather and plant life. She has encountered sub-cultures we don’t see much of here (orthodox Jewish, Amish). She has enjoyed the curiosity of others about her upbringing, and learning about the stereotypes they have of us. She has made a few trips to NYC, gone “down the shore” & learned about beach tags, and learned the wonder of the Wawa and how to pronounce Bala Cynwyd. In short, she seems far more worldly than she did two years ago.