Better to have been the ones who bit their tongue rather than ask for money for something that was probably a want more than a need. Your children will benefit from the example you set 
My parents have always tried to equalize gifts and other assistance to the extent they could. I think they were/are great parents and all of us (siblings) have followed the same parenting model.
On the major stuff, I try to be close to equal with my giving to my two oldest kids.
We helped the first kid with buying a house. My second kid isnât ready but my wife and I told both kids we will do the same with the second kid when the time comes. If this never happens, the estate can be adjusted.
We also told my first kid we are helping because it is expensive to buy a place here and we want you to live near us.
My second kid lives thousands of miles away. SoâŠI guess we canât expect my first kid to be stuck here while my second kid lives so far away. So I guess what we told our first kid, we are helping you buy a place because we want you near us, is bs. 
In practice, how does this happen? Do you pay into roth yourself or do you give the money to your son to put it in the roth?
Having an only, we donât have to facet treating them equal issue. Growing up as a third born, I would have appreciated more equal treatment, not even steven but some acknowledgement that a third born could use from time to time something better than hand me downs.
My kids have had Roths since they were about 12 years old. Under 18 we were Co owners and I set it up for automatic withdrawal out of a joint banking account we have. We still have the same joint account, but Iâm no longer named on the roth. However theyâre still in college and show me how their funds are doing once or twice a year. Iâmean not sure when weâll stop, probably when they have jobs with retirement plans.
There was a big thread a while ago on the issue of whether kids should be treated equally in the money gifting arena regardless of individual circumstances, or if consideration should be made for life choices and situations, i.e. one kid becomes a ceo and one is a social worker - how do you handle it? There was no consensus IIRC.
I used to get random checks in the mail from my father, whenever he gave my older brother money (it took him quite a bit longer to get through college and start his career) he would send the same amount to the rest of us to keep it even. I never cared one way or the other, but I didnât mind the money either. 
@iglooo, I guess what weâre doing is somewhere between funding it directly and giving him the money to do it. He has a UTMA account that weâve funded in the past. Weâll move $4500 from there to the Roth. I guess I sort of lied when I said we would provide the $4500; we provided it in the past.
Are there tax implications (on gains/losses) in moving funds from an UGMA to a Roth? BOth my kids have UTMAs for nominal amounts that we never used for college. This might be a good way to move these funds on.
We want to be help our kids have fulfilling adult lives. Iâve established Roths for both and for while hired each to work at my company. ShawD is now working as an RN at an adult salary while getting her masters to be an NP (she graduates this May) and I have tried to get her to put 10% of her salary in savings. She is contributing to the retirement plan at her employer because they match.
On equality, I think we help in the ways that help them the best â equality in general but not in specific $ amounts. As an NP, ShawDâs salary will be decent but not huge, though she will turn 23 at about the time she passes her licensure exam, so she will have a long runway to save. We set up a dynasty trust for estate planning and asset protection services. ShawSon has started one venture as a senior (in which the trust invested a little bit) and that company is operating but is not yet profitable. It might be worth something (even a fair bit) at the end of the day (or not), He could command very high salaries (much higher than ShawD could make at her peak NP salary) as soon as he finishes grad school. But, he is likely to start other ventures (he is working on two right now while in school) and is likely to create significant wealth over the course of his life. So, we will probably help ShawD with a downpayment on a house (her proposal is that we help her buy a 2 family house that we live in downstairs and she live upstairs with her family to be) in the same way we helped ShawSon with an investment. So, we may not help him with his down payment and he may or may not need the help â though the one of the mandates of the trust is to help with housing. He plans to offer the trust an opportunity to invest in each of his ventures. If and when one hits, this would also redound to the benefit of ShawD and us.
"Are there tax implications (on gains/losses) in moving funds from an UGMA to a Roth? "
Yes, you have to sell whatever is in the UGMA, and this will create a gain our loss for the child, who is the actual owner of the assets.
Depending on the amount of gain, they may owe tax, and some may be taxed at the parentsâ rate if they have over a certain amount of investment income ($1100? I forget the exact amount.)
OK, so if you work beyond age 65- do you still go on medicare at 65?
We have already loaned/gifted S nearly as much as his total college merit award was. He has put the max toward his solo 401k and the rest toward inventory for his thriving business. We are very pleased. He is using the funds more productively than we would and it has lots of time to grow.
When D is able to medically able to work, we will likely offer a similar amount. We are already paying all her expenses, but donât feel those should be counted against any future gift to her, until the docs agree she is healthy enough to work.
@rockymtnhigh, here is some information: âOtherwise-eligible older employees are not required to enroll in Medicare Part A while they are covered under an employer group health plan (GHP). See 42 C.F.R. § 406.24(a)(3) (defining group health plan). Rather, they may enroll during a special enrollment period that ends eight months after their GHP coverage terminates. See 42 C.F.R. § 406.21(a) ; 42 C.F.R. § 406.24(b)(2) . The special enrollment period is provided to enable such individuals to enroll in Medicare without having to wait for the general enrollment period. 42 C.F.R. § 406.24(a)(4) . Enrollment during a month in which an individual is covered under a GHP or in the first full month in which the individual is no longer covered will result in coverage effective with the first day of the month of enrollment or, at the individualâs option, on the first day of any of the three following months. 42 C.F.R. § 406.24(e)(1) . Enrollment during any other month of the special enrollment period will result in coverage effective on the first day of the month following the month of enrollment. 42 C.F.R. § 406.24(e)(2) .â
Yes, you go on Medicare and select your supplement and drug plan. You do not have to start receiving SS, especially if you are still working. You can make that decision to start collecting SS at 66, 67. Thru to 70.
Although I do not plan to start collecting SS at 62, I also do not think I will start collecting SS at or after 66.
I do not feel like using up too much of my retirement nest egg before I will start collecting SS. Like one of my coworkers told me: How much you could collect SS could be changed by the politicians in the future any time. I think SS will be there when I retire, but the exact amount I could receive is less predictable than what I have saved by myself. I think:
after-tax savings like Roth > tax-deferred traditional IRA/401K > SS > Pension (especially companyâs rather than governmentâs pensions.)
The best is of course that I could work till 70.
âBetter to have been the ones who bit their tongue rather than ask for money for something that was probably a want more than a need. Your children will benefit from the example you setâ
I agree with that, and I am really glad that we have never asked either of our parents for money, even when we needed it badly. However, I donât know if our children will benefit from that, they were babies/toddlers, and donât remember any of it. Though if itâs appropriate and doesnât seem like a lecture, I do try to tell them stories of how destitute and desperate we were, no job in sight, their dad with a college degree as a laid off airline pilot , working as a valet and parking cars for $7/hr. I tell them stories about their great Grandpa almost starving to death (saved by Russian communists), their Grandpa struggling terribly, and how I grew up in a house with no heat and poverty conditionsâŠI just want them to know that even though as far as they can remember, life has been easy, but it has been far tougher down the family tree.
Would the gains be taxed at our rate if heâs 23? Weâve never converted it over to just his name, though it became officially his at 18.
^For the 2015 tax year, Form 8615 (âkiddie taxâ) can apply to kids who are over 18 and under 24 as of 12/31/15 and who are full time students who do not provide over half of their own support with earned income.
Does under 24 include 24? If not, why not wait a few weeks? He will be 24 next year.
This might be a dumb question, but l will ask it: does âhalf of their own supportâ include tuition? Room and board paid to a college?