I skimmed the article, but I think the goal was just to show how more states are more or less expensive than others/compare to each other. (But most people could probably figure out that HI and NY are more expensive than MS!)
I didnât read Annieâs answer, but my answer is âzeroâ.
I genuinely donât understand why someone would feel that they owe adult children and grandkids financial support.
Maybe because I was raised to be independent, responsible, and self sufficient. I mean, arenât we supposed to be as adults?
Sure, I would like to be able to contribute financially on occasion to my adults kids, but I feel no obligation to do so. I gave them a good start - a college education, life skills, financial wisdom, etc. They have always been proud of their jobs and making money since they were little and I expect that will continue as they continue to grow up. They will be more than capable of supporting themselves and should be! And isnât that a main goal of parenting - raising kids to be adults?
Any money I give them will only be if I can afford it and because I want to.
We didnât get help from either set of parents for our house or cars either - and it never even occurred to me for them, or anyone, to contribute. (Maybe because I was one of 5!)
Like gpo, we earned and saved for what we have. And honestly, we are better off financially and for retirement than many of our friends who make 2 to 3 times more than we do (we say we donât have money which is why we are good with it ).
That seems like an upper / upper-middle class question to ask.
For many, perhaps most, families, the aging parents would be glad if they manage to avoid being a burden (financial or otherwise) on their adult kids or other relatives.
We had help on our first down payment from my MIL. It was really generous, more so than I realized until she died a few years later and we saw had view of her finances. It gave us a jump start on home owning, something I appreciate very much now.
Isnât the reverse true in some cultures? That the adult kids owe their parents financial support?
It often ends up that way when the parents do not have much money and are not able to keep working.
I love Annieâs response:
Please, step away from the checkbook. Your adult children donât need another cent. What they do need, sorely, is some sense. To continue giving them cash is to rob them of valuable experience and life lessons.
Couldnât have said it better.
It is great if parents are able to help out to give their kids a bit of head start with down payments for car/house, but I donât think parents shouldnât deprive themselves of their own enjoyment in order to help their kids out. I see too many parents continue to subsidize their adult children, especially the one thatâs not doing too well. Sometimes I see it as a bottomless pit.
I have worked hard my whole life and I have probably have 10 more good years in me to travel and enjoy life. My kids have been blessed to have the best education possible with no debt and a very good childhood. They are on their own to make what they want out of it.
Or their own retirement security.
Someone commented somewhere (I forget where) that if you donât fly first class your kids will!
There are pockets in many geographically larger states that do not have access to certain routine as well as emergency and surgical services, no matter what the state tax base is.
Also heavy traffic (especially peak travel times) may limit getting to the services one needs â I have a personal example. A non-medical but skilled/calm grandmother/friend of mine delivered her 2nd grandchild in Atlanta area home master bathroom because labor pains came on quickly and neither car nor ambulance would get her DD to hospital in time. Ambulance transported healthy mother and baby to hospital after delivery.
I do want to comment that I live in Alabama, and for many on East and West coast (and some even in the Midwest or Southwest) may think that weak health care system and weak public services is true for a state like AL - may think âdirt roads, shot gun housesâ. âThe bottom, next to MississippiâŠâ So totally not true for the populated areas that have industry, and for most of the state. For a âlow populationâ state, we have two excellent medical schools, and lots of specialty physician training in Birmingham as well (2nd med school is in Mobile, University of South Alabama). UAB Med School is highly rated, and the Hospital and Medical Center in Birmingham includes a sizable Childrenâs Hospital; lots of medical research there as well. Two pharmacy schools in the state (one public, one private). A veterinarian school at AU (I believe only 28 states have veterinarian schools). Lots of nursing programs. A news story recently stated AL exports a lot of medical providers.
We also do not suffer from weaker public services IMHO. My home town in WI (county seat) had a volunteer fire department for example - and still does. Certainly in some fringe/low population areas, as is with other states, you depend on volunteer fire departments.
We have higher local taxes that provide a decent tax base, as well as âenoughâ in property taxes â as within other states, some areas have higher property taxes than others, as there is diversity with some counties with little industry and some highly productive pockets of cities that âcarry the rest of the stateâ so to speak. Alabama is gaining industry/growing - business friendly.
Generally, where would IL be w/o Chicago? How well a state and local municipality runs the area, no matter how much revenue they take in. Where the spending goesâŠGrowing up in WI, our state parks were heavily used by IL residents. WI is a great place to recreate in summer months.
Huntsville AL (in N AL, 100 miles north of Birmingham and 100 miles south of Nashville) has been rated high on âbest cityâ not too long ago by USA Today, was number one and I believe it moved to number two more recently.
When one researches moving somewhere that does not include family ties on where they go, one cannot look at blanket assumptions. I am sure there are some affordable places in states where there is general exodus (CA for example - many moving to TX or other places).
In addition to people moving here for jobs, many grandparents move to the area as well. I hear from some grandparents âwe have grandchildren elsewhere, but we can afford to live well here.â
I know we have a good natural water supply, in part thanks to the court fight where GA wanted to divert water (especially for Atlanta) via Corps of Engineers changing existing natural water ways.
One does need to not only research, but get to know people in the community where one wants to live â to learn more, be able to ask the right questions. Things one may take for granted.
We have lived in 3 diverse states, WI, TX, AL. DDs live in FL and TX. At some point, IMHO, we might move to be closer to grandchildren or have a small condo near the grandchildren, fly between, and keep one car at each location. I suspect when DH totally is âdoneâ with his primary hobby and volunteer work which is tied to our current location. I foresee a lot of effort with any change in our residence.
Not completely sure what all that has to do with anything. Its not a contest. Each has to choose where they feel is the best place to retire. Atlanta has traffic, but many hospitals to choose from. And birthinâ babies and the availability of Childrenâs hospitals (though Atlanta will be seeing the opening of its third childrenâs hospital, the Arthur M Blank Hospital, as part of CHOA, in the fall of this year) is not too relevant to this discussion, as not too many retirees are going to need maternity or childrenâs resources for themselves.
And as for the 30 + year battle over water from Lake Lanier and the Chattahoochee river (both in GA, but Lake Lanier is not a natural waterway, it was created by the Corps of engineers) and some shared river basins, if the Corps of Engineers doesnât sign off on the Dec agreement, Ala will sue Ga again. For like the 4th time. Because they kept losing. (FL, Ga and AL have been arguing over this for years).
"The agreement appears likely to settle another of the long-running water disputes between the two states (GA and AL), which have battled in court over various issues since 1990.
Kempâs office said the plan must still go through an environmental review and a public comment period.
It also still needs a stamp of approval from the Army Corps. If the Corps adopts the plan after a one-year review period, Alabama has agreed to dismiss the case. If the agency rejects the proposal, Alabamaâs lawsuit would resume."
Maybe AL should also explore other/additional resources?? Desert countries have.
JMO.
Now back to retirement issues.
On the issue of taxes and healthcare, Iâm no expert and was just suggesting a tendency. The data are probably pretty clear at the gross level, but things will be a little more complex at a local level.
https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/rankings/health-care
No-tax state Wyoming is 42nd, which surprises me as they have mining revenues to spend on things like universities and I would have guessed health care. Texas is 32nd. Florida is 27th. Nevada is 31st. Tennessee is 34th (and I know that they have some strong medical centers in parts of the sate). Obviously, this single correlation is simplistic, but it is indicative. I have no axe to grind about Alabama, but according to USNWR, it is ranked 44th in the country for quality of health care. Now, it is no doubt true that pockets of the state like Huntsville (with military facilities and a university) and Birmingham (with an academic medical center) have better health care than the rest of the state. By implication, the quality of health care in the state other than in those well-provisioned pockets must be awful. An affluent retiree probably does not have to deal with that if they choose to live in a nice part of the state. Similarly, Iâm sure there is really good health care in Miami and Palm Beach. But probably not so much in the middle of the state or the Panhandle.
I live in a midwestern state that has excellent healthcare ⊠in some areas. But there are areas without access to good healthcare, and itâs getting worse as our hospital systems merge & close rural hospitals (you know, to improve care ⊠right?). The corporate story is that people will be able to access great healthcare with these merged systems ⊠but unless you are able to schedule what you need in advance, travel to get the care, and afford to stay in that area if itâs not within driving distance, it doesnât actually benefit you. So even if you live in a state with excellent healthcare, you might not actually be able to access it when you need it.
The rural medical challenge is real. Iâve been encouraged tor read efforts to use telemedicine (sometimes in conjunction with a local NP) to reach more remote patients. Some Denver surgeons do occasional trips to hospitals in western CO. Is it enough to make me consider retiring there? No. But for some less worrisome retirees it might make the medical care compromise less daunting.
I wasnât picking on Atl or GA, but pointing out various things. Agree âEach has to choose where they feel is the best place to retire.â
Obviously you are acutely aware of water needs/resources, and keep up with the Atl and GA news about it - but GA doesnât seem at this time to need to go into various laws like highly populated areas in states like Arizona or Nevada - low water natural outdoor plants/no grass, etc. I believe Nevada also has legislation in place about âall electric cars/vehiclesâ by a certain date. I am not going to âargueâ with you on the topography and what GA wants to do - and back at ya about exploring other resources or using less water in metro area hurting on available water. While I continue to live in AL, I will keep informed, but not front burner for me on this issue as the area I live in is not impacted by the things you detail.
Older people/retirees do need ambulance and emergency services - with some recovery depending on quickly receiving emergency services/medical care/surgery, so being in very densely populated/traffic areas as well as âmedical desert spotsâ is something to consider. Nice to have a good Childrenâs Hospital if something happens with visiting grandkids.
A close friend of mine who was traveling in south AL (locals call it LA, Lower AL) with her DH driving, was having a stroke - he got her to nearest emergency room - and she got the injection of the stroke medication, and they got her transported by ambulance to a larger facility. Friend made a remarkable recovery â MDs thought she would have longer effects of the stroke based on her condition at the arrival at the larger hospital (droopy side of the face, arm and leg weakness on that side). They called her recovery âmiraculousâ.
Retirement issue - most on this thread I am sure have âconcernsâ about inflation, but not as concerned as the people that have not planned or saved enough for retirement. â66% of seniors answered âyesâ they are worried inflation will impact their retirementâ. We have seen/discussed the low level some people have saved for retirement.
If someone is doing a big relocation in retirement, lots of things to think about. I know several people who have a retirement home selected where they also will continue to do a lot with an RV or a 5th wheel/tow with big truck. One (cousin and his wife) is living near one DD/SIL (no Gkids, but this DD is their âbest chanceâ at Gkids) in a 55+ community - so they can enjoy activities there while also continuing to RV, and keeping everything âaffordableâ for them. Our DD/SIL lives in the same city as they now do, and we had them over for dinner during the Holidays. Another friend has built a place on land convenient for Gkids/families to gather as well as do a lot of outdoor stuff; they also just got a 5th wheel RV - he has a few years until retirement. In a way, that couple is going forward, even with his chronic hereditary kidney disorder (his older brother died of it, even after a kidney donated by his SIL/my friend). His kidney disorder is somewhat âstabilizedâ with experimental drugs.
With all due respect, if I was having a stroke and needed TPA or an acute transport to another facility, Iâd rather be in metro Atlanta than lower Alabama. There are plenty of air ambulances here too.
All these anecdotal stories seem off topic to the global topic.
100% agree with you.
There is a paradigm shift on how to access care. For example, our PCP use to reserve some spots in his schedule for âwork in appointmentsâ - people sick that need care. Now there are these Urgent Care centers, and PCP for past few years (our MD for years changed to teaching role/retired from patient care) now relies on appointments and hospital care patients, while also interested in what goes on (keeping him updated with reports from Urgent Care or other medical providers). The better informed/the better one understands and can communicate their health care needs - and also know what are good medical decisions for their care. PCP office also has some use of Tele-med, but typically it has been on the phone (talking only) and we agreed to the Tele-med charges (needed prescription for UTI).
Our hospital âsystemâ keeps acquiring smaller hospitals in our area and has other medical providers under its umbrella (certain physician groups, Urgent Care centers, now has just acquired area ambulance service). There is a smaller hospital that one can go to if they do not like the large hospital system. There is one area south of us about 40 miles that now has a stand alone 24 hour emergency center to fulfill a need, as it is populous enough to support this kind of a service - and about another 30 miles or so to a full service hospital.
I donât recall the various levels of trauma care ER, but sometimes that is needed - I know we have it at our large hospital. Med-flight available as well.
Our specialist physicians have multiple offices within a 50 mile range east and west of us, and these physician groups rotate their MDs to these various offices. I worked for one of these groups in the 1990âs, and the MDs didnât mind the driving.
There is a range of NPs - some are better than others. Again, knowledge is power on this. DH had a specialty physician retire, and their office wanted to âplug him inâ with another MD in their group (one that we have no familiarity with) â no, we wanted another MD in their group (and we got him) â one that I was familiar with/have seen, and who also treats my neighbor. The MD we wanted was still accepting new patients, so they could not refuse us.
While tangential to the topic here, quick access to healthcare as we age is an important variable. Several friends who had mountain âcabinsâ (really more like a second home) where they had planned to spend more time, realized that the gravel mountain roads were at times difficult to navigate, especially during the cold months, and the ability to get into town for basic supplies was sometimes more treacherous than they had planned for. Each one that I knew who had one of these mountain/retirement homes has sold them.