How Much Do You think You Need to Retire? What Age Will You/Spouse Retire? Investment and General Retirement Issues (Part 3)

Parent Cafe
2081

In my opinion, there is no controlling increasing housing cost regardless of the type of home you live in. Rents can go up each time you sign a new lease. For condos- HOA fees, property tax, and the dreaded assessment (which we see a lot of where we live when something big needs to be done in the condo community) can all increase. For private home ownership, there are unexpected repairs, along with increasing property taxes. All of the above cost increases are out of your control.

We decided that wherever we moved to at this time (we are around 65), since we have already downsized, it would be easy to move again if we felt we needed to. The hard work is behind us, we have gotten rid of all the stuff already. Who knows what the future holds. You need to make your housing decision for today (and the foreseeable future). BTW my building is a brand new 55+ apartment building, so the odds of getting kicked out are low. Most of the tenants are moving in after downsizing at a much older age then us (in their 70s and 80s).

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2082

Well, just like the new active-adult communities are no longer the white-haired, shuffleboard retirement communities of old, we aging boomers have prompted developers to create rental home communities that do away with all the objections listed by posters above. We have several of these single-level independent rental home communities near us. Some are build-to-rent, some are straight rental, but all look and feel very similar to the active-adult community we currently live in. There are reasons to rent and reasons to own, but the options in each category are now fairly indistinguishable.

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2083

Why Fewer Americans Are Moving for Jobs and Homes - WSJ

This article ā€˜spurred onā€™ the flurry of activity after a dormant time with this thread.

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2084

Sorry for your loss. In one way, to guarantee your neighborhood is to have ownership. Selling and buying can be OK if it is long-term; selling to then rent can mean a lot of transitioning and raising rents. If you are still working, you may decide to move away once you retire, so better to keep current home until you decide where you want to live in retirement.

Change was thrust upon you with becoming a widow.

Any future changes are in your control, but a lot of thought on current and future has to be weighed out.

Glad you are ā€˜seeing how it goesā€™. You also can track homes in your area (what they are selling for) to keep things in mind.

Our move will be our decision, but we hope to time things out well to get the most for our home - since it is custom built and well maintained, with a property in the location that means higher value - it is for us to do things right with right timing.

2085

My husband and I have been having this same discussion repeatedly over the years as we notice our neighbors getting younger and younger (really, just us getting older and older). But I canā€™t live anywhere less expensive with the privacy I have on an acre lot in a beautiful tree lined neighborhood on a river. Itā€™s lovely here. We pay hardly any property taxes on a very large home (over 65 no school or school bond taxes) and our local government has some of the best parks/rec centers in the state with the lowest tax base. And we are only 4 miles in a straight drive to a very good full service hospital and medical center. Sorry to the young family who want my house but I have no place to go right now that suits us and I do not feel guilty staying put. We are one of those who did not pay off our mortgage but refinanced at 2.6% in 2021. I would pay more for a 2 bedroom apartment than my monthly mortgage payment. Updating and remodeling as we age will be fun now that we are comfortable with our retirement. As long as we can go up and down the staircases, which will be good exercise for us, we should be good for a while.

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2086

@SOSConcern -I have been retired since 2021. We moved here in 2022. This is the community I want to stay in.

Iā€™m aware of rents rising, but D and SIL live in a nearby suburb and their taxes and home owners insurance just took a big leap. So costs can rise no matter what.

I really do not want to be maintaining a home and yard. Not my thing.

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2087

If we didnā€™t have 5 grandkids with two working parents in another state, we definitely would continue to live in our current home. We want to be part of their lives for many years.

We pulled out money with a paid for home, and put it in investments - we formerly had a 10-year mortgage at 2.5% interest and then refinanced also with a 10-year mortgage at 2.5% the day before interest rates were going up (in a way I wish I had pulled more money out, but enjoy paying only $1400/month for mortgage). I had trouble getting through to this CU mortgage department on the phone, and then got through at the headquarter office with the CU mortgage manager - he let us lock into the quoted rate and knew the rates were going up the next day (and told me so). The first 10-year mortgage was with one of our credit unions (this one was with Hā€™s former employer Motorola, that always was OOS for us, but membership had access to their CU mortgages - well that CU merged with another and they didnā€™t carry mortgages in our state when we were getting to the end of the 10 year mortgage). Another former employer credit union doesnā€™t write their own mortgages (thus higher bank interest rates). We have membership in two local CUs - one had these great rates and still underwrites their own mortgages, while the other had higher rates.

Agree about your property being in demand - but you have the right to appreciate the over 65 and no school or school bond taxes - you ā€˜paid your duesā€™. Glad you are able to keep up your home and your property. Even with stairs - that would not get me to move. We have 9 stairs and then a landing/turn, 4 stairs, landing/turn, 3 stairs. If a chair lift was needed for the 9 stairs. But we have a downstairs bedroom/bath. We would not move locally if this home no longer was feasible for us.

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2088

You can hire the yard help. You certainly can pull together a list of home maintenance help.

But it is what you want to do. Being in your home for 3 years - you know what you have.

I would definitely go beyond a year to decide. Depending on seasons you experience. You probably are still getting to know your area well, even with D and SIL living in a nearby suburb. IDK how big a move you had from when you lived before retiring in 2021.

The realtor you used to purchase your home could be a resource for finding home maintenance help.

It sounds like the move was great for you as a couple. It will take a lot of time to sort out your grief and also start feeling joy as a single person.

2089

We have 2 sets of stairs with a landing and turn in the middle, so if I fall, likely not a killer - hopefully not a broken him either! But, very dooable and handrails on both sides half way up with a wall on the other half. We also have a full bath and bedroom downstairs, just not the master. If that is one thing I would tell 30-40 year olds just assuming they will move sometime before retirement, go ahead and either get master on main or have at least a guest bedroom and full bath downstairs because those kids growing up makes life go fast and boom - theyā€™re gone and your old and ā€œgee, why didnā€™t i think of that when we bought this house!ā€

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2090

I think I would have a hard time living in an apartment building, quite honestly. Our previous home was very private and where we are now there is quite a bit more neighborhood activity that Iā€™m not always a fan of. I donā€™t have any grandchildren and D has her own life to live. I live in a university town and if I was sending my children to school here, I would worry about where they would live after their first year. Developers want to build close to the U, but permanent residents donā€™t want these giant complexes in their neighborhoods. There is a lot of substandard housing and not a lot of places for young professionals (i.e. non-students) to live. We do have a few 55+ rental communities, but the locations are undesireable (want to live right next to the busy train tracks? Have I got a deal for you!).
H and I have acknowledged that if something happens to one of us, the other will likely want to move. H has siblings and D - I have D. I wouldnā€™t want to live here alone.

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2091

When we moved into our house (built new), the kids were 1 and 4. The downstairs den/guestroom with pocket door into the bathroom/shower was intended for the visiting grandparents. Who knew that 30 years later weā€™d be eyeing for ourselves, in case of surgery etc down the road? We really should have made that shower bigger - there was space.

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2092

Can you still do it?

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2093

Thatā€™s why we expanded the downstairs powder room into a full bath when building, for my mother since she could not go up/down stairs. She was thrilled to be able to stay with us when she visitedā€¦now, we may get use out of it as well if we are ever uanble to navigate the stairs for whatever reason.

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2094

I understand and think you are making good choices, waiting a year or so to decide.

Iā€™m so over homeownership. I would rather clean public bathrooms every day for the rest of my life than do yard work. Iā€™m tired of having a big house to vacuum up and de-cat hair. Iā€™m tired of something, everything, seemingly breaking at once. Iā€™m always the one taking off work waiting for hours for whatever repairperson has to come - and hopefully does come when they say. I donā€™t care anymore what color my walls are. I donā€™t care if the walls are bare. I want simple.

Re: neighborsā€¦ Weā€™ve have far more problems with neighbors in our house than my kids have renting - thatā€™s not even counting the years the next door house was a football team club house (with as many as 26 kids staying there, likely selling drugs) and the frat kids. Iā€™ve never heard a single noise from a neighbor upstairs/downstairs/side while being at my kidsā€™ apartments. They say theyā€™ve never had any problems either. So you just never know.

But, I can see how it would be kinda hard to go from no mortgage to paying rent. That would be weird, especially once retired. So Iā€™m still on the fence about what we will do someday when we move. Iā€™ve still got a good 7 years to goā€¦

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2095

That is quite a luxury in my opinion. I have only lived in places where the property taxes were shared by all, no break for us old people who are done with the school system.

When we bought our last house, back in 1988, with no children, we had no idea we would stay there for 35 years until retirement. You just donā€™t know how your life will proceed, you need to be happy where you live now.

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2096

Probably. Weā€™ve talked about expanding the shower for 20 years, even though it is the only one in the house that still looks great. The tricky thing is we discovered that the county records say it is a half bath, not 3/4. Will need to do the proper things with building permit etc to avoid issues when we sell someday. Property tax would go up a little, but thatā€™s a nit (as long as they donā€™t seek back payment).

We always come back the question of whether we stay in the house long term. This winter I plan to have a quote from local Home Depot, which supposedly has an aging in place design team. Almost asked a designer friend at church yesterday if she hired out for this sort of project, but she mentioned being super busy with other clients.

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2097

I have a question regarding 401k rollover to a roth IRA - I thought I read (a few places) that you had to have earned income in order to roll over any amount of traditional 401k to Roth. In other words you couldnā€™t do it after retirement if both you and your spouse were fully retired with no earned income. Now Iā€™m seeing in other places that is not the case. My husband is retiring 12/31/25 and Iā€™m wondering if we should move enough 401k money to a Roth in 2026 so that it would equal what we were used to paying in taxes anyway. Is that possible or do you really need earned income that year to be allowed to do this? Iā€™m thinking I totally misunderstood what they meant by earned income as what you earned that year but now wonder if an employee 401k from previous years is considered earned income. Neither of use currently have a Roth account, just traditional 401ks, brokerage accts, and hysas.

2098

If we havenā€™t gone through it, I donā€™t think any of us know what we would do if our partner was no longer around.

A friend of mine when she lost her husband, she hired all the lawn service and snow removal out. All maintenance, hired.

Moved to a one story condo, said that her maintenance fees were a lot less than she was paying a month for the house. The condo while smaller, cost a bit less than the house, paid cash. The condo is a new build, the house was 30 years old.

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2099

My sister is 8 years older, single and has Parkinsonā€™s. She lives alone in her single family home that she has owned for 35 years. She did a remodel about 10 years ago and widened her hall and doorways and outfitted one bathroom with a shower with no stepover and room to get into with some ease. She has a cleaning person and a longtime gardener. She loves her home and loves her yard. I worry about her if she falls. After a recent health crisis Iā€™ve got her talking and considering looking at residential retirement communities with steps of care. She could have in home caregivers if needed down the line but we have talked about socializing which would be hard once she no longer can drive. She was at first opposed to a retirement community but after talking to some of her medical team realizes these places have long waiting lists so my not look and if even slightly willing to put her name on a list. She is lucky she has a great pension and plenty of money.

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2100

Very sorry to hear that @FallGirl.

My father died 20 years before my mother, who was living in the house they raised us in. It was a very large house in NJ, where property taxes seem extraordinarily high. Given her asset mix and her declining mobility (I assume not the case for you), I told her it made sense to sell the house. ShawWife and I had a quite a few years earlier found a condo in the same town ā€“ like you, she had a big network of friends ā€“ but she was not ready to think about moving at the time. By the time she needed to move for financial and mobility reasons, smaller places were astronomical. So, she rented an apartment in the same town. Availability was not great ā€“ it is a high-end suburb ā€“ and she took it but was never satisfied with it (not sure she was ever satisfied with anything, actually). When she decided she wanted to make the next move (I canā€™t recall the reason), she moved to a CCRC near my younger sister (a great place, but she was not satisfied with it either).

There is an issue with being forced to move from a rental apartment ā€“ landlord wants to sell (happening to our cleaning lady) or raises rents dramatically. We are not as nimble about packing and moving as we age.

But, what @kiddie says is also true. Housing costs can rise, sometimes in surprising ways, whether for rent, condos or houses. The difference, I guess is that you have more control of your choices if you own ā€“ you can choose whether and when you sell whereas that choice may be made for you in a rental.

We are so happy where we live even though the maintenance costs and property taxes are high. Today, the pool people and landscapers are both here. Last week, we met with the head of the townā€™s Division of Natural Resources or Conservation Commission and two engineering contractors to discuss a plan for restoring the river bank on which we live. It is going to be pretty expensive.

I think for us, the question is the one your raise, @deb922. What would one of us do if the other passes away? Would I want to stay in this huge house by myself? Would ShawWife? Would I rent out part of it ā€“ there is an in-law suite and the survivor could stay either in the main part of the house or the in-law suite. And, ShawWifeā€™s studio could be configured as a stunning living space ā€“ at the moment it has a little bathroom and no kitchen but a bigger bathroom and a kitchen area could be put in (and there is both electricity and gas going into the building). [Our thinking has been that as we age, ShawWife and partner and (hoped-for) family might choose to move in to the main part of the house].

We also need to think ahead to reduced mobility in the future. ShawWife spent the weekend with her mother at her farm. When ShawWife arrived at about 10 Saturday AM, MIL had slipped getting out of bed in the middle of the night and could not pull herself back into the bed. She pulled herself along the floor until she got to a stairway and used the banister and stairs to pull herself up. This apparently took hours. So she was exhausted and in tears when ShawWife arrived. Had ShawWife not come, no one would have found her for days ā€“ the only clue there might be something wrong was that she didnā€™t answer the phone when ShawWife called from the airport. MIL has an Apple Watch which will call the emergency services after a fall but she was not wearing it and thought it was in her apartment in the city (and forgot about its fall detection capability). ShawWife and sibs have organized help for her in the past, but she reduces their hours and they get other jobs. Iā€™d say in general that she exhibits (and has always done so ā€“ not a function of aging) in-the-moment magical thinking. If there is not a problem in the moment, she thinks she does not need help. Then when she needs it she doesnā€™t have it.

So, I hope we are setting ourselves up better and not with magical thinking. If ShawD and hoped-for family donā€™t move in, we have plenty of room to have a live-in person (or couple).

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